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Alternative definitions

venray

Level of Garnet Feather
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Apr 2, 2001
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LOVE: Four-letter word, two vowels, two consonants and two idiots.

DANCING: The vertical frustration of a horizontal desire.

HEADACHE: Method of contraception most widely used by women.

INTELLECTUAL: Someone capable of thinking for more than 2 hours about something other than sex.

PITIFUL: Someone with an erection who walks into a wall and breaks his nose.

TONGUE: Sexual organ which some degenerates use for the purpose of speech.

MONOGAMY: Repressed polygamy.

NANOSECOND: Fraction of time which occurs between the lights turning green and the car behind honking its horn.

NYMPHOMANIAC: Term applied by men to any woman who wants sex more than he does.

TEAMWORK: The possibility of putting the blame on others.

INTERVIEW: That which can be seen between the interviewee's legs.

ETERNITY: Period of time which lasts from when you finished until when you leave her in her house.

EASY: Term applied to any woman with the sexual morals of a man.
FOOTBALL: That which all women marry without knowing.

HARDWARE: The part of the computer which you kick when the software malfunctions.

IMPATIENCE: Waiting in a hurry.

INDIFFERENCE: Attitude adopted by a woman towards a man in whom she has no interest; interpreted by the man as "playing hard to get".

INFLATION: Having to pay next years prices on last year's salary.

ADULT: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR: A place where women curl up and dye.

CANNIBAL: Someone who is fed up with people.

CHICKENS: The only creatures you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

DUST: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

GOSSIP: A person who will never tell a lie if the truth will do more damage.

HANDKERCHIEF: Cold Storage.

INFLATION: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

MOSQUITO: An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN: Grape with a sunburn.

SECRET: Something you tell to one person at a time.

TOOTHACHE: The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW: One of the greatest labor saving devices of today.

YAWN: An honest opinion openly expressed.

WRINKLES: Something other people have. You have character lines.
 
LOVE: Four-letter word, two vowels, two consonants and two idiots.

INTELLECTUAL: Someone capable of thinking for more than 2 hours about something other than sex.

PITIFUL: Someone with an erection who walks into a wall and breaks his nose.

That's funny. :blaugh:
 
LOL 😛
Very funny list, especially headache, secret, and tomorrow. 😀
 
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