There's been a lot of talk lately with regards to how the so-called "vanilla" world views us tickling enthusiasts, but it's certainly not a new topic here at the TMF. For years we've heard how the "narrow-minded" society at large "hates" and "despises" us.
I've always wondered about that because my experience has been exactly the opposite. When I tell people I like tickling, it's met with amusement and sometimes even envy at being about to enjoy something so simple and easily brought about.
I believe there are two reasons for this misperception of hostility.
1) Some people who like tickling the way many of us do are ashamed of it on some level. This shame manifests itself in the form of resentment towards anybody not "afflicted" with the tickle bug. Since they view our interest as something shameful, they can't imagine the general public not doing likewise.
The tragedy is that tickling is one of the coolest and most benign of fetishes. There is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. I've spent a good part of my adult life turning people on to the pleasures of tickling and being tickled.
2) I think the fire of perceived public hostility towards us tickle people is most often stirred by some of the more radical SMers on the forum. Why? Well think about it. There are tickling purists who enjoy tickling for nothing else other than what it is. Then there are those who like tickling as simply one means of control/torture out of many. Neither group is superior over the other. It's just a matter of what you are personally into.
Tickling purists have an advantage over the pain players in that we can indulge in our thing pubically, almost anywhere. We can tickle each other in parks, at shopping malls, on college campuses, and any number of public places. In short, a love of tickling in and of itself does not put us at odds with society in general, as long as it's consentual.
Unfortunately the same cannot be said of many other fetishes, such as S&M, golden showers, brown showers, wetsetters, etc. Those can only be indulged in privacy due to the contraversial nature of them.
What's happened is that some of the SM radicals go to great lengths to exaggerate the public's hostility towards tickling. They would prefer we suffer their fate of isolation. Misery loves company. It was these malcontents who coined the derogatory term "vanilla" in their hostility and spread this concept throughout the BDSM and tickling communities.
Any suggestion of improved public relations for the tickling community is met with derision by some of these doom'n'gloomers. They adamantly oppose any efforts at fitting into society, and prefer us all to share in their exile. "Why should we care what THEY think of us?" they cry out in their self-righteous indignation. My response would be to say, "There's a difference between caring what people think and giving them every reason to think badly of us."
Imagine the host of a party walking around with his dick hanging out of his pants. His buddy smacks him upside the head and says, "What the hell's the matter with you? Put that away! You want people to start leaving?!"
The host responds, "Hey, why should I care what THEY think?! I don't need their approval. If they can't accept me this way, than fuck 'em!"
Without being candid, there are certain TMF members walking around this party with their dicks/tits hanging out, arrogantly declaring their independence from society as though it were superiority.
I for one refuse to buy into this bullshit. It's true that you don't want to be worried about what people think, but at the same time, you don't want to be an inconsiderate asshole either. There is a balance between these two extremes. If we as a community can find that balance, it will go a long way toward building bridges rather than burning them.
__________________
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I've always wondered about that because my experience has been exactly the opposite. When I tell people I like tickling, it's met with amusement and sometimes even envy at being about to enjoy something so simple and easily brought about.
I believe there are two reasons for this misperception of hostility.
1) Some people who like tickling the way many of us do are ashamed of it on some level. This shame manifests itself in the form of resentment towards anybody not "afflicted" with the tickle bug. Since they view our interest as something shameful, they can't imagine the general public not doing likewise.
The tragedy is that tickling is one of the coolest and most benign of fetishes. There is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of. I've spent a good part of my adult life turning people on to the pleasures of tickling and being tickled.
2) I think the fire of perceived public hostility towards us tickle people is most often stirred by some of the more radical SMers on the forum. Why? Well think about it. There are tickling purists who enjoy tickling for nothing else other than what it is. Then there are those who like tickling as simply one means of control/torture out of many. Neither group is superior over the other. It's just a matter of what you are personally into.
Tickling purists have an advantage over the pain players in that we can indulge in our thing pubically, almost anywhere. We can tickle each other in parks, at shopping malls, on college campuses, and any number of public places. In short, a love of tickling in and of itself does not put us at odds with society in general, as long as it's consentual.
Unfortunately the same cannot be said of many other fetishes, such as S&M, golden showers, brown showers, wetsetters, etc. Those can only be indulged in privacy due to the contraversial nature of them.
What's happened is that some of the SM radicals go to great lengths to exaggerate the public's hostility towards tickling. They would prefer we suffer their fate of isolation. Misery loves company. It was these malcontents who coined the derogatory term "vanilla" in their hostility and spread this concept throughout the BDSM and tickling communities.
Any suggestion of improved public relations for the tickling community is met with derision by some of these doom'n'gloomers. They adamantly oppose any efforts at fitting into society, and prefer us all to share in their exile. "Why should we care what THEY think of us?" they cry out in their self-righteous indignation. My response would be to say, "There's a difference between caring what people think and giving them every reason to think badly of us."
Imagine the host of a party walking around with his dick hanging out of his pants. His buddy smacks him upside the head and says, "What the hell's the matter with you? Put that away! You want people to start leaving?!"
The host responds, "Hey, why should I care what THEY think?! I don't need their approval. If they can't accept me this way, than fuck 'em!"
Without being candid, there are certain TMF members walking around this party with their dicks/tits hanging out, arrogantly declaring their independence from society as though it were superiority.
I for one refuse to buy into this bullshit. It's true that you don't want to be worried about what people think, but at the same time, you don't want to be an inconsiderate asshole either. There is a balance between these two extremes. If we as a community can find that balance, it will go a long way toward building bridges rather than burning them.
__________________
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