Going to tell my girl about my fetish tomorrow...

...And based on what I've heard, it's probably for the best. Right?

Most people who have posted here about 'outing' themselves to a significant other have said it was a positive thing, right? It made your relationship stronger, they were into making you happy, it turned them on somewhat. Right?

Well, hopefully I haven't been selective about what I've read here, because I'm going to take the plunge tomorrow, and let the chips fall where they may. I'm in love with this girl, and she's been in my life for a long time now. I've felt weird for a while, not being able to share this part of my life with her. I want to.

Thing is, I have a real feeling she's not going to understand any of this. Not the fetish, not the forum, none of it. She's a 'good girl,' young, bright, does well in school and respects her parents, yadda yadda. She's gotten to behave badly since she's known me (😉), but I don't think she'll understand why this is erotic for me, or for anyone. And she'll judge me. She does love me, so there's that, but in the end that can't really change who you are.

And you lucky, lucky people! You all get front row seats to my balls-out, bent-over humiliation. I'm telling her tomorrow evening, so if you have any advice on how to make this work before then, I'd appreciate it. And I'll let you know how it goes after the fact.

My advice is: Do it! If you wind up with a long term relationship, she's going to figure it out anyway. Better not to hide things.

And it will be a weight off your chest to have it done. 🙂

Best of luck to you! My fingers are crossed that it goes well.

Good luck dude. You can try softening the blow by asking her if she's heard about other, weirder fetishes. Then tickling will seem benign - unless she hates it.

Who knows, maybe she turns out to be a bit kinky too? 😉 Haven't really got any advice, but I'm rooting for you man! Hope it goes well. 🙂

Auww - good luck, babe. I'm rooting for you. *hugrapez*

Good luck... But You may be in for a surprise...
Most Good Girls are... well, just masks for the boiling energy beneath the surface 😉

"She's a 'good girl,' "

Thats the best kind, she will probably already have been a member here! ha!

Good luck, today, man! You don't seem to exhibit the personality that would have difficulty revealing this sort of thing. I'm sure you'll do fine. Hasn't she read your term paper? 😛

Good luck! My advice is not to tell everything all at once. Maybe too much for her to absorb? Maybe just tell her that you find tickling erotic, to the point that it's a fetish. Hold off on the "and I spend time on this forum, etc." for a separate conversation.

Best of luck amigo. Hope it turns out well for you.

Have you ever outed yourself with anyone else? If she's the first, you could let her know that. I imagine she would feel honored and even more in love with you for sharing your innermost secret with her.
Best of luck!

Good LucK!

You'll do Great! All our friends on the TMF are right.

Believe in yourself. Believe in her.

Take it one step at a time.

And just because she's a good girl doesn't mean she won't be responsive to you and your fetish. I know this becaue I use to be a good girl...granted long time ago but still.

P.S.
I wouldn't be surprised if she doesn't have at least a slight idea about your fetish even if she doesn't know what to call it.

Hope everything works out for the best , dude. Good luck to ya.

Good luck man. Hope it works for the best.

I'm on the edge of my voyeuristic seat.

I've rarely had a negative reaction, but I've almost never 'told'. It just sort of comes up. So to speak.

I agree with someone or other who said that there's no reason to blurt out the whole plethora of internet stuff, especially if she's easily startled. Avoid technical terms like 'sub' and 'dom' and 'custom built spanking stool with adjustable stocks and back-up electrical generator'.

But you know there's no such thing as a good girl, don't you? Of course you do.

I'm sure she has her reasons for being a bit reserved about sex, so for goodness sake, go gently into that good night. Make it nice for her. Meet her halfway.

That means oral...lots of oral.

That ALSO means none of this emotional blackmail shit. Please do not intertwine this with how much you love her, how much she loves you and wouldn't she like to please you wocka wocka wocka. That's for pimps and kidnappers, not for confident men in fulfilling relationships.

naughtylucy said:

That means oral...lots of oral.

Click to expand...

I like the way you think. 😛 😀

good luck!

c7_assassin said:

...And based on what I've heard, it's probably for the best. Right?

Most people who have posted here about 'outing' themselves to a significant other have said it was a positive thing, right? It made your relationship stronger, they were into making you happy, it turned them on somewhat. Right?

Well, hopefully I haven't been selective about what I've read here, because I'm going to take the plunge tomorrow, and let the chips fall where they may. I'm in love with this girl, and she's been in my life for a long time now. I've felt weird for a while, not being able to share this part of my life with her. I want to.

Thing is, I have a real feeling she's not going to understand any of this. Not the fetish, not the forum, none of it. She's a 'good girl,' young, bright, does well in school and respects her parents, yadda yadda. She's gotten to behave badly since she's known me (😉), but I don't think she'll understand why this is erotic for me, or for anyone. And she'll judge me. She does love me, so there's that, but in the end that can't really change who you are.

And you lucky, lucky people! You all get front row seats to my balls-out, bent-over humiliation. I'm telling her tomorrow evening, so if you have any advice on how to make this work before then, I'd appreciate it. And I'll let you know how it goes after the fact.

Click to expand...

congrats on your relationship and decision to tell her what truly makes you happy! from our conversations, you seem like a nice, intelligent, suave, upstanding and fun guy. given that combination, i can't imagine that she doesn't have some inkling that you're seriously into tickling. i can't imagine that if she's been in your life for a while you haven't snuck in a few tickles. i doubt it will be a surprise to her. you say that you've already corrupted her some. it sounds as though she hasn't complained about you corrupting her so far, so why not just take her to the next level 🙂 fwiw, one of the things i like about tmf is that it seems to have a lot of members that i would define as "wholesome," which is a good thing. i hope your feeling that she won't understand is just nerves talking.

if i have any advice to offer, it's that you present tickling as something that you find to be a normal and natural part of a relationship and would like to explore further with her. ask her about her experiences with tickling. ask her if she's ever been tickled or wanted to be OR if she's ever wanted to tickle someone herself or has in the past. the more normal and natural you present tickling, the more she'll take it as something normal. if you present it from a place of shame or as something dirty or bad, she may think you have something to be ashamed about or that you don't feel it's something that's okay. present tickling as the playful, fun, erotic activity that it is. show her how erotic it can be as well as how good, wholesome and playful it can be.

you may want to approach the topic in a relaxed way rather than a "we need to talk" way. you may want to talk about wanting to add an element that's near and dear to your heart to your relationship. you may want to tell her how you first came to find out that you liked tickling. i'm not sure if i would tell her about tmf and every little detail. i might ease her in with letting her know that it's an element that's very satisfying to you and that you'd really like her to at least be willing to explore with you. as she becomes accustomed to being tickled, then tell her more. ask her if there are other things she'd like to explore in the relationship, as she may be holding back some of her desires as well. perhaps under her "good girl" persona, she wants to make you her personal sex slave 😉

i personally wouldn't use the word "fetish." strictly speaking, a fetish is something without which you can't get sexually aroused. it's also a word that can carry a heavy negative connotation depending upon the person. if you've been in a relationship with her for a while and been sexual, then while you may have a great love of tickling and strong desire for it to part of your relationship, it obviously isn't a requirement in order for you to be aroused.

however, if tickling is a requirement for you to be truly fulfilled, then i'd suggest that you tell any future potential partners upfront about tickling and have it be a deal breaker. it's obviously too late with your current gf. i can't imagine a relationship lasting and being fulfilling if she doesn't share your love of tickling or understand that while you love her, you need to get your tickling needs met elsewhere. even if it isn't a requirement for you, i think it's important to ask yourself how long you'll be able to feel comfortable without tickling being part of the relationship and whether you're willing to jeopardize your fulfillment by not getting your tickling needs met or your integrity and relationship by getting your needs met elsewhere if she's not into being tickled. hopefully this will be a moot issue.

i suspect you're going to do a great job tonight. you have the social skills to be honest, loving and to communicate your needs and desires at the same time.

i'll be thinking of you and wishing the best for you my friend. good luck!

Thanks so much for the support, you guys. You're all awesome.

So, it's done. I'm out. And it went much, much better than I expected. 🙂

The way I started was by showing her the paper on tickling I had written. She knew it had something to do with sexual fantasies and had been begging me to show it to her for weeks. So I did. That segued into a talk about what she thought about kinkiness, and people who were into tickling, and I just casually mentioned that I'm into it too.

And much to my surprise, she didn't freak out, she said she didn't think it was a weird sexual fantasy at all. In her words, "You like ticking girls, so that's normal." Her mind works in cute ways. I think she was just relieved that my fetish wasn't being spanked by leather-clad midgets.

She was also a little pissed that I had waited so long to tell her about what I was into, and that I had taken trouble to hide it from her. She pointed out that I already knew what her fantasies are. I said that she was the first person I had ever told. She liked that. And she asked to see the TMF, so I showed her. I also showed her a couple of Tickle Abuse clips of Brooke. She mentioned that I should get myself a big feather. 🙂

My heart rate is still jacked from the experience...intimacy issues and whatnot. I'm going to have a few drinks now to calm my nerves, but the point is this went well and I'm happy to share it with all of you.

Oh, also...

naughtylucy said:

That means oral...lots of oral.

Click to expand...

Pro tip. 😉

c7_assassin said:

Thanks so much for the support, you guys. You're all awesome.

So, it's done. I'm out. And it went much, much better than I expected. 🙂

The way I started was by showing her the paper on tickling I had written. She knew it had something to do with sexual fantasies and had been begging me to show it to her for weeks. So I did. That segued into a talk about what she thought about kinkiness, and people who were into tickling, and I just casually mentioned that I'm into it too.

And much to my surprise, she didn't freak out, she said she didn't think it was a weird sexual fantasy at all. In her words, "You like ticking girls, so that's normal." Her mind works in cute ways. I think she was just relieved that my fetish wasn't being spanked by leather-clad midgets.

She was also a little pissed that I had waited so long to tell her about what I was into, and that I had taken trouble to hide it from her. She pointed out that I already knew what her fantasies are. I said that she was the first person I had ever told. She liked that. And she asked to see the TMF, so I showed her. I also showed her a couple of Tickle Abuse clips of Brooke. She mentioned that I should get myself a big feather. 🙂

My heart rate is still jacked from the experience...intimacy issues and whatnot. I'm going to have a few drinks now to calm my nerves, but the point is this went well and I'm happy to share it with all of you.

Oh, also...



Pro tip. 😉

Click to expand...

That's wonderful! I can only imagine the elation you're feeling right now. I'm so happy that it all went over so well. Here's to keeping that happy feeling going!

Wow, congrats!!! That's awesome. That's funny what she mentioned about tickling girls being normal. Cute. 😀

Knew it would work out 🙂

c7_assassin said:

Thanks so much for the support, you guys. You're all awesome.

So, it's done. I'm out. And it went much, much better than I expected. 🙂

The way I started was by showing her the paper on tickling I had written. She knew it had something to do with sexual fantasies and had been begging me to show it to her for weeks. So I did. That segued into a talk about what she thought about kinkiness, and people who were into tickling, and I just casually mentioned that I'm into it too.

And much to my surprise, she didn't freak out, she said she didn't think it was a weird sexual fantasy at all. In her words, "You like ticking girls, so that's normal." Her mind works in cute ways. I think she was just relieved that my fetish wasn't being spanked by leather-clad midgets.

She was also a little pissed that I had waited so long to tell her about what I was into, and that I had taken trouble to hide it from her. She pointed out that I already knew what her fantasies are. I said that she was the first person I had ever told. She liked that. And she asked to see the TMF, so I showed her. I also showed her a couple of Tickle Abuse clips of Brooke. She mentioned that I should get myself a big feather. 🙂

My heart rate is still jacked from the experience...intimacy issues and whatnot. I'm going to have a few drinks now to calm my nerves, but the point is this went well and I'm happy to share it with all of you.

Oh, also...



Pro tip. 😉

Click to expand...

*highfive* Many congrats! 😀

????

You like girls?