A Guide to Help You Determine Whether You are In Love, In Lust, or Married
LOVE - when your eyes meet across a crowded room.
LUST - when your tongues meet across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE - when your belt won't meet around your waist, and you don't care.
LOVE - when intercourse is called making love.
LUST - all other times.
MARRIAGE - what's intercourse?
LOVE - when you share everything you own.
LUST - when you think twice about giving your partner bus money.
MARRIAGE - when the bank owns everything.
LOVE - when it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
LUST - when the relationship is over if you don't climax.
MARRIAGE - what's a climax?
LOVE - when you phone each other just to say "I love you".
LUST - when you phone each other just to organize sex.
MARRIAGE - when you phone each other to find out what time your kid's game starts.
LOVE - when you write poems about your partner.
LUST - when all you write is your partner's phone number.
MARRIAGE - when all you write is checks.
LOVE - when you show concern for your true love's feelings.
LUST - when you show concern for whether your partner is cute and sexy.
MARRIAGE - when your only concern is what's on television. And where is the remote?
LOVE - when your farewell is, "I love you, darling."
LUST - when your farewell is, "Same time next week?"
MARRIAGE - when your farewell is, "Don't forget to pick up the kids on the way home."
LOVE - when you are proud to be seen in public with your partner.
LUST - when you only see each other in the bedroom.
MARRIAGE - when you never see each other awake.
LOVE - when your heart flutters every time you see them.
LUST - when your groin twitches every time you see them.
MARRIAGE - when your wallet empties every time you see them.
LOVE - when nobody else matters.
LUST - when nobody else knows.
MARRIAGE - when everybody else matters and you don't care who knows.
LOVE - when all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
LUST - when all the songs on the radio are just the same old mushy stuff.
MARRIAGE - when you never have time to listen to music.
LOVE - when breaking up is something you try not to think about.
LUST - when staying together is something you try not to think about.
MARRIAGE - when wondering how you will get through the day is something you try not to think about.
LOVE - when you're interested in everything your partner does.
LUST - when you're only interested in one thing.
MARRIAGE - when you're not interested in what your partner does. And where IS that darned remote?
LOVE - when your eyes meet across a crowded room.
LUST - when your tongues meet across a crowded room.
MARRIAGE - when your belt won't meet around your waist, and you don't care.
LOVE - when intercourse is called making love.
LUST - all other times.
MARRIAGE - what's intercourse?
LOVE - when you share everything you own.
LUST - when you think twice about giving your partner bus money.
MARRIAGE - when the bank owns everything.
LOVE - when it doesn't matter if you don't climax.
LUST - when the relationship is over if you don't climax.
MARRIAGE - what's a climax?
LOVE - when you phone each other just to say "I love you".
LUST - when you phone each other just to organize sex.
MARRIAGE - when you phone each other to find out what time your kid's game starts.
LOVE - when you write poems about your partner.
LUST - when all you write is your partner's phone number.
MARRIAGE - when all you write is checks.
LOVE - when you show concern for your true love's feelings.
LUST - when you show concern for whether your partner is cute and sexy.
MARRIAGE - when your only concern is what's on television. And where is the remote?
LOVE - when your farewell is, "I love you, darling."
LUST - when your farewell is, "Same time next week?"
MARRIAGE - when your farewell is, "Don't forget to pick up the kids on the way home."
LOVE - when you are proud to be seen in public with your partner.
LUST - when you only see each other in the bedroom.
MARRIAGE - when you never see each other awake.
LOVE - when your heart flutters every time you see them.
LUST - when your groin twitches every time you see them.
MARRIAGE - when your wallet empties every time you see them.
LOVE - when nobody else matters.
LUST - when nobody else knows.
MARRIAGE - when everybody else matters and you don't care who knows.
LOVE - when all the songs on the radio describe exactly how you feel.
LUST - when all the songs on the radio are just the same old mushy stuff.
MARRIAGE - when you never have time to listen to music.
LOVE - when breaking up is something you try not to think about.
LUST - when staying together is something you try not to think about.
MARRIAGE - when wondering how you will get through the day is something you try not to think about.
LOVE - when you're interested in everything your partner does.
LUST - when you're only interested in one thing.
MARRIAGE - when you're not interested in what your partner does. And where IS that darned remote?
