an embarrassing problem

[heroforhalos]

I've been into tickling for as long as I can remember.
Of course I've never told anyone.

Almost every fantasy I have involves me bound and tickled mercilessly all over my body, but especially my penis, and am teased out of my mind until I'm finally allowed release. Then some nice aftercare.
The other that occurs often is thinking of doing the same thing to my s/o.

Now, that all sounds very nice and sexy, but I just have one problem.

I'm not ticklish!

I don't think my s/o is into being tickled, I have tried it on some occasions (ie: tickling their feet while I give them head), and I think it made them feel weird.
They didn't ask me to do it again, so I guess they're not into it, at least receiving.

I've been trying to "train" myself into being ticklish with little success.
D:
Help?

 

[Slaver123]

Are you certain you're not ticklish? The person tickling you might have sucked at it; just hitting one spot and assuming it'd just work on you. You may be ticklish in places you never expected; don't expect your feet to "work".

My own ticklishness turns itself off sometimes; it comes and goes. Some days it's better than others. I'm ticklish when I'm taken by suprise, but the tickler has to keep switching spots on me cause my skin gets used to it real fast. Wish someone could just simply brush a feather against my foot and make me howl for hours, but tickling's not so simple a sensation. It's largely about your mental state.

Has your s/o tried tying and tickling you like you really want? You should share this fantasy with her (or him?) If you're already intimate with the other person, it's as easy as just asking (at the right time). If they love you they'll indulge your fantasy, and there's a good chance they'll come to enjoy satisfying you in this way.

 

[heroforhalos]

I'm pretty certain I'm not. A lot of previous s/o's as well as flings would sometimes try to tickle me in a playful manner, and pretty much any place you can think of has been tried, and yet; nothing.

They always get discouraged by my lack of response and exclaim "you're no fun." and don't ever do it again, when I want to say "please don't stop"! D:

Sometimes my current s/o will try to tickle me to make me smile, I think he's beginning to guess that I'm into it, but I have to focus really hard and it seems to me like I'm mostly pretending to be ticklish then. And he's never managed to get a laugh out of me yet, though he says he's going to keep trying.

It's just frustrating.
I'm so envious of you guys.

 

[Slaver123]

Well, don't be envious of me. I can't seem to find a "significant other" at all, let alone a tickler/lee... Plus my ticklishness is hit-or -miss....

Try this; next time you're tied and tickled but it's not really working, FAKE IT. Laugh and squirm at the slightest sensation even if it's not a genuine reaction; writhe and plead like it's real torture even though it's not. This may sound false and misleading, but it can actually warm you up and lead to real sensations. It can get you into the mental state you need.

 

[HOLLYWOOD]

the hollywood brother thinks maybe you ought to try baby oil and a sonic care. the hollywood brother has heard that this can work wonders

 

[ticklebug101]

Agreed on the baby oil account there HWB. Using a comb or hairbrush on oiled up feet is a wicked combination, just ask my lee :reddevil: 😉

 

[heroforhalos]

Thanks for the tips, you guys! I'll see if I can work up the nerve to ask my s/o to try them out on me.

 

[juanmiller]

Part of your problem may be that now you're worried you won't be ticklish, and negative feelings can kill ticklishness, just like they can kill sexual pleasure. It can become a vicious circle where you don't feel good precisely because you are worried you won't feel good.

I also agree that you might just need to find the right kind of tickling. If someone randomly/roughly tries to tickle me when I'm not ready for it, it doesn't tickle at all, let alone feel good. It has to be in the right setting and context. Think about it... if you wanted to try spanking play, would you expect to be aroused by somebody suddenly smacking your ass without warning? Maybe, but more likely, the desire has more to do with a whole fantasy surrounding the actions and the sensations, the interplay between you and your partner, etc. And that's exactly what you're saying in this post -- you want to play out a more elaborate scene. So it's not surprising that a few little tickles didn't feel right.

I think to figure this out you're going to need to level with your partner. You need to talk honestly about your fantasies and ask if they'd be willing to try what you're interested in. That's the only way you'll be able to fairly assess whether it can be like you imagined.

And if it turns out that you really aren't ticklish, there are a lot of sensations you can still enjoy that might align with your interests. Light stroking and touching can still feel REALLY good even in places where it doesn't tickle. I often like that just as much or more than "ha ha" tickling.

 

[Slaver123]

Part of your problem may be that now you're worried you won't be ticklish, and negative feelings can kill ticklishness, just like they can kill sexual pleasure. It can become a vicious circle where you don't feel good precisely because you are worried you won't feel good....

....And if it turns out that you really aren't ticklish, there are a lot of sensations you can still enjoy that might align with your interests. Light stroking and touching can still feel REALLY good even in places where it doesn't tickle. I often like that just as much or more than "ha ha" tickling.

"Juanmiller" makes some great points, "Remus".

And you're still a 'Ler' even if your 'lee' side doesn't work....So start tickling other people!