Toesheldback
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So, this is technically a tickle story and belongs in that section. But it’s such a crazy time capsule, that I thought others might enjoy it just for the nostalgia.
I wrote this story back in the mid-1990s so it’s likely 30 years old. I was driving the other day listening to podcasts and they were talking about terrible bosses. Out of nowhere, this story popped into my mind - totally forgot I had written it. It was posted on the old Usenet newsgroups. Google found it.
Crazy how much things have changed in 30 years. Adding machine? Hold buttons? Some people thought this was a real entry in a contest, but no, it was fiction.
Hope you enjoy, for either nostalgia or other reasons.
Dear Gaby:
I'm writing this letter as an entry in your Worst Boss in Boston contest.
Her name is Cindy Taylor and we work at a downtown ad agency. She is very
sick and twisted; I call her the Mad Tickler. Let me tell you what she did.
I had confided in her about my boyfriend and how one day he had tickled
my feet, and how ticklish my feet were. That was my big mistake. I answer
the
telephone for Cindy, and was talking to a major client when she sat at a
chair next to my desk. Of course I was surprised when she grabbed my ankle
and put my left foot in her lap. I was stunned and couldn't do anything
because I was on the telephone. I still had no idea what she was going to
do when she pulled my pump off. Then, suddenly, while I was using my adding
machine, she tucked my foot under her arm and began tickling my foot!
I immediately tried to yank my foot away, but couldn't because Cindy was
holding it really tight. Our client was trying to figure out why I had gone
quiet all of a sudden, so I was stuttering while trying to fight Cindy off.
I was totally confused and on the verge of laughing out loud. I stammered
to our client, "Hold on a second", but Cindy immediately pulled on my
foot and leg, which pulled my rolling chair away from my desk and the hold
button
on my phone, so I couldn't reach it.
Cindy's fingernails are really long, and I just couldn't take anymore
tickling. I decided to tell our client what was goign on while I still
could
talk. I said, "I'm really sorry, Janice, but Cindy Taylor is tickling my
feet and I can't stop her. Can I call..." and just then, Cindy found the
spot on my foot that is the most ticklish, right below the ball of my
foot on the sole. I lost it.
I shrieked and kicked mightily, but Cindy held on to my foot tighter. I
began laughing really hard, and Cindy got this little smirk on her face and
kept tickling that same spot! She was really good at it to boot, either
because she grew up with brothers and sisters like I did, or because her
nails were so long. Anyway, she was about ten times better at tickling than
my boyfriend, and my laughter was only adding fuel to her fire.
Of course, I had completely forgotten that I still had Janice on the phone,
which was still stuck to my ear. In the middle of this maddening tickling,
Janice was trying to talk with me!
I had seen Janice once or twice, she's the real serious, yuppie type. She
said to me, "She's tickling your feet right now?" I gasped, through my
laughter, "Yyy.. Yes!". Janice was silent for a second. Cindy was now
tickling the undersides of my toes, which I had no idea were ticklish, but
in her hands had surpassed my arch in ticklishness.
I was determined to be professional to Janice and not hang up on her while
I endured the tickling session. "Where on your feet is she tickling you?",
Janice asked with a humorous tone in her voice. "My..my..my toes. Under my
toes", I managed before I howled again with laughter. "Are you wearing
nylons?", Janice asked me. I was thrown by her interest in my predicament,
but loyal old me, I tried to answer all her questions. "No!", I screamed.
I heard her chucklingon the other end, and she said, "Oh, bad move. I'll
bet she's really tickling your toes, huh? Kitchy kitchy.."
So now I was getting tickled ny one person and taunted ny another! Tears
were beginning to well up in my eyes at the tickling my poor toes were get-
ting. Cindy had heard me answer Janice and obviously had figured out that
Janice was asking questions about the tickling. I went ahead and dropped
the
phone on the desk, so I could pay full attention to getting myself out of
the mess. In a flash, Cindy dropped my foot and grabbed the other one
before
I could react. I was really weak with laughter, and then CIndy picked
thephone up off the desk. I thought maybe she had come to her senses, but
in-
stead she started talking to Janice.
"Hi Janice", she began. She paused, listening, and I was starting to
recover
enough to struggle again, because no way did I want my other shoe to come
off. Cindy started laughing on the phone, and I caught her end of the con-
versation:
"Oh, just a joke... I've got her other one right here, I'm just getting
ready
to take her shoe off... Under my arm... Yeah... Yep (glancing at me with
agrin) she's mine.. Hey! I know! You tell me what to do and I'll be your
fingers... Yeah, and your eyes... Right, well she's starting to struggle a
bit, so you'd better start... Ok, I'm pulling her pump off.. Ok, where to?
Tops or bottoms?.. OK, here we go!..."
Cindy began gently grazing her nails across the tops of my toes. I was
really tired from the last battle, so I could only sit back and wait for
the waves ot ticklishness to hit. It was only light tickling, but my light
giggles started turning hysterical before long. Cindy began her rolling
commentary for Janice's sake:
"Umm, just kind of giggling... Yeah... Ok..Heel to toes or toes to heel?..
OK.. ZZZZZZiiiiiiip! (Laughing) She just jumped about three feet in the
air..
Again?.. OK.. ZZZZZZiiiiiip... No, I'm using pretty firm pressure.. Oh, no,
I'm sorry, I'm just using my index fingernail... OK, just tell me when to
stop..."
Cindy began tickling my bare sole sharply, using all four fingers, up and
down from heel to toe and back again. I was now screaming with laughter,
but since we're in a new building and there's nobody else on our floor for
now,
nobody was coming to my rescue. Cindy started talking with Janice again:
"(Laughing) Yeah, that's her, she's making a racket. Has she wet..? No, I
don't think so... Probably won't be much longer though if I don't stop...
Eeeew, you nut, I'm not going to suck her toes. You'll have to be satisfied
with tickling her. Ummm.. (Looking at me).. she's pretty much a blob of
jelly right now... Oh, come on, Janice.. Oh, all right, but only once and
then I have to let her go, she's gonna have a heart attack. Here goes.."
Cindy put the phone down, and noticing that I wasn't struggling anymore,
bent down a bit and put my toes in her warm mouth, darting her tongue in
between them and nibbling them gently with her perfect teeth, all while she
kept grating her nails on my sole. The sensation was so strange (and mildly
exciting, to be brutally honest) that I immediately wet my pants while I
laughed. She only sucked my toes for about ten seconds, and then she let
my foot go. She chuckled to Janice that she was going to wash her mouth out
with soap when she picked the phone up again, I think. I was pretty much
out of it. I sat there while she snickered at me until I could get up and
go to
the ladies room.
I'd love to hear any of your readers top this!
Too Ticklish in Boston
I wrote this story back in the mid-1990s so it’s likely 30 years old. I was driving the other day listening to podcasts and they were talking about terrible bosses. Out of nowhere, this story popped into my mind - totally forgot I had written it. It was posted on the old Usenet newsgroups. Google found it.
Crazy how much things have changed in 30 years. Adding machine? Hold buttons? Some people thought this was a real entry in a contest, but no, it was fiction.
Hope you enjoy, for either nostalgia or other reasons.
Dear Gaby:
I'm writing this letter as an entry in your Worst Boss in Boston contest.
Her name is Cindy Taylor and we work at a downtown ad agency. She is very
sick and twisted; I call her the Mad Tickler. Let me tell you what she did.
I had confided in her about my boyfriend and how one day he had tickled
my feet, and how ticklish my feet were. That was my big mistake. I answer
the
telephone for Cindy, and was talking to a major client when she sat at a
chair next to my desk. Of course I was surprised when she grabbed my ankle
and put my left foot in her lap. I was stunned and couldn't do anything
because I was on the telephone. I still had no idea what she was going to
do when she pulled my pump off. Then, suddenly, while I was using my adding
machine, she tucked my foot under her arm and began tickling my foot!
I immediately tried to yank my foot away, but couldn't because Cindy was
holding it really tight. Our client was trying to figure out why I had gone
quiet all of a sudden, so I was stuttering while trying to fight Cindy off.
I was totally confused and on the verge of laughing out loud. I stammered
to our client, "Hold on a second", but Cindy immediately pulled on my
foot and leg, which pulled my rolling chair away from my desk and the hold
button
on my phone, so I couldn't reach it.
Cindy's fingernails are really long, and I just couldn't take anymore
tickling. I decided to tell our client what was goign on while I still
could
talk. I said, "I'm really sorry, Janice, but Cindy Taylor is tickling my
feet and I can't stop her. Can I call..." and just then, Cindy found the
spot on my foot that is the most ticklish, right below the ball of my
foot on the sole. I lost it.
I shrieked and kicked mightily, but Cindy held on to my foot tighter. I
began laughing really hard, and Cindy got this little smirk on her face and
kept tickling that same spot! She was really good at it to boot, either
because she grew up with brothers and sisters like I did, or because her
nails were so long. Anyway, she was about ten times better at tickling than
my boyfriend, and my laughter was only adding fuel to her fire.
Of course, I had completely forgotten that I still had Janice on the phone,
which was still stuck to my ear. In the middle of this maddening tickling,
Janice was trying to talk with me!
I had seen Janice once or twice, she's the real serious, yuppie type. She
said to me, "She's tickling your feet right now?" I gasped, through my
laughter, "Yyy.. Yes!". Janice was silent for a second. Cindy was now
tickling the undersides of my toes, which I had no idea were ticklish, but
in her hands had surpassed my arch in ticklishness.
I was determined to be professional to Janice and not hang up on her while
I endured the tickling session. "Where on your feet is she tickling you?",
Janice asked with a humorous tone in her voice. "My..my..my toes. Under my
toes", I managed before I howled again with laughter. "Are you wearing
nylons?", Janice asked me. I was thrown by her interest in my predicament,
but loyal old me, I tried to answer all her questions. "No!", I screamed.
I heard her chucklingon the other end, and she said, "Oh, bad move. I'll
bet she's really tickling your toes, huh? Kitchy kitchy.."
So now I was getting tickled ny one person and taunted ny another! Tears
were beginning to well up in my eyes at the tickling my poor toes were get-
ting. Cindy had heard me answer Janice and obviously had figured out that
Janice was asking questions about the tickling. I went ahead and dropped
the
phone on the desk, so I could pay full attention to getting myself out of
the mess. In a flash, Cindy dropped my foot and grabbed the other one
before
I could react. I was really weak with laughter, and then CIndy picked
thephone up off the desk. I thought maybe she had come to her senses, but
in-
stead she started talking to Janice.
"Hi Janice", she began. She paused, listening, and I was starting to
recover
enough to struggle again, because no way did I want my other shoe to come
off. Cindy started laughing on the phone, and I caught her end of the con-
versation:
"Oh, just a joke... I've got her other one right here, I'm just getting
ready
to take her shoe off... Under my arm... Yeah... Yep (glancing at me with
agrin) she's mine.. Hey! I know! You tell me what to do and I'll be your
fingers... Yeah, and your eyes... Right, well she's starting to struggle a
bit, so you'd better start... Ok, I'm pulling her pump off.. Ok, where to?
Tops or bottoms?.. OK, here we go!..."
Cindy began gently grazing her nails across the tops of my toes. I was
really tired from the last battle, so I could only sit back and wait for
the waves ot ticklishness to hit. It was only light tickling, but my light
giggles started turning hysterical before long. Cindy began her rolling
commentary for Janice's sake:
"Umm, just kind of giggling... Yeah... Ok..Heel to toes or toes to heel?..
OK.. ZZZZZZiiiiiiip! (Laughing) She just jumped about three feet in the
air..
Again?.. OK.. ZZZZZZiiiiiip... No, I'm using pretty firm pressure.. Oh, no,
I'm sorry, I'm just using my index fingernail... OK, just tell me when to
stop..."
Cindy began tickling my bare sole sharply, using all four fingers, up and
down from heel to toe and back again. I was now screaming with laughter,
but since we're in a new building and there's nobody else on our floor for
now,
nobody was coming to my rescue. Cindy started talking with Janice again:
"(Laughing) Yeah, that's her, she's making a racket. Has she wet..? No, I
don't think so... Probably won't be much longer though if I don't stop...
Eeeew, you nut, I'm not going to suck her toes. You'll have to be satisfied
with tickling her. Ummm.. (Looking at me).. she's pretty much a blob of
jelly right now... Oh, come on, Janice.. Oh, all right, but only once and
then I have to let her go, she's gonna have a heart attack. Here goes.."
Cindy put the phone down, and noticing that I wasn't struggling anymore,
bent down a bit and put my toes in her warm mouth, darting her tongue in
between them and nibbling them gently with her perfect teeth, all while she
kept grating her nails on my sole. The sensation was so strange (and mildly
exciting, to be brutally honest) that I immediately wet my pants while I
laughed. She only sucked my toes for about ten seconds, and then she let
my foot go. She chuckled to Janice that she was going to wash her mouth out
with soap when she picked the phone up again, I think. I was pretty much
out of it. I sat there while she snickered at me until I could get up and
go to
the ladies room.
I'd love to hear any of your readers top this!
Too Ticklish in Boston
Thanks for reviving it here. 
