Any Links Between Tickling Fetish And Erectile Dysfunction?

[sum_weirdo]

I don't necessarily expect people to pile in to answer this question but I'm reaching for whatever straws I can.

The fact is good old fashioned intercourse has largely eluded me my whole life. Ramming my penis into an oddly shaped hole has yet to feel like a turn on, and I've only successfully gotten in there once or twice because my erection isn't strong enough.

After a lot of reflection over the years this problem doesn't appear to be anything mechanical. I'm fully capable of getting an erection when I think about tickling, or just at random. And more recently I've had the important realization that it isn't necessarily tickling that turns me on, but rather the feeling of stimulating a sensitive area in my partner. A while ago I had the pleasure of "tickling" her clitoris with my finger for a protracted time and it was hot as hell. I got the most erect I've been in years. But I didn't choose to try and penetrate her at that time because I felt I could build on this in the future.

Well...I don't have a future if I don't figure this out sooner than later. After a lot of patience my girlfriend has suddenly cut me off, and although we still share a bed we're basically broken up. She left the door open for me to fix this problem of mine but in no uncertain terms she is not willing to be part of my experimentation. I either unlock the secret of getting and keeping an erection on my own or that's that.

I'll elaborate more later but I'm late for an appointment.

 

[Johnny lea]

First of all I think your stressing yourself out too much by weighing the outcome of literally everything on this situation your experiencing. It's going to potentially add to affecting your performance by literally screwing your mind. In fact do you feel pressure to perform?

How open are you with your partner about what pleases you and your needs in the bedroom? Can you sit down with each other and have an open and honest discussion about what satisfies you both? You mention what you do for your partner, however does she know how to touch and please you in the way you like?

The other issue is how much time do you spend immersed in your tickle fetish? if it's all you fantasise about and find sexual pleasure in then it can alter the way your wired for arousal.

I have no answer but I think questions to ask yourself and open discussion could begin your journey.

 

[Deleted member 2452]

this is your fetish, and w/o your fetish you can't attain and keep your erection. you are not alone by any means! you can try hypnosis, that may help.

steve

 

[chicago]

First of all, how could you not be turned on by something described as an "oddly shaped hole?" I mean, damn, that sounds hot, right? / end sarcasm ]

Clearly, you don't have erectile dysfunction if your junk functions.

For some people, tickling is a kink, something that turns them on but is not needed to have a normally functioning sex life. For others, they can't function without tickling / feet / etc. Sounds like you fall somewhere between the two.

Does your girlfriend know that this turns you on and if so, is she aware of how deep it goes?

It may seem like a weird or uncommon thing, but tickling is by far nothing to be ashamed of kink-wise. In future relationships, perhaps broaching the subject early (before people start catching feelings) in a nonchalant way and gauging your partner's reaction may be your best bet. Pretend like you're not ashamed of it. Fake it til you make it. Appearing nervous or embarrassed tends to temper the conversation negatively. It's always going to feel weird to bring up, but it will get easier the more you do it. I'd also avoid the word 'fetish' (vanillas tend to equate that with mental illness). That way, it will be easier for both to determine if they are cool with it or not and if they want to continue the relationship. When people wait until they are serious with one another to discuss sexual compatibility, it's usually a million times harder. You've developed deep feelings for a person, the pressure multiplies tenfold, there's more fear about losing the other, etc.

Granted, not everyone is going to be into it. That's life. Not everyone is compatible or gets along. Most relationships, even successful ones that last years, usually end at some point, but communication is key. If someone can't express why they are not into something without being cruel, is that someone you really want to be in a romantic relationship with? Or any kind of relationship, for that matter?

Shame leads to repression which leads to obsession and all sorts of negative feelings. Basically, people tend to keep themselves from what they get off on and make themselves feel shitty for no real reason. It's kind of sad, but I mean, it's just tickling. There are people out there that like shoving ginger up their ass or being pissed on. Let's be real lol

Remember, you're worthy of happiness. You're not a bad person because you're into something that feels or seems 'weird'. It's not weird.

Good luck with everything and stop stressing yourself out.

 

[piyr]

Nothing to be ashamed of. Talk to a qualified counselor. http://www.asect.net/