From the Home Office in Fon-du-Lac, Wisconsin
The Top Five Reasons August Spies Hasn't Been Around Lately:
#5. Strained his typing arm's shoulder muscle by reaching for a justification of his assertion that "Anarchy is order".
#4. Had to take an extra night job to defray costs for printing all his Anti-Capitalism buttons, bumper stickers, banners and t-shirts.
#3. Away in Central America, valiantly leading the Anarchist forces in battle against the deadly Stormtroopers and Armored Divisions of the Coca-Cola Company, preventing them from harvesting Coke's Secret Ingredient, which is of course the innocent blood of oppressed workers.
#2. Head exploded from the cognitive dissonance caused when someone pointed out the irony of his using the advanced technology of the internet to coordinate a worldwide effort to fight Globalization and Industrialization.
And the Number One Reason August Spies hasn't been posting much here lately...
#1. Forced to admit that he really had no interest in tickling and found another random Internet community to pester with Fringe-Politics spam posting.
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