Bad news

[kopfhorer]

Tomorrow I'm going to the funeral of one of the oddest but sweetest guys I've ever known. Tonight, I may be going to his wake. Damn, but I hope it's not an open-casket ceremony. I'm not putting down anyone's burial customs. I just don't know if I can take seeing his face inside of a casket.

Dan passed away earlier this week, in his sleep. I suppose there are worse ways to go. He was a DJ at the local college radio station where I volunteer. He played 3 hours a week of polkas. He had quite a listener base. Hell, he made polkas hip for people who wouldn't touch anything but rock! He was a retired teacher. He was intense. I could barely take his intensity, which is why I never spent much time with him (and quite frankly avoided him sometimes!). But he was friendly, make no mistake. Whenever he saw me, I was guaranteed a smile and an ultra-firm handshake (don't crush my hand please Dan, OK?).

I know there are folks here and elsewhere who've lost or who may lose people much, much closer to them (hell, I have too). Like I said, I was never that close to this guy. Still, it makes me really sad to think that I'm never going to see his ear-to-ear smile again, never going to witness that staring-right-into-the-sun intensity, or experience that ultra-firm handshake ever again.

 

[Bugman]

Sorry to hear this Kopfhorer. Sometimes, people we are not that close to touch our lives in ways we don't understand until they are gone.

 

[c7_assassin]

Losing a friend can be worse than losing family. I'm sorry for your loss.

 

[Snail Shell]

Sorry to hear this man. All the best.

SS

 

[kopfhorer]

Sorry to hear this Kopfhorer. Sometimes, people we are not that close to touch our lives in ways we don't understand until they are gone.

Ain't that the truth. I've sure found that out.

Losing a friend can be worse than losing family...

That's an indisputable fact too. Hell, I still haven't quite gotten over the passing of an ex who I haven't seen in several years. The human mind does indeed work in mysterious ways.

Oh, well, the only thing worse than losing friends is not having any.

Sorry to hear this man. All the best.

Thanks, Snail Shell.

Thank you all.

 

[Speedbump]

One thing about seeing a dead body at a funeral is that they generally look peaceful. Much more peaceful than anyone still living. I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case in whatever comes after.

It wasn't as hard to see a dead body of a loved one as I originally thought it would be. But the sight never fades from your mind.

Either way, it's better to use the opportunity to mourn, than it is to try and avoid. You'll only feel worse in the end for it if you don't do it. Good luck with everything!

 

[venray]

I am very sorry to hear of your loss Bro...Tracy and I will hold you in our thoughts...

 

[texastickler]

Sorry for your loss.

 

[CrystalLight]

Death seems to be the only time when you really start remembering a person. Regardless of how well you knew them.

I'm sorry for your loss.

 

[kopfhorer]

One thing about seeing a dead body at a funeral is that they generally look peaceful. Much more peaceful than anyone still living. I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case in whatever comes after.

Went to the funeral today. We were asked to view the body in the casket (open casket ceremony) in order to pay our final respects. We did so. It was not pleasant. Maybe it was our viewing angle, maybe it was something else. Let us just say that I'd much rather remember him the way I saw him a few days before getting the bad news.

...But the sight never fades from your mind.

You got that right. I first found that out when I arrived at the hospital only a few minutes after my own father passed.

Either way, it's better to use the opportunity to mourn, than it is to try and avoid. You'll only feel worse in the end for it if you don't do it. Good luck with everything!

Thanks. I definitely hear that. I knew if I didn't go to the funeral, it would end up being just another page in my catalogue of personal regrets.

I'm up way past my abnormal bedtime. I feel kind of like a speed freak. I think I take any kind of loss really hard, but more about that later.

I am very sorry to hear of your loss Bro...Tracy and I will hold you in our thoughts...

Thanks. Much appreciated.

Sorry for your loss.

Thanks again. Also much appreciated.

Death seems to be the only time when you really start remembering a person. Regardless of how well you knew them.

No joke. You take someone almost for granted, and then you get gobsmacked by fate.

Thanks once more.

(BTW, here's the example given by Urbandictionary.com when I double-checked that word to make sure it was the right one:

Completely dumbfounded, shocked. From the Irish word "gob" meaning "mouth".

"We were utterly gobsmacked when we spotted John at a restaurant on Friday night, after having attended his funeral that very morning!"

Who says there are no coincidences?)

 

[Bugman]

Went to the funeral today. We were asked to view the body in the casket (open casket ceremony) in order to pay our final respects. We did so. It was not pleasant. Maybe it was our viewing angle, maybe it was something else. Let us just say that I'd much rather remember him the way I saw him a few days before getting the bad news.

I lost my father in 1982 and a brother in 2000, and know how you feel. It is very difficult to get through. When my dear old friend Don passed in 2005 there was no viewing (he was cremated) and, in a way, that made it a bit easier. Don was one of those "bulletproof" people who we thought would always be around, but he was 53 when he left us. I miss all of them very much.

 

[kopfhorer]

Don was one of those "bulletproof" people who we thought would always be around, but he was 53 when he left us. I miss all of them very much.

Oh, do I hear that! Seems it's always the one(s) you never expect it to happen to.

Dan was one of those folks who functioned like he was permanently locked in overdrive (not a workaholic, just a high-energy kind of fella). I figured that even if he died now, it'd probably take him at least another 5 years to stop moving!