"blushing bride" is there still such a thing?

[melanie2]

while exercising earlier today, i was listening to the radio..and a line stood out..from the Foo Fighter's latest song.. "a man and his blushing bride" or some such thing..and i thought...is there such a thing anymore as a blushing bride? are there any out there that will wait until they are married? i waited..of course that was thirty odd years ago and times have changed..when i was in highschool for instance..there were the nice girls, and the fast girls..i was a nice girl of course :ggrin: lol..but one of my best friends was in the fast crowd..

so hmm is it archaic? is blushing bride a thing of the past? for me it was just how i felt..my best friend in college and i had made a pact that we would wait until our wedding night..she didn't wait lol..

 

[Cbarton]

They are still out there. Many churches, like ours, promote the "True Love Waits" program. Less emotional baggage that way...

 

[Lulu1]

I'm gonna wait. Not sure if I'll be -blushing-... Heck at the rate I'm not sure if I'll ever get married. XD

 

[Violetta]

I think less and less importance will be put on waiting until marriage as sexual education continues and the mystique around such a simple thing is torn down. The human creature becomes capable and active during its teenage years, and the desires felt at that time can't be denied. I didn't wait, and I don't regret it. Morality aside, this is a time in which the institution of marriage is meaning less and less, and the view of a natural process as wrong is waning. And I'm all about the change.

 

[Senshi1]

..and the view of a natural process as wrong is waning. And I'm all about the change.

I'm very very much in agreement of this. It astounds me sometimes to see so much uproar about sex and nudity, especially on TV, when things like bad language, violence, drugs etc are getting by a lot lighter.

Although it saddens me to think that some people believe marriage is less meaningful than it was.

 

[Duke Diablo]

Although it saddens me to think that some people believe marriage is less meaningful than it was.

Well, to me, marriage is just a written letter. I believe that, if two people really love each other, married or not is all the same. You can commit yourself to someone without that official thingie. It's what's inside that matters. Of course, there is nothing wrong with people marrying, but that writ is really only ok if everything is working in relationship, and you're sure that is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. If those work, then you being married or not is the least of your worries.

Now as for 'blushing brides', I believe virginity is over-rated. Of course, I don't like girls who have sex with just anyone (the 'if she did it with me first time, then she probably does it with a lot more guys too' concept), but damn, sex is all about pleasure. It is a pleasant thing, so why not enjoy it?

I am a virgin, I won't shy away from it (though it's funny how virgin women are considered something of saints, and virgin men something of a losers, and women who sleeps with lots of guys a ***** and a guy who sleeps with many women 'cool', but that is a tale for another time), and it's not because I'm waiting for right one, have self-confidence issues or something like that. I just dislike one-night stands for sexual diseases (again, the above-mentioned concept), while finding a relationship just doesn't work for me (I avoid relationships at all costs). However, I am very pro-sex and against waiting for marriage to occur before it. One of the reasons, besides not believing in marriage as institution and believing human beings should listen to their urges, is because you will (hopefully) have sex in that marriage, and when it happens, what if it turns out a catastrophe? After all, sex is very important for a healthy marriage, and if you find out (too late) that things don't work there... you're in for a huge disappointment.

 

[Senshi1]

Well, to me, marriage is just a written letter. I believe that, if two people really love each other, married or not is all the same. You can commit yourself to someone without that official thingie. It's what's inside that matters. Of course, there is nothing wrong with people marrying, but that writ is really only ok if everything is working in relationship, and you're sure that is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. If those work, then you being married or not is the least of your worries.

Don't get me wrong, I understand where the true commitment lies - we've had to give the "it's just a bit of paper" speech to people a bunch of times ourselves for various reasons - but to write it off as meaningless is a shame. Even though physically it doesn't change anything, it can be very meaningful to the two people involved, as it proves to each other that you're willing to go the distance, rather than just saying you are (although I guess if someone was determined to lie they could go ahead and get married without meaning it also).

I'm not saying everyone should get married, or that people who don't get married "aren't doing it right" or anything like that, I just think it's a shame that it's being seen as more and more meaningless, rather than the security it's supposed to represent for your wife or husband.

 

[Duke Diablo]

I'm not saying everyone should get married, or that people who don't get married "aren't doing it right" or anything like that, I just think it's a shame that it's being seen as more and more meaningless, rather than the security it's supposed to represent for your wife or husband.

Well, yeah, I can see where you're coming from... but if the situation is such that a true marriage could be born out of it, both me(or you) and the other half should already feel that security.

 

[Senshi1]

Well, yeah, I can see where you're coming from... but if the situation is such that a true marriage could be born out of it, both me(or you) and the other half should already feel that security.

When the time comes, you do feel that security. 😛 But I'm a traditional person, and to finalize it by marrying seems like a nice gesture. To see the sincerity of feeling expressed in marriage, shown to family and friends as well as just the partner who feels it, being drained away, is a shame.

 

[melanie2]

if marriage is meaningless, i've just had thirty years of meaninglessness

 

[Duke Diablo]

When the time comes, you do feel that security. 😛 But I'm a traditional person, and to finalize it by marrying seems like a nice gesture. To see the sincerity of feeling expressed in marriage, shown to family and friends as well as just the partner who feels it, being drained away, is a shame.

And that's exactly what marriage is... a sort of tradition. And as such, people should concentrate more on making their relationships work than going into hasty marriages they so often do nowadays. My point is this: if it is really 'the thing', then marriage is just a formality.

And Izzy, I don't think it's about time you spend married... it's about time you spend with that person, that's what counts. Do you cherish the thirty years of being married, or thirty years of living together with your husband, in love. I believe it is the relationship you cherish, and that you'd probably spend those thirty years with that lucky man even if you were not married. After all, it's not about the written letter, it's about the relationship.

 

[NachtKreatur]

I'm still waiting. I'm in a steady relationship and we've vowed to wait until we're married (when and if we do). I don't do it just for moral and religious reasons. I want to wait for that special someone. Plus, I have a major fear of getting pregnant and if I get pregnant my whole life plans go down the drain.

 

[Senshi1]

And that's exactly what marriage is... a sort of tradition. And as such, people should concentrate more on making their relationships work than going into hasty marriages they so often do nowadays. My point is this: if it is really 'the thing', then marriage is just a formality.

And Izzy, I don't think it's about time you spend married... it's about time you spend with that person, that's what counts. Do you cherish the thirty years of being married, or thirty years of living together with your husband, in love. I believe it is the relationship you cherish, and that you'd probably spend those thirty years with that lucky man even if you were not married. After all, it's not about the written letter, it's about the relationship.

I could go all statistical regarding marriages and non-marriages, but I don't want to get unecessary. Nor am I saying that marriage is the be-all and end all - all I'm saying is that it's not the bad thing people make it out to be. It really doesnt detract from the relationship. It isn't like you get married and suddenly go all formal and insincere. Married couples can be just as sincere and loving as non-married ones, but I don't think people should disregard it as meaningless. 😛

 

[TKLVR181]

Of course there's still a thing as a blushing bride--you think senshi will be able to resist tickle-teasing me as we're standing at the alter?😀

Kidding, of course, he's more restrained than that (he'll wait until the reception XD). In all seriousness though, I agree with him--it doesn't change the love. You can get more used to each other and in a rut, but you don't HAVE to. It might take work to make that spark last, but I intend to work at it every day for the rest of my life.

~K

 

[blackmagicjack1]

In essence I agree with Sammi on this one, but marriage isn't meaningless - it just simply has the meaning you give it. For some the ceremony is all important, for others it is not. My word and intent are much more important to me than any ceremony - a promise is a promise whether made in front of god and loved ones or made just to one special person alone.

I feel marriage is more problematic do to the difference, and inflexibility, that the law gives it. The only situation where I would endorse marriage is where children are involved - but that is marriage between two adults who love each other. I personally don't think doing it for the children - enduring a loveless marriage - is beneficial to the children. It just teaches them to expect marriages to be loveless.

 

[Duke Diablo]

I could go all statistical regarding marriages and non-marriages, but I don't want to get unecessary. Nor am I saying that marriage is the be-all and end all - all I'm saying is that it's not the bad thing people make it out to be. It really doesnt detract from the relationship. It isn't like you get married and suddenly go all formal and insincere. Married couples can be just as sincere and loving as non-married ones, but I don't think people should disregard it as meaningless. 😛

Well, I'm not saying marriage lessens love... I'm just saying that, in real 'for life' relationships, it's just a formality. I'm against rushed marriages, and forced ones (which are unfortunately present even today), which are all too common amongst people.

 

[3xPIN]

Purity is neither a burden nor a blessing. Self-control is a form of character. I have had many opportinities to have sex and it is hard not to have sex. my father once asked me, "how can you have this beautiful girlfriend, and not want to do anything?" It dawned on me that no one understands why I don't have sex. It isn't because I don't want to; It is because every fiber of my being tells me that not waiting is a bad idea. And every one who has ever had sex that I have met and has had sex, held an open discussion with me about it, has helped me confirm my hypothesis! I told my father, "I want to fuck her brains out!" But she broke up with me; And even though she broke my heart, she didn't take my dick with her. And as for the subject: I plan to marry a virgin and be a virgin at the same time. But once we are married I'll be whispering things in her ear that would make a ***** blush!

Side note: marriage = union, Love = Love
and sacrifice makes all things stronger

 

[melanie2]

^ eeks..whisper them to me first please??? this i need to hear lol..

and lol i like that..she didn't take my dick lmao

 

[Cbarton]

It's all about commitment and whether you are willing to make the commitment for the long haul. Too many in the past have jumped right in to marriage to 'justify" having sex, only to realize that marriage takes WORK and COMMITMENT. Sadly, too many here in the US treat marriage like it's a recyclable container.

As people of faith, many of us look at marriage as more than just two people signing a contract, but the spiritual union of the man and the woman. We look upon it totally different than non-believers, which explains why our views of marriage and chastity are so different than the 'libertine' outlook that the current generations are promoting. In my observation, I have seen a super-majority (greater than 2/3) of couples that 'lived together' then married were divorced within 2 years. Once you make that true commitment, things change.

We are teaching our kids to wait. My wife and I waited for each other. It was worth the wait. In a real marriage, compatibility isn't instant, it grows. Marriage is a challenge, your mate a mystery to continuously be solved. It's not just add water and stir. You're making great chili, which gets better the longer it simmers. We're not talking about making a glass of Tang, folks.

 

[melanie2]

^ i like that..i know i certainly didn't marry for the sex..i wanted to spend my life with my soul mate..my true love..to be perfectly honest, sex was never a major issue in our marriage..it's ok. we are like two halves of one whole..two cups of tea..did i blush on my wedding day? frankly i can't remember..but i do remember this..he was as nervous as i was..if we had had a big wedding, he would have fainted, my mother always said..lol..i'm not sure if he was nervous about the wedding night, or nervous about what he was getting into..

i've often asked him...would he marry me again, knowing everything now that he would know then...the no children etc...he always says..in a heartbeat..

 

[3xPIN]

^ eeks..whisper them to me first please??? this i need to hear lol..

and lol i like that..she didn't take my dick lmao

well that is just It: Guy says, "she is a bitch cuz she left me!" No! you think she is a bitch cuz she won't FUCK YOU ANYMORE!

As for the things I whisper: Sorry, for my bride-to-be only. Package deal for the marriage.

 

[P[a]pi]

Meka and I are not gonna have sex until we're married because we wanna follow the Bible because we're Christians.

 

[Duke Diablo]

If you want your bride to blush on your wedding, have her wearing wide wedding dress, set a platform next to where her feet are, and slowly rise from it. Then, get out of the dress with a satisfied look on your face and zipping up the zipper. Maybe whistle a little.