moriaritytk
TMF Poster
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2001
- Messages
- 127
- Points
- 0
As the TMF matures and rockets past 3,000 members toward 30,000, we have the opportunity and the need to use this site to start hashing out more "common language" to help us talk among ourselves and connect with newcomers.
If you think about it, many of our descriptive terms were appropriated from other areas. We use a fair number of terms and concepts from B&D/SM, which makes sense, since we're an offshoot of those areas. We use the term "closeted" to describe people who hide their tickling interests, even though closeted has a very specific meaning related to sexual orientation.
I'm suggesting that we come up with some meaningful ways to categorize ourselves specifically as ticklers based on differences that might affect our tickling behavior. Since it's easier to react to a working draft than to a blank sheet of paper, I've noodled out four categories where each tickler can choose a description. Your descriptors in those four categories will then string together to form a tickling profile that will be a shorthand way of describing your general situation to others.
Sound complicated? It's not. The goal of the categorization is to simplify and clarify, and I think it will do just that. The goal ISN'T to diminish our individuality and replace it with labels. As you'll see, the categories don't specifically address tickling interests. If you favor foot tickling with hairbrushes or long nails on underarms or having an armadillo lick lime Jello off your nipples (I think there's a Yahoo Club for people with that last fetish, isn't there?), you'll still need to express those interests to others in your own way as you see fit.
Anyway, here are the categories I'm offering up for discussion:
Single OR Partnered: Single ticklers are those who aren't paired up in what they consider to be a monogamous relationship. Partnered ticklers are connected in some way to a specific person (or persons), maybe legally by marriage or maybe by living arrangements or maybe they've just traded letter jackets and class rings. This is an important distinction because your behavior will be (or should be) affected by your commitment status.
Secret OR Open: Secret ticklers have not acknowledged their interest with others. Open ticklers may still be discreet, but they acknowledge their interest with others in circumstances they consider appropriate. You can be open without your parents and golfing buddies knowing you are into tickling, but it is the kind of information you share as you become intimate with partners or potential partners.
Seeking OR Stabilized: Seeking ticklers are on the lookout for people to tickle, in or out of a relationship. Stabilized ticklers aren't currently looking for any additional real-world tickling, for whatever reason. This is a tricky but important distinction. You can be partnered and seeking. Or, you could be single and not seeking. I tried hard to come up with categories that don't carry clear religious or moral connotations. For example, "tickle sluts" and "tickle celibates" didn't seem quite right. The goal is to help clarify situations without weighing us down with value judgements about our situations. That's tough, since the language is filled with words that are weighted with good and bad connotations.
Self-Gratifying OR Indulged: Self-gratifying ticklers handle the majority of any tickling related "releases" themselves. They may have plenty of on non-tickling sexual experience with partners, but they don't generally involve partners in their tickling activities. Indulged ticklers have a partner or partners that allows them to carry out tickling activities in such a way that it triggers a release for them. What's a "release?" Certainly, there are sexual releases, but I want to avoid limiting the descriptions to that realm. Plenty of folks participate in non-sexual tickling during which their "release" is some feeling of satisfaction or control or whatever. You have to decide what counts as a release for you.
OK. Now that we have the working categories, here's how to use them. Just look through each pair and pick the descriptor that best applies to you and string them together. Here"s an example:
Single, Secret, Seeking, Self-Gratifying: This is pretty much how everyone starts out. Lots of people never move beyond this stage. Some never want to. This profile fits nearly all the college folks who are dating around but have never openly told a date or sex partner about their tickling interest. If you made me guess, I'd say that this profile may apply to the highest percentage of the people on the TMF.
Now that you see how it works, let"s take this parlor game a step further and apply it to some real people. I'm going to pick the famous TicklingDuo of Ann and Drew, because most people on this site have encountered them and their situation seems pretty clear. I'm guessing that each of them is Partnered, Open, Seeking, Indulged. We can be pretty sure from their public comments about everything but the "seeking" designation. They both seem to be up for additional tickling experiences, but that's not something I can decide. That's why you have to come up with your profile on your own rather than have someone else assign it. And, you have to keep it up to date as your situation changes.
Why would we want to share our profiles? Well, mainly because it is a really fast way to deliver valuable information. If a female on the forum lists herself as "partnered" and "stabilized" that should be a pretty clear signal to all but the most brainless males that she's here for learning and conversation but doesn't want to be hit on. Without her profile, you might not be sure how to behave toward her. With her profile, you can quickly weed out those inappropriate invitations to meet you on the top of the Empire State Building on Valentine's Day with handcuffs and a feather duster.
Sharing our profiles can also help us be role models for others. Let's try another real person here--everybody's favorite Star Wars Tickle Author, Dave 2112. I'll go out on a limb . . . make that a light saber, and guess that Dave is Single, Open, Seeking, Indulged. Let's say some guy who comes to the TMF and thinks Dave is pretty cool (hey, it could happen) now has some critical information to compare his profile to Dave's. If he's still a "secret", that's a good indicator that he aren't likely to achieve any of his dreams of tickling glory until he makes the big leap to being open like Dave is. My gut feeling is that we will find the "open" people to be much more upbeat and rational about their tickling interest. If so, that will be good information for newcomers to learn.
How can we share our profiles? I can think of three ways. We could load the four appropriate descriptors into out members profiles. That way, it's behind the scenes, but anybody could click you profile (that sounds vaguely sexy, doesn't it?) and check you out. Or, we could include our profiles in our signature blocks along with the funky quotes that people favor. Or, you could just include one or more of your profile categories in a post when you think that aspect is relevant to the discussion topic.
Anyhow, that's my suggestion. Sorry it wasn't very scintillating (although, admit it, that image of the armadillo licking the lime Jello is sticking in some of your minds) but sometimes there are items that we need to hash out so out future discussions about tickling can be more productive.
Comments, questions and alternative ideas are welcome. I'm not the category sheriff here, just an old timer who has seen a lot of tickler organizing efforts come undone over the years. I want to promote some the organizational structure elements that will help make this forum the definitive group for the future.
Speak up about the ideas. Even better, figure out your own profile and share it in response to see if that feels like a good thing to do or not.
If you think about it, many of our descriptive terms were appropriated from other areas. We use a fair number of terms and concepts from B&D/SM, which makes sense, since we're an offshoot of those areas. We use the term "closeted" to describe people who hide their tickling interests, even though closeted has a very specific meaning related to sexual orientation.
I'm suggesting that we come up with some meaningful ways to categorize ourselves specifically as ticklers based on differences that might affect our tickling behavior. Since it's easier to react to a working draft than to a blank sheet of paper, I've noodled out four categories where each tickler can choose a description. Your descriptors in those four categories will then string together to form a tickling profile that will be a shorthand way of describing your general situation to others.
Sound complicated? It's not. The goal of the categorization is to simplify and clarify, and I think it will do just that. The goal ISN'T to diminish our individuality and replace it with labels. As you'll see, the categories don't specifically address tickling interests. If you favor foot tickling with hairbrushes or long nails on underarms or having an armadillo lick lime Jello off your nipples (I think there's a Yahoo Club for people with that last fetish, isn't there?), you'll still need to express those interests to others in your own way as you see fit.
Anyway, here are the categories I'm offering up for discussion:
Single OR Partnered: Single ticklers are those who aren't paired up in what they consider to be a monogamous relationship. Partnered ticklers are connected in some way to a specific person (or persons), maybe legally by marriage or maybe by living arrangements or maybe they've just traded letter jackets and class rings. This is an important distinction because your behavior will be (or should be) affected by your commitment status.
Secret OR Open: Secret ticklers have not acknowledged their interest with others. Open ticklers may still be discreet, but they acknowledge their interest with others in circumstances they consider appropriate. You can be open without your parents and golfing buddies knowing you are into tickling, but it is the kind of information you share as you become intimate with partners or potential partners.
Seeking OR Stabilized: Seeking ticklers are on the lookout for people to tickle, in or out of a relationship. Stabilized ticklers aren't currently looking for any additional real-world tickling, for whatever reason. This is a tricky but important distinction. You can be partnered and seeking. Or, you could be single and not seeking. I tried hard to come up with categories that don't carry clear religious or moral connotations. For example, "tickle sluts" and "tickle celibates" didn't seem quite right. The goal is to help clarify situations without weighing us down with value judgements about our situations. That's tough, since the language is filled with words that are weighted with good and bad connotations.
Self-Gratifying OR Indulged: Self-gratifying ticklers handle the majority of any tickling related "releases" themselves. They may have plenty of on non-tickling sexual experience with partners, but they don't generally involve partners in their tickling activities. Indulged ticklers have a partner or partners that allows them to carry out tickling activities in such a way that it triggers a release for them. What's a "release?" Certainly, there are sexual releases, but I want to avoid limiting the descriptions to that realm. Plenty of folks participate in non-sexual tickling during which their "release" is some feeling of satisfaction or control or whatever. You have to decide what counts as a release for you.
OK. Now that we have the working categories, here's how to use them. Just look through each pair and pick the descriptor that best applies to you and string them together. Here"s an example:
Single, Secret, Seeking, Self-Gratifying: This is pretty much how everyone starts out. Lots of people never move beyond this stage. Some never want to. This profile fits nearly all the college folks who are dating around but have never openly told a date or sex partner about their tickling interest. If you made me guess, I'd say that this profile may apply to the highest percentage of the people on the TMF.
Now that you see how it works, let"s take this parlor game a step further and apply it to some real people. I'm going to pick the famous TicklingDuo of Ann and Drew, because most people on this site have encountered them and their situation seems pretty clear. I'm guessing that each of them is Partnered, Open, Seeking, Indulged. We can be pretty sure from their public comments about everything but the "seeking" designation. They both seem to be up for additional tickling experiences, but that's not something I can decide. That's why you have to come up with your profile on your own rather than have someone else assign it. And, you have to keep it up to date as your situation changes.
Why would we want to share our profiles? Well, mainly because it is a really fast way to deliver valuable information. If a female on the forum lists herself as "partnered" and "stabilized" that should be a pretty clear signal to all but the most brainless males that she's here for learning and conversation but doesn't want to be hit on. Without her profile, you might not be sure how to behave toward her. With her profile, you can quickly weed out those inappropriate invitations to meet you on the top of the Empire State Building on Valentine's Day with handcuffs and a feather duster.
Sharing our profiles can also help us be role models for others. Let's try another real person here--everybody's favorite Star Wars Tickle Author, Dave 2112. I'll go out on a limb . . . make that a light saber, and guess that Dave is Single, Open, Seeking, Indulged. Let's say some guy who comes to the TMF and thinks Dave is pretty cool (hey, it could happen) now has some critical information to compare his profile to Dave's. If he's still a "secret", that's a good indicator that he aren't likely to achieve any of his dreams of tickling glory until he makes the big leap to being open like Dave is. My gut feeling is that we will find the "open" people to be much more upbeat and rational about their tickling interest. If so, that will be good information for newcomers to learn.
How can we share our profiles? I can think of three ways. We could load the four appropriate descriptors into out members profiles. That way, it's behind the scenes, but anybody could click you profile (that sounds vaguely sexy, doesn't it?) and check you out. Or, we could include our profiles in our signature blocks along with the funky quotes that people favor. Or, you could just include one or more of your profile categories in a post when you think that aspect is relevant to the discussion topic.
Anyhow, that's my suggestion. Sorry it wasn't very scintillating (although, admit it, that image of the armadillo licking the lime Jello is sticking in some of your minds) but sometimes there are items that we need to hash out so out future discussions about tickling can be more productive.
Comments, questions and alternative ideas are welcome. I'm not the category sheriff here, just an old timer who has seen a lot of tickler organizing efforts come undone over the years. I want to promote some the organizational structure elements that will help make this forum the definitive group for the future.
Speak up about the ideas. Even better, figure out your own profile and share it in response to see if that feels like a good thing to do or not.
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