With such a title, I was tempted to write it out as Gatherings, Theme and Play Parties *vs.* Munches. Munches, unlike the initial three, are the only kind commonly done that have a public location. I'm starting another series of them for those folks too shy to meet in private residences, and it occured to me that this topic hasn't been touched HERE before, and it's been ages since it was touched on AMT or it's earlier iterations.
Yeah, it's a bit of a lesson, and the old school kids will not learn a thing, likely. Heck, I expect at least two of my moderating cohorts to jump in with whatever I might forget (Kuj, Mia - that's you).
WHAT'S A GATHERING?
Unlike the rest of the terms, which are all old-school bondage community terms, the term "Gatherings" was somethin' I pulled outta nowhere to define an event where we could get together in a home or rented space, privately, to meet, and potentially to play, in a milder format than a play party.
WHAT'S A PLAY PARTY?
More to the point, here, what's the difference between a gathering and a play party? First off, a play party, as I learned it ages ago, is a social event for bdsm play among consenting partners. This means there's no non-participants, and that everyone is comfortable with the play at hand, or adult enough to turn a head away from what's unappealing. The difference between this, and a gathering, is largely in the play. A Play Party, whether themed, as Kujman so adroitly executes, or not, such as a few of the West Coast events of years past, has more focused and serious bondage and/or domination play, and the players are expected to know to clue their play partners to their safewords, and to negotiate their limits. Where some folks at Gatherings never play, such would be positively rude at a play party. It'd be like attending someone's dinner party and not dining. You attend a play party to play.
SO WHY HAVE MUNCHES?
If I have gatherings, with guaranteed play at each, why have munches? For me, it's social responsibility. How else will those that are shy have the chance to meet the others, and the possibility of feeling safe in playing with them? Sure, coercion is possible, but it's ethically challenged, even if you MEAN well. It's much easier to simply invite folks out to meet at a local pub or bar, and socialize for a few hours. Having multiple events, one a month, means that some of the 70 names on my list of attendees might actually feel safe in coming out to gatherings, and meeting the other 50+ folks that HAVE attended. Munches are social events in predefined public places during common business hours. Yes, talkin' our kink is somethin' you may find slightly embarrassing, but when you're with a group of 5-12 people, all talking the same topic, it's hard to be embarrassed.
The first West Coast Gathering event was actually a munch.
If you want to meet others into this, it's easiest when you know others into this, and don't feel odd for having your interest. Your interest is interesting to many more people than you realize, and knowing that, empirically, makes you much more comfortable with those folks that have no notion of our interest. Want to get more comfortable with your interest, and feel like this forum isn't all some digital machination of a handful of the digerati? Come to a munch. Get to where you're familiar with some of us.
Then, when you want to attend a gathering or play party, you won't feel so awkward, and will also have the benefit of new friends to ask about such things.
<BLATANT PLUG> There's a munch in the Santa Clara valley in California on 9/17. Contact [email protected] to attend. </BLATANT PLUG>
If you've an interest in the more casual gatherings, there's the West Coast Gatherings in California, Nevada and Oregon, the MidWest NEST in Ohio, NEST and the newly created Hyena's Den in Pennsylvania, some CHESTs in Illinois, NYST in New York, and the Southern Gatherings in the southern US (last held in Louisiana during Mardi Gras). More serious play parties are at some CHESTs and West Coast Gatherings, and at Kujman's Themed Events. I'm sure there are others, but *sniff* I've not heard of them. 😉
Alright, Mia, Kuj, others, what'd I forget. I really want to see this board's readers get familiar with the "rules", as we did way back when. School 'em where I forgot to do so myself, please.
dvnc
Yeah, it's a bit of a lesson, and the old school kids will not learn a thing, likely. Heck, I expect at least two of my moderating cohorts to jump in with whatever I might forget (Kuj, Mia - that's you).
WHAT'S A GATHERING?
Unlike the rest of the terms, which are all old-school bondage community terms, the term "Gatherings" was somethin' I pulled outta nowhere to define an event where we could get together in a home or rented space, privately, to meet, and potentially to play, in a milder format than a play party.
WHAT'S A PLAY PARTY?
More to the point, here, what's the difference between a gathering and a play party? First off, a play party, as I learned it ages ago, is a social event for bdsm play among consenting partners. This means there's no non-participants, and that everyone is comfortable with the play at hand, or adult enough to turn a head away from what's unappealing. The difference between this, and a gathering, is largely in the play. A Play Party, whether themed, as Kujman so adroitly executes, or not, such as a few of the West Coast events of years past, has more focused and serious bondage and/or domination play, and the players are expected to know to clue their play partners to their safewords, and to negotiate their limits. Where some folks at Gatherings never play, such would be positively rude at a play party. It'd be like attending someone's dinner party and not dining. You attend a play party to play.
SO WHY HAVE MUNCHES?
If I have gatherings, with guaranteed play at each, why have munches? For me, it's social responsibility. How else will those that are shy have the chance to meet the others, and the possibility of feeling safe in playing with them? Sure, coercion is possible, but it's ethically challenged, even if you MEAN well. It's much easier to simply invite folks out to meet at a local pub or bar, and socialize for a few hours. Having multiple events, one a month, means that some of the 70 names on my list of attendees might actually feel safe in coming out to gatherings, and meeting the other 50+ folks that HAVE attended. Munches are social events in predefined public places during common business hours. Yes, talkin' our kink is somethin' you may find slightly embarrassing, but when you're with a group of 5-12 people, all talking the same topic, it's hard to be embarrassed.
The first West Coast Gathering event was actually a munch.
If you want to meet others into this, it's easiest when you know others into this, and don't feel odd for having your interest. Your interest is interesting to many more people than you realize, and knowing that, empirically, makes you much more comfortable with those folks that have no notion of our interest. Want to get more comfortable with your interest, and feel like this forum isn't all some digital machination of a handful of the digerati? Come to a munch. Get to where you're familiar with some of us.
Then, when you want to attend a gathering or play party, you won't feel so awkward, and will also have the benefit of new friends to ask about such things.
<BLATANT PLUG> There's a munch in the Santa Clara valley in California on 9/17. Contact [email protected] to attend. </BLATANT PLUG>
If you've an interest in the more casual gatherings, there's the West Coast Gatherings in California, Nevada and Oregon, the MidWest NEST in Ohio, NEST and the newly created Hyena's Den in Pennsylvania, some CHESTs in Illinois, NYST in New York, and the Southern Gatherings in the southern US (last held in Louisiana during Mardi Gras). More serious play parties are at some CHESTs and West Coast Gatherings, and at Kujman's Themed Events. I'm sure there are others, but *sniff* I've not heard of them. 😉
Alright, Mia, Kuj, others, what'd I forget. I really want to see this board's readers get familiar with the "rules", as we did way back when. School 'em where I forgot to do so myself, please.
dvnc
