GOLF?!?!
Ah memories....
I remember this one time a couple years ago. I was sleeping peacefully in my bed when a band of about 45 hostile freaks broke into my house. They made caffiene-free tea, folded my lanudry, and dusted everything, removing any trace of a fingerprints or life. They blasted their insane polka music and crocheted argyle socks while I peeked form behind my door at the scene that brought horror to my mind.
The next thing I know they were upon me like a pack of hungry wolves on fresh meat! They bound me and gagged me...tied me to a chair and placed me in front of a tv! Then they turned on....GOLF!!!! AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOO!!!!! NOT GOLF!!!!!!!!
In whispers and light breath, behind me, they conversed about the ball, the cup...the slope..the green! I couldn't take it! I tried to gnaw off my ears to avoid the horror.....fruitless endeavor! I finally blocked out the pain by building up enough tears to blur the sight and crying so loudly I could nothing but my own sobbing. Hours went by...HOURS I SAY!! Then then left me...tired and weak.
Thank GOD for that rugby player who came by that morning. He loosed my ropes and set me free from my bondage...and I was alive...I WAS ALIVE!
Joby. 😛