How not to find a play partner

[karmagirl70]

"Basically mine would look like the most boring and uncreative thing you have ever seen. I'm dull and unimaginative. So sue me."

I read this in another thread and then began to wonder with stuff like this out there, why do people wonder why it's difficult to find play partners? The above is referring to bondage.

I don't see anyone raising their hand and saying "pick me" "pick me."

Sorry to be so opinionated but this sort of thing just irks me. If all you want to do is tie someone up as quickly as possible and go after them - how do you not bore YOURSELF?

I'm willing to hear another take on this. What am I missing? Why is this ok?

 

[dude123]

You're right, it's not really okay. There are way too many people who create awkward situations by being so...monochromatic.

 

[Mash]

*facepalm* Thank you.

She asked for my opinion, and I gave it. I don't expect to find a play partner, nor was I complaining about it.
You're also putting a lot of words into my mouth. I did not say I would just 'go after them'. Plus, it's not really about what's right and what's wrong; this is my life, not yours. If I want it to be boring and crappy, then it'll be boring and crappy.

Don't see what my lack of kinky tendencies has to do with my quality of life, anyways.

 

[hazelf1]

"Basically mine would look like the most boring and uncreative thing you have ever seen. I'm dull and unimaginative. So sue me."

I read this in another thread and then began to wonder with stuff like this out there, why do people wonder why it's difficult to find play partners? The above is referring to bondage.

I don't see anyone raising their hand and saying "pick me" "pick me."

Sorry to be so opinionated but this sort of thing just irks me. If all you want to do is tie someone up as quickly as possible and go after them - how do you not bore YOURSELF?

I'm willing to hear another take on this. What am I missing? Why is this ok?

Hey

Welcome to the site relax and enjoy yourself, its ok here and folks are ok, if your ok with them, not sure where that first line is from it rings a bell.

My basic take is that tickling is all things to all people, in my case tickling involves a tieing element, and iam mainly ler, so there is a control element,also iam bi and for me it envolves a sensual/erotic element, iam 30% lee and like to let my victims get revenge,it improves my methods.

So that lot is ok for me, but others just want a simple basic tickling situation with no fetish at all so its a case of whats right for you.

I think you have to lurk at first see whats said and what happens then get involved feel free to look at my profile and stuff i have uploaded, you may well not like it, but its a aspect of tickling.

Tickling should be fun and enjoyment, most people are in beween my extreme and basic tickling, there are so many variations.

What the persons saying there is a reply to what someone has said, without the full thing it makes little sense.

Nothing wrong with bondage in tickling, nothing wrong if its not there it what is good for both parties, i revlolve my stuff around the lee some people do opposite.

My idea being as long as iam tickling fine, but if the lee isn't happy then all is wasted.

By posting this thread at least you are taking part and having a go, a lot of people come on here and never say or do anything, so glad to see you taking part.

 

[karmagirl70]

*facepalm* Thank you.

She asked for my opinion, and I gave it. I don't expect to find a play partner, nor was I complaining about it.
You're also putting a lot of words into my mouth. I did not say I would just 'go after them'. Plus, it's not really about what's right and what's wrong; this is my life, not yours. If I want it to be boring and crappy, then it'll be boring and crappy.

Don't see what my lack of kinky tendencies has to do with my quality of life, anyways.

You must be the person who typed this- I wasn't intending to "out" you or anything and of course if you want it to be boring and crappy that's great. I was just using your words as an example of what seems to be typical in the TK world today- at the same time that people bitch that they can't find people into it. That's all 🙂

 

[karmagirl70]

Hey

Welcome to the site relax and enjoy yourself, its ok here and folks are ok, if your ok with them, not sure where that first line is from it rings a bell.

My basic take is that tickling is all things to all people, in my case tickling involves a tieing element, and iam mainly ler, so there is a control element,also iam bi and for me it envolves a sensual/erotic element, iam 30% lee and like to let my victims get revenge,it improves my methods.

So that lot is ok for me, but others just want a simple basic tickling situation with no fetish at all so its a case of whats right for you.

I think you have to lurk at first see whats said and what happens then get involved feel free to look at my profile and stuff i have uploaded, you may well not like it, but its a aspect of tickling.

Tickling should be fun and enjoyment, most people are in beween my extreme and basic tickling, there are so many variations.

What the persons saying there is a reply to what someone has said, without the full thing it makes little sense.

Nothing wrong with bondage in tickling, nothing wrong if its not there it what is good for both parties, i revlolve my stuff around the lee some people do opposite.

My idea being as long as iam tickling fine, but if the lee isn't happy then all is wasted.

By posting this thread at least you are taking part and having a go, a lot of people come on here and never say or do anything, so glad to see you taking part.

Thanks for your perspective Hazel. I guess I did come off as a newbie. Not so much. I've been around the "scene" for quite a long time. Just have been offline for a few years after getting kind of bored with what I read..and was finding in real life.

And sure, tickling is all things to all things to all people - what isn't?

I have respect for what anyone wants to do. I just think a lot of people spend a lot of time whining without thinking how to make it better. Nothing personal to the OP I quoted because I wasn't really picking on him/her..just using the words to show what I think is a prevailing attitude of laziness and lack of desire to create something REAL.

It sounds like you've found your niche, created for yourself what you want. That's what you have to do to be happy. Can't just sit around and bitch if you're not willing to make something happen for yourself.

Cheers 🙂

 

[Mash]

You must be the person who typed this- I wasn't intending to "out" you or anything and of course if you want it to be boring and crappy that's great. I was just using your words as an example of what seems to be typical in the TK world today- at the same time that people bitch that they can't find people into it. That's all 🙂

Well, if that's all you meant, then I won't take offense. I just don't like being outed. I mean, I think I'm a pretty plain and average person. I just don't crave for some of the more...exotic things.

The reason I haven't 'found' anyone is because there's nobody here to be found. I live in a town of 700 people, 30 miles from the nearest city.

Sorry if I kind of bit your head off, I get like that when I feel like I'm being singled out.

 

[hazelf1]

Thanks for your perspective Hazel. I guess I did come off as a newbie. Not so much. I've been around the "scene" for quite a long time. Just have been offline for a few years after getting kind of bored with what I read..and was finding in real life.

And sure, tickling is all things to all things to all people - what isn't?

I have respect for what anyone wants to do. I just think a lot of people spend a lot of time whining without thinking how to make it better. Nothing personal to the OP I quoted because I wasn't really picking on him/her..just using the words to show what I think is a prevailing attitude of laziness and lack of desire to create something REAL.

It sounds like you've found your niche, created for yourself what you want. That's what you have to do to be happy. Can't just sit around and bitch if you're not willing to make something happen for yourself.

Cheers 🙂

Thanks for the nice comments, sorry if i seems patronising it was not my intention.

I try to be a bit creative around the lees needs if you get chance and time have a look at some of the threads on here about tickling, lots of questions have been raised, debated and answered, you could trace some from my profile, on this site people do respond to posts in general.

 

[PurpleStyle]

I've got a better line of reasoning: many people here don't seem terribly interested in meeting others for... whatever. Sorry, but a great deal of the people here are just interested in cybering.

If your interest is actually meeting people, try Fetlife or the Tickling Media Forum. Then of course, there's always going outside of the house and meeting people on one's own accord without looking on a forum.

 

[Dr. Bill Kobb]

No offense to the OP, but I think they were taking Mash16's comment too seriously? I just understood it in it's original context to be a lil' self-deprecating humor(?). Perhaps if Karmagirl had posted in the original "Your Perfect Bondage"-thread herself, I'd understand her dismay? But to single somebody out for one glib afterthought? Eh?

As far as meeting people from the Theater? We all visit for different reasons. I currently got no tickling going on beyond playful goofing with friends/loved ones. So, it's nice to pop in here and chit-chat about stuff with others with at least the love of tickling in common. The important thing for all to realize is, beyond that one topic, you'll meet people with widely divergent viewpoints. There's plenty of people on here that I'd happily hang out with for a day or whatever, even if we have strongly opposing views on politics or religion, or some other big subject.

(The second paragraph was just me summing up my feelings about online communities after reading Purple's thoughts.)

 

[Inverse]

I'm trying to find out how creativity in bondage correlates to meeting play partners~ I never knew knowing how to make a dozen variation of knots made it that much easier.

Fetlife is definitely a good place to start meeting people~ beyond which you actually have to want to meet. There are definitely people out there~ I doubt your imaginative methods for tying people up will be a catalyst to your actually doing so though. <3

Most come to Tickletheater to just be around people that enjoy the topic~ without needing to introduce ourselves or explain why we enjoy it. It's good to elaborate on why since even amongst tickling lovers~ we can be very, very different in why we enjoy it so much. I come here to write, read and see people have fun enjoying something they may not really get a chance to do that often. Out of all the things I do online, this is the most secretive and the most niche of them all. One of the smallest communities I'm a part of, and by that token, one of the most important to me as well.

If I could meet even one person here, for play or otherwise~ it'd be fantastic, if only to see if I could actually stop blushing anytime I hear the word tickle come from someone's lips. ><

 

[likeasong1]

If your interest is actually meeting people, try Fetlife or the Tickling Media Forum. Then of course, there's always going outside of the house and meeting people on one's own accord without looking on a forum.

Heretic

 

[karmagirl70]

W
Sorry if I kind of bit your head off, I get like that when I feel like I'm being singled out.

Totally reasonable. That's actually why I didn't put it in that other thread (which I didn't start by the way) or include your name. Probably should have just paraphrased it or something. 🙂 Live and learn.

 

[Kujman1]

I think this thread went off-target.

The truth is, most people would love to have a partner in TK. In fact as I believe Karma was getting at, that's what most bitch about- they can't find anyone.

The reason being there's not many ladies into this. And the reason for that is the often uncreative, lazy, complacency that has infested TK overall (NOT directed at the original OP!)

Take a look at videos-- It's now a fetish of "Yeah, yeah yeah.. I know it's fake, but hey, she's got nice boobs, so let's just pretend it's real so we don't have to breal a sweat and thats good enough"

The same has swayed over into RT meetings.

Really- it isn't good enough. We can do better. But few want to put out the effort. The bondage is fake, the TK boring.. so are the personalities who post and offer the same threads over and over.

The Internet ruined the TK fetish- but is still the easiest way to meet others of your ilk, yett so many sign on, find TK, see the crap out there, and run. Females enjoy the mental aspect, guys like visual (fast, cheap, & easy).

IMO--if you don't capture the mind- the body won't follow! It's that simple. And also that hard.