how I understand it...
The female members here get messages every day from people who are interested in being pen pals (and more). Occasionally those people are great, interesting people. That means there is rarely a need for them to come to the Pen Pals section to look for someone else, unless they are looking for something specific (like someone to dress up as a clown and throw water balloons at them while tickling them 😀 ). Their needs are already being met -- coming directly to them, in fact.
So I'd recommend directly PM'ing people who interest you. Not out of the blue. Wait until you can comment on something they wrote in the forums. Say something of substance, and be sincere. It's helped me open up to people a few times so far.
Meeting people in the chat has been moderately successful too, though the ratio is so heavily skewed there that it's very hard. (Not that there aren't interesting guys there -- and I do like talking to cool guys too. But... it's different, in a way).
If you're going to leave a post in the Pen Pals section, I would say to just be very clear about what you're interested in, and especially what makes you different than everyone else. You're more likely to get attention that way, than if you're just a generic friendly guy looking to talk to someone. That's what I figure anyway.
It might also help to say what your other interests are. After all, it's hard to carry on a conversation just about tickling. It's good to have a list of topics you can talk about with someone.
I've heard it said that it helps to have testimonials on your personals from people who know you and can vouch that you're a cool person. So, ask your friends to write nice things about you, and in exchange you can write nice things about them. 🙂 (especially testimonials from women, of course, since women are your target audience).
Finally, I've been told that it helps to just be active in the community, and contribute. Let people become familiar with your name. Write stories. Help out new people. Etc... Maybe even visit a gathering and make real life friends. Then, when you're a big part of the community, and have friends here, your posts in these sections will get a lot more attention.
Just my 2 cents, as a new person who's trying to figure this place out. Hopefully this will help you.
