Is it wrong?

[mikepd]

So my grandfather is 85 and had a stroke. He is on his deathbed. I'm not even really that upset. I guess I seen it coming. My question is why am I not more upset?

 

[Rox_My_Sox1]

Everyone grieves in their own way. You will morn his death in your own fashion. Just remember to concentrate on all the good and wonderful memories you had of him. Keep those memories close to your heart and your Grandpa will always be with ya. ^_^

 

[Journia]

You may just not be affected by death in that way. Heck, when some people die, I giggle actually. I honestly find it funny. I'm not bad, I just react that way.

So, no, you're not bad.

 

[Cbarton]

Don't worry about it. As Rox stated, we all deal with death in different ways.

It probably depends on (1) how close you are to him emotionally and (2) how much you've already dealt with it. If you knew it was coming, as I did with my father, it's not as big a shock and such. When he does die, it will hit you again. Trust me. It will happen.

 

[AdamN]

Sometimes these things don't really hit you until later. Then again, it might not. It doesn't mean you don't love your grandfather. Some people just don't get emotional. My grandfather passed away back in 2006, and my dad (his eldest son) was seemingly unable to get emotional, at least around us. I don't recall seeing him shed one tear, even though I knew he was sad. As others have said, if it saddens you, you will grieve in your own way.

 

[kopfhorer1]

Alison Bechdel, in her graphic memoir "Fun Home" recounted how she and her brother giggled almost uncontrollably just before her father's funeral. She wasn't showing disrespect (much of the memoir is respectful recollections about her father).

In any case, I hear you. No, you aren't bad. Some people react the way you're doing because it just doesn't seem real. And I offer my sincerest respects to your grandfather.

 

[QueenBeeBeeMari]

I don't know,some people just don't get affected that way.At my Grandma's funeral I was prancing around handing tissues to people and couldn't understand what all the crying was for then,again I was 7yrs.old.I also made time to enjoy the food but I do that at every funeral and get upset if there isn't any food.I'm just crazy like that.Then,my elementary guidance counselor showed up at a funeral cheerful as any other day.So,people just handle things differently.Just do things your way that's all you can do.Sorry for your loss.

 

[melanie2]

He's not dead yet guys...and if he's had a stroke..he's suffering, poor guy...*shrugs*...grief comes in stages..you will experience them eventually...i didn't cry until months later after mom's death..except for the initial reaction when i was told she just went and i burst into tears because i was too late..

 

[TKLVR181]

Everybody grieves in their own way--and it might be that, since you seem to have seen it coming, you've already come to terms with it. There's nothing wrong with the way you're feeling.

~K

 

[Janus4385]

It is different reactions for different people as others have already said.

I'm probably close to Hawk's experience, when my mom passed, I did not cry at her funeral, nor when she actually passed, I did cry before however when the doctor told me she had little time left, but that's just it, you take the news and events in a different way than other people.

My girlfriend for example, recently went with me to my grandmother's funeral, and she never met her, but was crying because other people were, she's very emotional, some of us not as much, so we take our grieving in a different way.

And no, you are not a bad person because of it.