Loneliness in a crowd

[gentlefeather007]

Has anyone else ever been in a room full of people yet still feel so alone? Lately i find myself feeling this way more and more, it seems that even when i am spoken to it isn't to speak to me but just to speak to someone because everyone else is in conversation groups. It frustrates me to feel this way and i want to fit in with the group but they are just so different than me. The worst part is it isn't certain groups or crowds, even when family is at my home I still feel this way , am i alone in this too or do others feel like this at times? Looking forward to see what others think,is this normal or am i cracking up?

 

[Sodahead]

It's normal for me anyway. Wouldn't wish it on anyone else

 

[shiftdown]

When I came back from deployment, I felt that way, until I started going out and doing somethings I had never done before or rather hadn't done in years...like go to a library...lol, either way expand on your interests and you may be suprised at the outcome, feel free to pm me with any questions

 

[duderino84]

I get this feeling often. I always feel like everyone is calm and mellow, meanwhile in my head I'm sweating, my mind is splitting in half, I'm trying to work on a goal, and the god damn ship is sinking!

 

[Myriads]

This is a very common feeling. Many people feel it often, or at least sometimes in their lives.

The issue centers not on being alone, as you say, you are often around people, but instead it's a manifestation of lack of connectivity. We want to feel as if we are seen and listened to as distinct individuals, and not just because we are a moving prop in someone else's life. It's a manifestation of wanting to be acknowledged as yourself.

That said, developing the ability to form connectivity in interactions is a learnable skill. Mostly it is about practice, and feeling comfortable in situations. If you are engaged in an activity, you become more interesting to others around you. It provides a common point of conversation (Oh, you like depression era glass? What do you think of this art? Oh you rock climb? You were in a band?) and thus makes you appear as a unique individual from the top of an interaction. Which is more then half the battle.

Mostly the path to solution is getting past the hurdle of putting yourself out there, and presenting enough interactive 'hooks' to draw folks into interaction.

It is a crappy feeling to be moving through. Not unlike walking through deep mud. I hope that it passes from your life quickly.

Myriads

 

[Mitchell]

Yes. I had this happen to me just last week.

I had an important training session. After that, the people from the office went to a bar. As I've stated before., I don't drink alcohol, due to my health issues. I told this to my manager, who agreed with my decision, as I guess everyone didn't want me getting sick.

They were all drinking alcohol, and I was drinking my.. Diet Cokes. I was talking to people, but I still felt.. left out.. and a bit alone.

I personally think this feeling can probably happen to many or all people, depending on the situation, whatever your social life might be.

 

[C.A.B.]

This is a very common feeling. Many people feel it often, or at least sometimes in their lives.

The issue centers not on being alone, as you say, you are often around people, but instead it's a manifestation of lack of connectivity. We want to feel as if we are seen and listened to as distinct individuals, and not just because we are a moving prop in someone else's life. It's a manifestation of wanting to be acknowledged as yourself.

That said, developing the ability to form connectivity in interactions is a learnable skill. Mostly it is about practice, and feeling comfortable in situations. If you are engaged in an activity, you become more interesting to others around you. It provides a common point of conversation (Oh, you like depression era glass? What do you think of this art? Oh you rock climb? You were in a band?) and thus makes you appear as a unique individual from the top of an interaction. Which is more then half the battle.

Mostly the path to solution is getting past the hurdle of putting yourself out there, and presenting enough interactive 'hooks' to draw folks into interaction.

It is a crappy feeling to be moving through. Not unlike walking through deep mud. I hope that it passes from your life quickly.

Myriads

^ This.


... or... Its all a giant conspiracy to isolate YOU by THEM so THEY can examine your brain waves with NSA potato chips and KGB onion dip. Next time you are at a party, put the punch bowl on your head to block the Illuminati waves emanating from the conversation circles you are not in.

 

[gentlefeather007]

I wish to thank you all for taking the time to respond to this thread, it makes me feel more at ease with what I am feeling, I am an outgoing guy once I get to know people and this hasn't changed but it just seems different all of a sudden, kinda like Myriads said walking through mud.

I hope this can help others feeling this way too since now I know I am not alone!

Paul

 

[TeeHeeLawrence]

Just takes one...

We've ALL known this feeling.
It requires a bit of patience to get through.
However corny it sounds, each day is a new one, and each gathering at least a little different. Being steadfast and open to contact--as you seem to be--will pay off.

 

[NoNo]

Reminds me of that movie called 'Fresh'. 1994 movie. The scene, where Fresh and Chuckie are outside New York. They are 12-year-old!

[ Fresh: Yeah, I like to come here

Chucky: It's lonesome, you know what's whack
When I'm down with the posse or at home and shit
And everybody be screaming and yelling and shit, it gets real lonesome
It be like crowded and noise and screaming
And suddenly it feels like I'm the only one there

Fresh: The more people there is, the lonelier it get
I have this dream]

 

[Bohemianne]

A book in my bag or an e-book can save the moment.

 

[Dussicar]

Do you have any mental illnesses or disorders that you are aware of?

 

[Dussicar]

^ This.


... or... Its all a giant conspiracy to isolate YOU by THEM so THEY can examine your brain waves with NSA potato chips and KGB onion dip. Next time you are at a party, put the punch bowl on your head to block the Illuminati waves emanating from the conversation circles you are not in.

Or just walk around in little circles at the next party you are at chanting "WHITE MAKES RIGHT!"

lol

 

[maniactickler]

I grew up feeling like that. and still do at times.

 

[Wally West]

Yea I get that feeling all the time. Just comes with being an introvert.

 

[BigJim]

This is a very common feeling. Many people feel it often, or at least sometimes in their lives.

The issue centers not on being alone, as you say, you are often around people, but instead it's a manifestation of lack of connectivity. We want to feel as if we are seen and listened to as distinct individuals, and not just because we are a moving prop in someone else's life. It's a manifestation of wanting to be acknowledged as yourself.

That said, developing the ability to form connectivity in interactions is a learnable skill. Mostly it is about practice, and feeling comfortable in situations. If you are engaged in an activity, you become more interesting to others around you. It provides a common point of conversation (Oh, you like depression era glass? What do you think of this art? Oh you rock climb? You were in a band?) and thus makes you appear as a unique individual from the top of an interaction. Which is more then half the battle.

Mostly the path to solution is getting past the hurdle of putting yourself out there, and presenting enough interactive 'hooks' to draw folks into interaction.

It is a crappy feeling to be moving through. Not unlike walking through deep mud. I hope that it passes from your life quickly.

Myriads

You know, sometimes being the moving prop in another's life or just a part of the crowd would be a step up. Sometimes I look at people who are that dysfunctional and feel jealous.