Everything is upsidedown and I feel like I´m falling down a big black hole. I've been married for about 10 years. My wife is a very nice women, but for about a year it feels like we are drifting apart. None of us wants that, and we don´t really talks about it, but I know that we both feels it and trying to fight it.
I also suddenly know that I have no one to talk to about this. Almost every friend we have is HER friends or relatives. The friends I used to have have moved and we have lost contact over the years, and it hasn't bothered me because I have always liked my wifes friends and it has been enough for me. But now, in this situation, I feel all alone. Please read on if you have the time, it gets more complicated.
Well I thought I might talk to a girl in my office about this. She is a wonderful girl and we understand each other pretty well. She is married and have two kids. I have hesitated, because I dont want to bother her with my problems, and then SUDDENLY she tells me that HER marriage is about to end. She and her husband fight a lot right now and she is leaving him as soon as she finds somewhere to live.
We have discussed this by mail,(to avoid other people to hear about it), and I have offered her my "listening ear" and a "shoulder to cry on". She is as I said a wonderful girl, but I havn't had any special feelings for her before this, but God help me, I think I'm falling in love with her now.
Maybe you all think now that this is a good thing, and that she might like me too in that way, but I'm sure that it isn't so. Although she is talking to me about her problems, but I can see that she prefers talking to a few of the other girls at the office.
I also - before I met my wife - have a history of female friends that I wanted to be my girlfriends, but they never wanted me in any other way than just being a friend, (though their mothers always wanted me as their son in law).
I rekognize the pattern here also. There is such a little chance that she would care for me in that way. Even if there would be a chance, there isn't a good time right now when her life is in a mess, cause I don't think that she is ready to replace her husband over night, even if they have a bad marriage.
And even if she would care for me, how could I live with myself if I left my wife who is absolutely faithfull to me. I could never cheat on my wife. I would have to leave her before I met another women, but I'm so very afraid to be all alone, and not beeing able to meet anyone. I'm not an ugly person, but as I said, I'm not that kind of guy that women usually wants as a man, only as i friend. I'm not so very young anymore either.
To stay with my wife and trying to make the best of it, is not a bad alternative. There must be a lot of people out there having a lot worse. Still I can't ignore that I'm falling in love with another women even if I know that there isn't likely to lead anywhere.
Has anyone of you guys been through anything like this? I really need all advice I can get. Something that can help me think straight here.
Tick33
I also suddenly know that I have no one to talk to about this. Almost every friend we have is HER friends or relatives. The friends I used to have have moved and we have lost contact over the years, and it hasn't bothered me because I have always liked my wifes friends and it has been enough for me. But now, in this situation, I feel all alone. Please read on if you have the time, it gets more complicated.
Well I thought I might talk to a girl in my office about this. She is a wonderful girl and we understand each other pretty well. She is married and have two kids. I have hesitated, because I dont want to bother her with my problems, and then SUDDENLY she tells me that HER marriage is about to end. She and her husband fight a lot right now and she is leaving him as soon as she finds somewhere to live.
We have discussed this by mail,(to avoid other people to hear about it), and I have offered her my "listening ear" and a "shoulder to cry on". She is as I said a wonderful girl, but I havn't had any special feelings for her before this, but God help me, I think I'm falling in love with her now.
Maybe you all think now that this is a good thing, and that she might like me too in that way, but I'm sure that it isn't so. Although she is talking to me about her problems, but I can see that she prefers talking to a few of the other girls at the office.
I also - before I met my wife - have a history of female friends that I wanted to be my girlfriends, but they never wanted me in any other way than just being a friend, (though their mothers always wanted me as their son in law).
I rekognize the pattern here also. There is such a little chance that she would care for me in that way. Even if there would be a chance, there isn't a good time right now when her life is in a mess, cause I don't think that she is ready to replace her husband over night, even if they have a bad marriage.
And even if she would care for me, how could I live with myself if I left my wife who is absolutely faithfull to me. I could never cheat on my wife. I would have to leave her before I met another women, but I'm so very afraid to be all alone, and not beeing able to meet anyone. I'm not an ugly person, but as I said, I'm not that kind of guy that women usually wants as a man, only as i friend. I'm not so very young anymore either.
To stay with my wife and trying to make the best of it, is not a bad alternative. There must be a lot of people out there having a lot worse. Still I can't ignore that I'm falling in love with another women even if I know that there isn't likely to lead anywhere.
Has anyone of you guys been through anything like this? I really need all advice I can get. Something that can help me think straight here.
Tick33
