The Bacon Tree Joke
Back in the cowboy days, a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food. No other humans had been seen for days. And then they saw an old Jewish man sitting beneath a tree. The leader rushed to him and said, "We're lost and running out of food. Is there someplace ahead where we can get food?
"Vell," the old man said, "I vouldn't go up dat hill, und down other side. Somevun told me you'd run into a big bacon tree."
"A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader.
"Yah, ah bacon tree â?¦ Trust me. For nuttin vud I lie."
The leader goes, back and tells his people that if nothing else, they might be able to find food on the other side of the next ridge. "So why did he say not to go there?" some pioneers asked.
"Oh, you know those Jewish people-they don't eat bacon." So the wagon
train goes up the hill and down the other side.
Suddenly, Indians are attacking and they massacre everyone except the leader, who manages to escape back to the old Jewish man, who's enjoying a "glassel tea."
The near-dead man starts shouting. "You fool! You sent us to our deaths!
We followed your instructions, but there was no bacon tree. Just hundreds of indians, who killed everyone."
The old Jewish man holds up his hand and says "Oy, â?¦vait a minute." He then gets out an English-Yiddish dictionary, and begins thumbing through it.
"Oy Gevalt, I made myself such ah big mistake. It vuzn't a bacon tree.
(Prepare yourself and scroll down.)
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It vuz a ham bush!" ouch ouch ouch......
Back in the cowboy days, a westbound wagon train was lost and low on food. No other humans had been seen for days. And then they saw an old Jewish man sitting beneath a tree. The leader rushed to him and said, "We're lost and running out of food. Is there someplace ahead where we can get food?
"Vell," the old man said, "I vouldn't go up dat hill, und down other side. Somevun told me you'd run into a big bacon tree."
"A bacon tree?" asked the wagon train leader.
"Yah, ah bacon tree â?¦ Trust me. For nuttin vud I lie."
The leader goes, back and tells his people that if nothing else, they might be able to find food on the other side of the next ridge. "So why did he say not to go there?" some pioneers asked.
"Oh, you know those Jewish people-they don't eat bacon." So the wagon
train goes up the hill and down the other side.
Suddenly, Indians are attacking and they massacre everyone except the leader, who manages to escape back to the old Jewish man, who's enjoying a "glassel tea."
The near-dead man starts shouting. "You fool! You sent us to our deaths!
We followed your instructions, but there was no bacon tree. Just hundreds of indians, who killed everyone."
The old Jewish man holds up his hand and says "Oy, â?¦vait a minute." He then gets out an English-Yiddish dictionary, and begins thumbing through it.
"Oy Gevalt, I made myself such ah big mistake. It vuzn't a bacon tree.
(Prepare yourself and scroll down.)
---
---
---
It vuz a ham bush!" ouch ouch ouch......
What can I say, I'm a meshugenner! 
