Problems with desires in the bedroom..

[nymphlee211]

Hey guys. So recently I've involved myself in a fun little relationship with a friend of mine, who's a little older. The sex and the foreplay has been great and all, but...he doesn't seem to be willing to try any new things. I told him in the beginning about the tickling and how it turned me on and he seemed up for it, but he has yet to do what I REALLY want. Is it just there are some people out there who don't want to bother trying new things? I'm into all the toys and bondage, and want to experiment, and we've had...well..plain sex. It's not exciting hahaha, can anyone help?

 

[the_jimmy_james]

A lot of folks think that the only reason for bedroom fun is to make a girl happy... then you can "have sex." They may be good at foreplay, but they never consider that devious things can be combined with the more intimate experience! Talk it over with him and state clearly something that you want him to try... see how he responds. If it's positively, then go for it! Try it. If it's neutrally, tell him that it's very important to you.

If it's negative, well... tell him how important it is... you know, a break-up level important.

 

[nymphlee211]

Well, we're just fooling around, we're not dating. And he's brought something up about a threesome, which I said if he/I found a girl I'd try, and then I said to him, "what other kinky things can we do? i want to know what else turns you on.." and his response was something like, "hun, i like the sex and the foreplay. i'm not into the tying up and toys as much as you...i like what we've been doing..."

basically, i think i'm screwed lol

 

[the_jimmy_james]

Well... I think if you want to bring it up and just tell him how important it is to you, that there's no harm there. Worst thing is that he just says no, but if he knows that these things are really something you love and want to share? He may relent in his pig-headed man-thoughts! 😀

 

[Violetta]

If he is only a fuck buddy, then those are a dime a dozen. Since what you have got going is totally physical, then I say if he is not giving you what you desire, find a new man to play with. There are far more interesting ones out there, trust me.

 

[kopfhorer1]

I second what Bella Donna has just said. If he's too selfish to at least listen to all of your needs, you owe it to yourself to find someone more considerate. This guy sounds to me like he has some growing up to do, like someone who doesn't care about much else other than getting what he wants.

I'll admit that like anyone else, there are some things which I won't do or that I'm reluctant to consider. But I'll slap my cards on the table at least most of the time (yeah, I've succumbed to fear of rejection on occasion), and if nothing else I'll stop and think about stuff which I haven't yet tried. In any case, I'll do whatever I can to satisfy my partner because I myself know how bad frustration feels.

 

[melanie2]

he wants a threesome yet won't try bondage?? hmm...since he isn't your boyfriend, i'd do what Bella et al suggested..

 

[hsfn]

if he doesn't listen now, there is will definitely be even less listening in the future. Sounds like a one way street.

 

[Frost King]

Yeah, i agree with bella since you not dating him then just find someone else that will be interested in tickling. i had told my one female friend that i like tickling and i asked her if she wanted to try it she said ok i will for you. and she loved it. so but the point is there's gotta be plenty of other people out there that might want to try tickling you just have to look for them.

 

[lovetickles22]

it sucks

i have the same problem with my guy.