The Maid...

[Zebra]

Ok...here's my dilemna...We hire a maid, and they're here for usually about 2 hours.

I was approached earlier at work today by a lady who said her friend was wanting to get more business cleaning houses. This girl that cleans is Mexican. Speaks VERY little English. VERY little.

Here's what I'm thinking...I have the carpets cleaned on the same day I hire her to come clean. Of course, we can't wear shoes when the carpets are cleaned, so it's socks or bare feet. I'm going to get another friend to tell me how to say "I lost an earring under the bed, will you help me look while I lift the bed?" in Spanish. Then, when she is climbing under, I lower the bed back down, and lay across those bare feet. She doesn't really speak English, but I want to hear that lovely Mexican laughter come out from under the bed...

She's telling me she'll clean the house for about $50.00. I'm figuring $100.00 and an explanation in Spanish that I was "just having a little fun" would be ok...

I'm thinking a good 15 minute tickling would be great!

Whaddya think?

 

[guitman69]

Dude, don't even do it. Very wrong! And on so many levels.

 

[Myriads]

Illegal inprisonment

Assault.

A fun fantasy idea. A very bad reality. Avoid the charges. Don't do it.

Myriads

 

[Novus]

Tickling your maid

Doing what you discribed would get you in so much trouble. A very short 10 second tickle might be OK but anything more then that and it would be clear that you were more then just fooling around. You could get away with more if this Mexican girl was your friend and not your maid.

 

[BellaRisa]

Not a good idea. Rude to touch someone without their permission.

Bella

 

[P50]

Zebra asks, "...<I>Whaddya think?</I>..."

I think you're going to meet her mother, and her brothers, and her father, and that you're going to learn about Latin American family life. Think about the concepts of love and protection, and how they go together. You'll learn first hand what it's like.

Then, after your introduction to her family, you can have a religious awakening ! Yes, change your life forever !

Do you like to go to church ? Hope so, since you'll probably join their church, as marriage will definitely be in your near future.

Now, about this legal record for misconduct; Don't worry. I don't <B><I>think</I></B> that qualifies you for the registered sex offenders registry (does anybody know for sure ?)

 

[Phineas]

Zebra asks, "...<I>Whaddya think?</I>..."

You'll learn first hand what it's like.

...most likely at the hands of a tire iron.

Then, after your introduction to her family, you can have a religious awakening ! Yes, change your life forever !

Do you like to go to church ? Hope so, since you'll probably join their church, as marriage will definitely be in your near future.

😀

...assuming he awakens at all, I think a hospital stay is more likely than marriage.

I too am curious as to what the fact that she doesn't speak English has to do with this, especially given the fact that we recently had a thread where a great number of people professed that they'd prefer if their victim was unable to communicate to them a desire to stop. Ignoring the obvious "issues" with such ideas, and assuming our original poster is not merely trying to exert his dominance over an "inferior", I'd like to hear his justification for picking out someone of this nature.

And just to further be a wet blanket, if the girl's not ticklish (simply impossible, I know, every attractive girl in this perfect world is as ticklish as the day is long) he's going to look pretty silly having set up this elaborate ruse.

(The thoughts people entertain on this board never fail to amaze me...)

 

[Zebra]

Thanks for most of your replies.

AMK...I appreciate your straightforward answer, and additional response.

As for most of the others, the "you should be put into a hospital, or have to marry her, or learn her culture" folks...This is EXACTLY why people lurk. I've been around since Nov 2001, and have 17 posts. Why? Because most of the "how about this" posts get SUCH negative responses!

P50? I don't think that tickling someone requires me to get to know their culture, or their family.

Phineas? Having a non-english speaking 'lee is probably a fantasy of lots of folks...I just happen to have the possibilty of it becoming a reality.

 

[Phineas]

Thanks for most of your replies.

As for most of the others, the "you should be put into a hospital, or have to marry her, or learn her culture" folks...This is EXACTLY why people lurk. I've been around since Nov 2001, and have 17 posts.

Perhaps those people need to learn to read better. I didn't say you "should" be put into a hospital. Only that assaulting someone has consequences. I'm not sure where P50 was going with the marraige thing but I know plenty of hispanic guys that *would* take a tire iron to someone who molested their sister/girlfriend/whoever in such a fashion. It's not worth the risk. I wasn't wishing such a fate on you, my friend. But grabbing strangers has more risks than payoff.

Phineas? Having a non-english speaking 'lee is probably a fantasy of lots of folks...I just happen to have the possibilty of it becoming a reality.

...against her will. even better.

a lot of my wife's friends don't speak English very well, but I don't plot to do things like this to them, as much as I'd like to tickle them.

. Why? Because most of the "how about this" posts get SUCH negative responses!

BECAUSE THEY'RE VERY BAD IDEAS.

"Hey guys, I'm thinking of kidnapping someone - I mean, a lot of people have these fantasies, I can get away with it, so why not?
Treating people like an object is no big deal, right?"

Right?

Guys?

 

[Iggy pop]

Previous Posts have said you risk imprisonment, and or a beating from a pissed relative. These are real possiblities, but most likely you could get away with it. This does not mean you should do it. There are to many unknowns. You don't know how this person will react. What if she is claustrophobic and has a panic attack? What if she totally freaks out over the tickling? What if she is not ticklish? What if she tells a realative and that relative inform the authorties? What if that realative comes over to kick your ass? There are just too many unknowns. I think you may be able to get away with a quick 3 second tickle while she is searching under the bed, but trapping her is definitely a no no.

 

[confessor]

I think you should go for it, Zebra. I think a lot of people on this forum are over-sensitive to the everyday tickles that happen in the real world. That's one of the reasons I don't post much either. Reading this forum, you get the impression that most tickles begin with a question, "Can I tickle you?" That's nonsense. Tickling just happens. We may see it as sexual, but regular folk see it as a harmless, almost meaningless human encounter (unless it goes too far). I find it ridiculous to think this girl's family would demand a beating or marriage. I find it ridiculous to think that her family would see this as "molestation". Such reactions would be far stranger than tickling a girl's feet out of the blue.

In my opinion,grabbing her butt would be far worse than tickling her feet. To me, they are not even in the same category. I am not trying to step on anyone's toes. But I think, if people followed most of the advice given on this forum, there would be far less tickling in the world. Zebra, I think what you are planning to do is an example of those everyday tickles that nobody really talks about or even cares about. Just because it means something to you, doesn't mean it will register to her as anything but a silly gesture. I see no problem with your plan.

 

[P50]

I'll try

Hope I can get this across with the intended friendship.

From Zebra

<I>...This is EXACTLY why people lurk....Because most of the "how about this" posts get SUCH negative responses! ..." </I>

My Good Man Zebra, you asked, "Whaddya think?" after writing details of a plan that could net you a criminal record. We, your community members, responded in alarm and warning.

Uh, Zebra, we're trying to separate <B>bad</B> ideas from a <B>good</B> man ! We don't want to see you in cuffs in front of a judge; and we write this forcefully to warn you against the very behavior that is likely to produce this (or quite possibly produce "urban justice", with family members taking the law into their own hands) and then you get upset with us for thinking further than you have, on your own behalf ?

Let me take a short break here; <B>DUH !</B>

Okay, now back to another matter.

Zebra: <I>P50? I don't think that tickling someone requires me to get to know their culture, or their family. </I>

Phinneas: <I>I'm not sure where P50 was going with the marraige thing</I>

Will somebody explain to these young'uns what a shotgun wedding is ?

Really, I'm not sure if tickling is going far enough for it, but with certain Latin American cultures, you don't <B>want</B> a cooperative girl, because tomorrow she's your wife. No proposal, diamond ring, or any of that is required. You have a new wife and her family is now your in-laws. (i.e., your in-laws are now the ones who showed up with their tire tools.)

Look Zebra, <I>"...Whaddya think?..."</I> I think you're thinking dangerously, and I hope you will think of some other avenue. I also think that the media could get ahold of you, and the next thing you know, the whole community is painted as persons who can't be trusted with responsibility.

I have personally known one such family member to do major physical damage to a person's car based on verbal reports from a sister. Not common, but I saw the results in the parking lot.

Zebra, Zebra, Zebra; before you harm yourself; stop. People care about our community, including individual members such as you.

 

[BellaRisa]

Rant about touching strangers

Fellas, I have got to ask: who told you it was okay to touch other people without permission as adults??

I'm serious about this. I keep reading this kind of thing here and it drives me nuts. I have to qualify confessor's statement about how tickling "just happens". He's right, but in my experience it doesn't 'just happen' between strangers, or people who barely know each other. I've had guys at parties or clubs get a quick tickle in while rubbing my feet or giving me a backrub, but once they've gotten my permission to do those things we've obviously become reasonably familiar and friendly. But a new employer or strange guy on the train? EW. At what age do males get past adolescence, and stop trying to see what they can get away with regarding females?

I've been a female for years now (g), and let me tell you-we reaaaaalllly *don't* like being touched by people who don't have the right to touch us. I am one of the most sensual girls on the Earth, and there are folks here who can attest to that 🙄. BUT, you need to be a good friend and/or lover, or relative-NOT Joe Random Schmoe looking to include me in his quick thrill. A quick tickle can earn a quick fat lip. And I'm not just talking about tickling here, guys. Don't yank our braids because you think they're cute or sexy or whatever. If we're expecting, don't just rub and poke at our bellies without asking...ugh. And DON'T put your big grody nose on my head just because you're taller than me and my shampoo smells good .

Know what? You probably have a good chance of playing with my feet if you ask me first, or if that's too pedestrian, just get to know me and make me comfortable enough with you to share myself. But if you creep me out by showing a lack of manners and inability to control yourself, you become null and void pretty damn quick.

Are the other mothers out there not teaching little boys to keep their hands to themselves? My mommy taught me this, I refuse to believe she was the only one...

Alright, end of spiel, and apologies to the gentlemen out there to whom this doesn't pertain, you know who you are 😉

Bella

 

[Phineas]

Confessor...

...did you even read what Zebra was planning to do? You really have no problem with his planning to bring a woman to his apartment under false pretenses, pin her under a piece of furniture, subject her to fifteen minutes (his quote, not mine) of nonconsensual tickling, then offer her some money to keep her quiet?

If we're overreacting, good call.😡

 

[confessor]

Ok Phineas,

Let's disect this for a second. First, let me say that 15 minutes would probably give him away as being a strange dude. I would recommend a much shorter period of tickling (like less than a minute). Second, I believe the offer of money would only be given if she appeared distraught about the tickling. I don't think he would hand it to her saying, "please don't say anything about me tickling your feet". Third, this whole issue with "false pretenses" was the point of my first post. For us, almost every tickle (unless it is with a girlfriend) is going to be a "false pretense" tickle. When an average person is tickled, they don't automatically think, "Oh my God, he must have a tickle fetish". The fact that we are turned on by tickling makes almost every tickle under "false pretenses", because the ticklee has no idea what it means to us.

I agree that Zebra should have some relationship of trust with this girl, but I thought that had been established through the other people she did housecleaning for. I also agree that 15 minutes would be a bit much without explicit consent. However, to me, a little tickling of her feet, while under the bed, would be seen as fairly innocent behavior. I don't think Zebra's intent (the fact that he likes tickling feet) should enter into it. If we allowed intent to control our tickling behavior, we would probably never tickle anybody, except in dating relationships.

I have no intent to date many of the girls I tickle. Some of my friends who know me see it as "flirting", because they know I like tickling feet. But to me, it is not flirting, it is just satisfying that desire to tickle girls. I guess that sounds kind of psychotic (in a serial killer kind of way), but it is the truth. I don't feel bad about this, because, the way I see it, if it wasn't me tickling them, it would be someone else, who would derive far less pleasure from it than I would.

I can respect Bella's position on this. And on the whole, I agree with her. Men should not touch women, unless there is some level of relationship between them. I just think that relationship can be established very quickly. How can you explain a guy grinding on a girl on the dance floor of a night club when they don't even know each other? It happens. Is it really that different from tickling?

Oh well. I guess I should shut up and listen to your responses. I just think the regular world sees sexual advances (Example: grabbing ass) much different from tickling feet. Personally, I have no problem taking advantage of this. I think it is one of the things that levels the playing field. I know I will never meet a girl who really wants me to take her to my bedroom and tickle her. That just isn't going to happen. Most girls are like most men - they want to have straight sex. So why shouldn't I take advantage of the normal tickle opportunities that present themsevles?

In conclusion, I agree that one must be careful. However, if you can make the tickling look like a normal event, I say go for it. Life is too short to be paralyzed by concerns that someone might think you are a "weird larry". Intent has nothing to do with it. When it comes to tickling, appearance is everything.

BTW, wasn't there a true story recently about an adult man who trapped his kids' teenage babysitter under the bed and tickled her feet for a good length of time? Let me tell you, if an adult male can get away with this on a minor girl, surely Zebra can accomplish his mission without a hitch.

 

[confessor]

Check out the post called "Don't Go Under The Bed" in the stories section (I think it is on the third page back from current).

 

[Phineas]

confessor,

this is the last time I'm going to post to this thread, as I see that there are just some fundamental things we disagree on. that's okay. 🙂 but you're misinterpreting a few things here, which I'd like to clarify.

Ok Phineas,

Let's disect this for a second. First, let me say that 15 minutes would probably give him away as being a strange dude. I would recommend a much shorter period of tickling (like less than a minute).

...so the long and short of it is, you agree that his plan is overkill and would make him look bad in the eyes of the maid, and the friend who referred her, I'd imagine. So in essence you're agreeing with the rest of us. You don't object to him trying to tickle her, but trapping her under the bed for fifteen minutes is Bad. If I recall, the rest of us said that too.

Second, I believe the offer of money would only be given if she appeared distraught about the tickling. I don't think he would hand it to her saying, "please don't say anything about me tickling your feet".

No, but he planned on offering her double her housecleaning fee, which to me says that he knew he was putting her through an inconvenience. Otherwise, why the extra compensation?

Third, this whole issue with "false pretenses" was the point of my first post. For us, almost every tickle (unless it is with a girlfriend) is going to be a "false pretense" tickle

Inviting a girl over to clean your house (when you don't really want her to) then asking her to look under your bed for a non-existent earring is false pretenses, no matter how you want to look at it.

When an average person is tickled, they don't automatically think, "Oh my God, he must have a tickle fetish". The fact that we are turned on by tickling makes almost every tickle under "false pretenses", because the ticklee has no idea what it means to us.

not everyone who likes tickling gets turned on by it. however, you're misinterpreting the idea of false pretenses here. hiding your fetish and tickling someone "as fun" is not the issue at hand here. Lying to someone in order to get them into your apartment so you can pin them under a piece of furniture most certainly is. Again, he invited her over to clean his house, but wanted to tickle her. THAT's false pretense.

I agree that Zebra should have some relationship of trust with this girl, but I thought that had been established through the other people she did housecleaning for.

From what I gather, he's never even met her. His friend is obviously doing the woman a favor by asking people *she* knows if they need a maid. There's no former "bond" of any sort through the friend doing the recruiting.

I also agree that 15 minutes would be a bit much without explicit consent.

then why are you telling everyone who objected to the fifteen minute plan (sounds like a cell phone ad, don't it? lol) that they're overreacting?

However, to me, a little tickling of her feet, while under the bed, would be seen as fairly innocent behavior. I don't think Zebra's intent (the fact that he likes tickling feet) should enter into it. If we allowed intent to control our tickling behavior, we would probably never tickle anybody, except in dating relationships.

so lying to someone in order to trap them is okay?

How can you explain a guy grinding on a girl on the dance floor of a night club when they don't even know each other? It happens. Is it really that different from tickling?

...the guy asked her to dance, indicating his intent. (Grinding is part of many of today's dances, God knows why, but we won't go there.) If the guy asked her to sell her insurance and then started grinding, then we have a problem.

Oh well. I guess I should shut up and listen to your responses. I just think the regular world sees sexual advances (Example: grabbing ass) much different from tickling feet.

We are not treating this as a sexual/non-sexual issue. We are treating it as what it is; a guy lying to a woman he doesn't even know in order to trap her in his apartment and do something to her that she probably doesn't want done.

So why shouldn't I take advantage of the normal tickle opportunities that present themsevles?

pinning someone under your bed is not a "normal tickle opportunity".

Intent has nothing to do with it. When it comes to tickling, appearance is everything.

even the appearance of this scenario is foul.

BTW, wasn't there a true story recently about an adult man who trapped his kids' teenage babysitter under the bed and tickled her feet for a good length of time? Let me tell you, if an adult male can get away with this on a minor girl, surely Zebra can accomplish his mission without a hitch.

I read the story. It was fine until he started regaling how he used this method to trap numerous people. The whole bit about young girls disturbed me a little.

...and in conclusion, just because you can get away with something doesn't make it okay.

 

[P50]

Most Frightening Thread So Far

<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I>I don't think Zebra's intent (the fact that he likes tickling feet) should enter into it. </I>

Do you think his intent to plot, and scheme with deliberate lies, should enter into it ? Have you ever heard the phrase, "malice aforethought" ?




<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I>If we allowed intent to control our tickling behavior, we would probably never tickle anybody, except in dating relationships. </I>

Uh sir, that happens to be the very rule I follow.




<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I> I have no intent to date many of the girls I tickle. ... it is just satisfying that desire to tickle girls. </I>

NO FAIR ! Now all the single girls on the TMF will be flooding your inbox with E-mails begging you to let them be yours. Probably most of the wives will leave their husbands as well. Guys like me will get nowhere fast.




<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I>I guess that sounds kind of psychotic (in a serial killer kind of way), but it is the truth. I don't feel bad about this, because, the way I see it, if it wasn't me tickling them, it would be someone else, who would derive far less pleasure from it than I would. </I>

That's an interesting perspective (which I don't have).




<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I>Men should not touch women, unless there is some level of relationship between them. I just think that relationship can be established very quickly. </I>

Now <B>that</B> is convenience at its best. Just curious, how quickly can you form a relationship that allows another person to borrow money from you ? How quickly can you decide on employment relationships ? For that matter, do you believe in any time requirements for any relationships ?




<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I>How can you explain a guy grinding on a girl on the dance floor of a night club when they don't even know each other? It happens. Is it really that different from tickling? </I>

First question/explanation: that guy is not me. You won't see me doing that in public with a woman I just met. In fact, you probably won't find me in that club in the first place; but that's another discusssion. How does one explain that guy (and girl) ? Neither of them are in my social strata; that's how. Are they in the social strata of the majority of other TMF members ? Don't ask me !

Second question: Yes; the girl's in public and has about a 100 percent chance of calling it off at once on the spot and walking out on the guy right then and there. i.e., "watch it buster, or you're outta here." That isn't the case Zebra is contemplating. (In fact it's the exact opposite.)




<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I>I know I will never meet a girl who really wants me to take her to my bedroom and tickle her. That just isn't going to happen. </I>

I happen to have let three such women slip away from me in the past; long before the word "internet" was a common vocabulary word amongst computer jocks (much less the guys who cut our hair, our grandmothers, and the gorgeous humans who read the teleprompter while staring into a TV camera each night.).

I never really thought of this, but you could be right; every single woman on the TMF could be a full-fledged liar, and these married couples too.

Allright all you women and married couples ! Come clean ! We're finally on to your conspiratorial plot ! Caught at last ! Bwa ha ha. etc.




<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I>Intent has nothing to do with it. </I>

Thanks for the public tip-off. That's where you and I will be in a totally different camp.

Intent has anywhere from 75% to 100% "to do with it" in a <I>lot </I>of things; ask your local traffic cop; ask any school principal; ask any judge or lawyer; ask any clergyman; ask any grandmother; ask any business owner; ask me.

This matter of intent gets right to the fulcrum.

I am starting to understand exactly where you are on that balancing beam. A lot of others are also.




<B>Confessor writes:</B> <I>BTW, wasn't there a true story recently about an adult man ... teenage ... surely Zebra can accomplish his mission without a hitch.</I>

Gulp !

Is that a public cry for help ?

Is it really a Ph.D. at a university demonstrating something from the psychology textbooks ?

Confessor, I <B><I>REALLY</I></B> can't handle any more of this discussion.

You sir, are frightening.

 

[obticklr]

you must separate fantasy from reality

I will be 45yrs old next month,and have had a serious foot tickling fetish since the age of 5. I have been married for 13 yrs to a girl who's feet are absolutely off the scale ticklish. I know this, because I've tried tickling them. She is not in the least interested in being tickled. It is absolute Torture for her.It is a common fantasy to many of our community to tickle a very ticklish woman. As deeply ingrained as tickling is in me,I DON'T TICKLE HER. Why, because she hates it. Just because she's my wife, doesn't mean I have the right to do things to her that bring major discomfort. No matter how much I want to. Zebra, what makes you think you have the right to take such liberties with a virtual stranger? If someone did what you are planning with my wife I'd use the crow bar to turn you into a popsicle. So would this maid's family. I think that technicaly what you described is called Kidnapping in certain states. You MUST separate fantasy from reality. Fantasy hurts no one and almost always satisfys your taste for tickling. I derive great pleasure from this outstanding forum,as well as it's caring community. Before I discovered this forum, I thought I was a freak, and had most of my life. We're all on your side here. We just don't want to see you do something that could potentially get you in big trouble.

 

[Static]

my opinion

I think you have a better chance getting a prostitute and tickling her under false pretenses than doing this. And she wont tell the cops cause....shes a prostitute. just thought Id lighten the mood a little. on the serious tip. just dont try it.

 

[ForgottenTcklr]

I think it's not a big deal to give her toes a quick tickle, but to pin her down with a bed and tickle torture her, you are looking at a SERIOUS Issue!!!

 

[dvnc]

Add me to the list of folks that think actually lowering a bed on top of your maid and then tickling her (criminal assault) while illegally imprisoning her (which also qualifies as kidnapping) is a VERY bad idea. If it's proven to sexually arouse you, it CAN lead to rape charges, too. Pray that the authorities in your locale never find this forum. I know authorities that could. Heck, there's several FEDS in THIS FORUM. Some attend events with us.

Since it's not been mentioned, do let me also say that Spanish is spoken in many parts of the US. I learned it as a kid, in California, 'cause there were so many sources. It's like French with the Canadians.

The point, though, that isn't being stressed NEARLY enough is that you're talking about victimizing someone. Doing something to someone without their consent. Non-consentual activities most often fall into both illegal and unethical categories.

It's not surprising that such notions get negative responses. I know I don't want you getting arrested for such. I don't want that young lady suffering such. I don't want other encouraged to do something that would not only harm them and their victims, but that would ALSO harm this community, repeatedly. Heck, someone could successfully argue that shutting the TMF down would have prevented your doing such. Wanna get us shut down?

THAT'S why suggestions that are illegal and immoral are so vehemently argued against. We ain't against you as much as we're against what you're proposin' as a concept. Havin' one of us arrested and jailed 'cause someone like confessor told 'em it was a great idea is just not cool.

 

[starfires]

Seeing lots of negative responses here to the idea of {inviting someone under false pretenses, restraining and tickling them against their will, then appeasing them with money} -- I am very happy. One question, though: who here has endorsed just such practices by purchasing the "Without Concent" video?

 

[sole seeker]

I gotta agree with the majority. Don't do it.

I don't know what the law is where you live, but I'll bet it's similar to the state statutes where I live. If you hold someone against their will (even for a few minutes) that is kidnapping. If you touch someone in an offensive way (tickling qualifies) that is assault.

If you do this and your maid talks about it to someone who talks her into complaining to the cops, your ass is going to jail. No maybe about it.

If that doesn't persuade you, consider this... Like Bella said, what you're planning is just plain wrong. If you're lucky and get away with it, that still doesn't make it right.

 

[asutickler]

Oh, for crying out loud...

Um, yeah. This is one of those things that goes beyond "wrong," and lands firmly in the bin marked "DAMN wrong."


You'd stand a damn good chance of landing in the slammer, but let's ignore that for a moment...


What the HELL ever happened to the "Golden Rule?!?" I don't mean the TMF Golden Rule, I mean the universal golden rule... You know: "Do onto others as you would have done unto you."


How would YOU like it if someone you barely knew and had absolutely no feelings/desire for WHATSOEVER did something like this to you? Hmmmm? Say you got tossed in the pokey for pulling the aforementioned stunt with the maid, and your big, nasty, smelly, hairy cellmate named Brutus tricked YOU into crawling under the bunk in your cell... and then pinned YOU down and tickled YOUR feet for 15 minutes, and then tried to buy your silence with a carton of cigarettes. How would that make YOU feel? Violated? I'd say. Dirty? Damn right. Pissed off? I'd bet money on it.


Now what in the living HELL makes you want to do that to another person, huh?


Jesus. It's revolting that people actually need to be TOLD these sorts of things...



ASUTickler