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the REAL sandwich story

Avenger314

Verified
Joined
Mar 6, 2002
Messages
893
Points
16
Ok, ok, ok. There has been a lot of talk about 'the sandwich.' I think it's time to set aside the misconceptions and reveal the true story of the sandiwch.

We (Me, Azrael, Chaneda, ASUtickler, and Alyson) got back from the event around 9 PM. We decided that since we were in Philadelphia, we were going to order Philly Cheese Steaks. Our first mistake was leaving executive decision-making capabilities in the hands of Azrael, who was at that time, exceedingly drunk.

We ordered five large Philly Cheese Steaks. The guy on the phone said "You do know that these sandwiches are two feet long, right? Az said "Get 'em anyway!" He also insisted on ordering 'Mega' french fries (four types of cheeses and bacon). We managed to talk him down to one order of said fries.
Anway, the delivery man arrived. I tackled Az to keep him from the door and ushered the delivery man away just before Az recovered enough to..... do I know not what.

Anyway, there I am with a warm, delightful bag of five sandwiches. I love Philly Cheese steak sandwiches, and here I am with ten aggregate feet of them. So at this point, it was only natural that I express my affection for the sandwiches residing in my lap. I believe the exact quote was, "I don't want that sandwich. Avenger just molested it." This was not at all true. It was an exaggeration. A slight one. Oh, who am I kidding? It's true.

Anyway, the other funny part was when we all finally got our sandwiches and my reaction was, "This really isn't that good. It's just steak, cheese, and bread." We all cracked up.

Azrael at this point, who sobers up about as quickly as turtles swim the English channel, decided that the sandwich needed to be treated as a NEST member. Specifically, a ticklee. So, he decided the next step was to handcuff the sandwich to Chaneda's bed. (This was, of course, after his head wound up intimiately acquainted with the sandwich). To answer a question that Jonmnath wound up asking, the sandwich did not safeword.

As time passed, I eventually went for a walk. I knocked on the room door and took three steps back on general principles. Which was wise, as the door opening was accompanied by a swing of the sandwich right where my head had been.
Azrael did a very slow chase and we wound up in the hospitality suite, relaxing with Jonmath, KittenToes, AffectionateDan, and Ayla NY. We eventually went to bed, but this was NOT the end of the sandwich saga.

The next morning, I find out that 3 of the people were horribly sick from sandwich-induced nausea. (ASUtickler, in particular, will likely NOT be wolfing down 2 feet of a sandwich in 10 minutes again). According to Azrael, the sandwich was still on the Pepsi machine. He went up, got it, and brought it to the breakfast table. I always thought 'going green' was an expression, but that's exactly what ASUtickler did.

As I write this, the sandwich is now next to the monitor. I am going to sign off now. The sandwich will remain. I just fear that it will multiply and there will be 30 feet of sandwich waiting to slay me.

Good luck, everyone.
And my new safeword is 'Philly Cheese.'

That is the true story of the sandwich. Accept no substitutes
 
The part Avenger has conveniently left out of the story was when he was out of the room, I called him and informed him of our google search where Jim and Avenger turned up numerous results pertaining to Sandwich porn and sexual food pictures.

Also, inquiring minds forced me to ask had the Sandwich used its safeword yet seeing as how Az and Avenger left with it never to return. (Sexy music noise)Bum Chica Bum Bum
 
Sounds like ya'll had WAY too much fun... is there any "picture evidence" of said sandwich? :shock: I hope the sandwich wasn't scarred by the said molestation... I would have loved to have been there to witness THAT.... lol
 
At least we didn't go through with the idea of lighting it on fire, passing it around, and taking hits.

FYI, for anyone who comes to NEST next year, you may get the chance to meet the sandwich, as it is packed as we speak and will be carefully preserved (read: sealed in a ziplock bag and frozen).
 
too funny

Having sat across from ASU after he finished the sandwich, I am not surprised that he "went green." That was somewhat predictable. Although I missed it, the image of Az swinging and missing and then giving slow speed pursuit is causing me to laugh about every 3 minutes or so. Thanks for letting me into the stange world of Room 225 a few times. It was a real trip.

Q
 
James_Bond4334 said:
The part Avenger has conveniently left out of the story was when he was out of the room, I called him and informed him of our google search where Jim and Avenger turned up numerous results pertaining to Sandwich porn and sexual food pictures.

Also, inquiring minds forced me to ask had the Sandwich used its safeword yet seeing as how Az and Avenger left with it never to return. (Sexy music noise)Bum Chica Bum Bum


Geez,i'm sooo sorry i missed out on that.:jester: :jester:
 
Re: Sandwich story: heeheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheehheeheheheheheehehe

Something about the difference between men and boys and their toys!!!!!
 
The real story...

You forgot when Amnesiac came in and asked us about the fries and you. *nods* They also got some "special loving"...but nowhere near as much as that poor sandwhich.

I can't even look at one the same way again T_T
 
Man, just when I thought it was safe to leave you guys go and order a regional staple from an obviously non-reputable establishment, and rather than eating it all this melee ensues; WTF why do I always miss fun stuff like this??
 
i've heard some good stories, but that one takes the cake...er...sandwich.

Do not molest sandwiches, for they have feelings too.

The More You Know.....
 
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