EmeraldBlazer
Registered User
- Joined
- Mar 5, 2012
- Messages
- 7
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Sally was glum and she couldn’t deny it
Her smile wouldn’t come, no matter how hard she’d try it.
The sad that she felt couldn’t be put into words
For a girl 23 and fourteen thirty-thirds.
In the past months, life had ended its ease.
Her college-long boyfriend had found a new squeeze.
The depth of depression made her sniffle and sob,
Which in turn hurt her work, which in turn hurt her job.
With no money or prospects, and in search another,
Sally, making ends meet, moved back in with her mother.
Back to the memories of familial quibbling
And back to the room she once shared with her sibling.
Sally stared out the window, suitcase by her side,
Put her hand on her lower jaw, breathed in, and sighed.
Nothing to make her sing or skip about.
No one to talk to when mother was out.
Sally said to herself, “I want to laugh once more,
Like the happier days I experienced before.”
Then she heard a loud thump that made her concerned
And she looked quickly to see as the closet knob turned.
She stood up at once, and as quickly as that,
Out from the door came The Cat in the Hat.
Sally stepped back and dropped down on the bed
As the cat tipped the hat from the top of his head.
“Hello!” smiled the cat. “It’s been quite some time.
I remember back when you were small as a dime.
You’ve grown up quite lovely, a sight to behold.
Seems like just yesterday. Boy, I sure feel old.”
Sally couldn’t believe it, but it really did seem
That the cat from her youth wasn’t all just a dream.
There he was, straight ahead. Six foot tall (hat included)
“I must be worse than I thought,” Sally softly concluded.
“Nonsense,” said the cat, strutting across to the bed.
“I simply am here because of that thing that you said.
You need cheering up, and I’m here to provide it.
I’ll bring that smile out, no matter how hard you hide it.”
With a snap of his finger and flick of his wrist,
Something appeared in a warm cloud of mist.
A chair, bright and twisty as one chair could be,
Like a chair in the room of the dentist you see.
That cat grabbed Sally’s torso and swung her around
And she fell in that chair, slightly up off the ground.
The cat danced his way over, his smile much greater.
“This is the Hoober-Ha-Ha-Extractator.
“With the push of this button and pull of that lever,
You’ll be the subject of this exciting endeavor.
My advice to you, Sally, are ‘Extractator’ facts:
Loosen up, have some fun, and just try to relax.”
With a push of that button and a couple quick shoves
Several arms came out of the chair, topped with gloves.
They pressed down both arms and they spread out both legs,
A position one wants less than green ham and green eggs.
Before Sally had an idea of what she could do,
She felt a pressure down low by her shoe.
One hand pulled it off, then its twin did the other
Just like a toddler has done by its mother.
Then Sally’s socks were whipped off, short and sweet,
As she felt the cool air on her newly bare feet.
Her leg rest rose high, ankles hanging from end,
With her arms held down tight, nothing left could defend.
Two pie plates arose as the cat pulled his lever.
Every last inch of each carried a feather.
They were rigid, but soft; both cushioned and prickly.
They were coming right at her and spun rather quickly.
It all clicked at once with an audible, “Oh.”
Though she squirmed and she tugged, there was nowhere to go.
She looked at the out-of-her-distance controls
As she felt the tips touch her soft, sensitive soles.
No spot left untickled. Sally gritted her teeth
From these feather-clad things that had come from beneath.
She let out a spurt, and not too long after:
A giggle, a gasp, and then straight, full-on laughter.
She bunched up her toes, but still couldn’t hide them.
Somehow the feathers still worked up inside them.
They whirled and they turned, each one driving her crazy
As she cackled so hard that her head had gone hazy.
They halted, after a few minutes or so.
Sally panted and puffed in dizzy afterglow
But just as she thought that her ordeal was done,
At each of her sides stood Thing 2 and Thing 1.
The gloves lifted her arms up well over her chest
As the mopped-topped Things settled on each side’s armrest.
As her low cut sleeve rolled down, Sally bit on her lip.
She tugged and she tugged, but those gloves would not slip.
They held her in place, stiff and strong as an oar
Sally knew well what she was now in for.
Thing 1 lifted her shirt. With her midriff exposed,
Sally braced herself on the gloves and tightened her toes.
The Things started easy, simple prodding and pokes,
As Sally gasped loudly at their quick little jokes.
They counted each rib, each finger a rover,
But at Sally’s strong laugh, they had to keep starting over.
After thirty one tries, (24 ribs in total)
Sally knew that her underarms were especially immobile.
“Stop now,” said Sally. “You bad Things behave!”
Oh, why pick today of all mornings to shave?
The Things brushed their hair tufts slowly down each arm.
Sally’s eyes bulged like mad, with a look of alarm.
As their swift little fingers danced in her pits,
Sally could hold it no longer and went into fits.
She couldn’t contain it. Her laughs rolled out freely.
There was no way to get out of the Things’ touchy-feely.
And just when Sally felt she was at her wit’s end,
The Things’ rib and arm tag team began to begin.
Sally went crazy and struggled, but that was not that,
She saw at her feet was The Cat in the Hat.
“It’s just what you wanted,” that sly cat explained.
“Your laughter and happiness can’t be contained.”
She knew it was over. She was trapped in that seat
The Things’ kept on at her torso and the cat on her feet.
She snickered and chortled and giggled and squeaked
And hooted and hollered and screamed, howled, and shrieked.
She was manic with laughter as she desperately flopped.
Sally finally accepted the fate could not be stopped.
The cat and his cronies had finally won.
It felt like forever before it finally was done.
The gloves loosened their grip and she rolled onto the floor.
She panted aloud, “I can’t take anymore.”
The chair disappeared. Sally felt a relief.
“Now,” said the cat. “Is the end of your grief.”
Sally crawled to the bed and she laid down to rest.
The Things went in the closet at the cat’s calm behest.
As the door closed behind, she heard the cat’s voice call through,
“Glad we could help you! Tomorrow…”
“Round 2.”
Her smile wouldn’t come, no matter how hard she’d try it.
The sad that she felt couldn’t be put into words
For a girl 23 and fourteen thirty-thirds.
In the past months, life had ended its ease.
Her college-long boyfriend had found a new squeeze.
The depth of depression made her sniffle and sob,
Which in turn hurt her work, which in turn hurt her job.
With no money or prospects, and in search another,
Sally, making ends meet, moved back in with her mother.
Back to the memories of familial quibbling
And back to the room she once shared with her sibling.
Sally stared out the window, suitcase by her side,
Put her hand on her lower jaw, breathed in, and sighed.
Nothing to make her sing or skip about.
No one to talk to when mother was out.
Sally said to herself, “I want to laugh once more,
Like the happier days I experienced before.”
Then she heard a loud thump that made her concerned
And she looked quickly to see as the closet knob turned.
She stood up at once, and as quickly as that,
Out from the door came The Cat in the Hat.
Sally stepped back and dropped down on the bed
As the cat tipped the hat from the top of his head.
“Hello!” smiled the cat. “It’s been quite some time.
I remember back when you were small as a dime.
You’ve grown up quite lovely, a sight to behold.
Seems like just yesterday. Boy, I sure feel old.”
Sally couldn’t believe it, but it really did seem
That the cat from her youth wasn’t all just a dream.
There he was, straight ahead. Six foot tall (hat included)
“I must be worse than I thought,” Sally softly concluded.
“Nonsense,” said the cat, strutting across to the bed.
“I simply am here because of that thing that you said.
You need cheering up, and I’m here to provide it.
I’ll bring that smile out, no matter how hard you hide it.”
With a snap of his finger and flick of his wrist,
Something appeared in a warm cloud of mist.
A chair, bright and twisty as one chair could be,
Like a chair in the room of the dentist you see.
That cat grabbed Sally’s torso and swung her around
And she fell in that chair, slightly up off the ground.
The cat danced his way over, his smile much greater.
“This is the Hoober-Ha-Ha-Extractator.
“With the push of this button and pull of that lever,
You’ll be the subject of this exciting endeavor.
My advice to you, Sally, are ‘Extractator’ facts:
Loosen up, have some fun, and just try to relax.”
With a push of that button and a couple quick shoves
Several arms came out of the chair, topped with gloves.
They pressed down both arms and they spread out both legs,
A position one wants less than green ham and green eggs.
Before Sally had an idea of what she could do,
She felt a pressure down low by her shoe.
One hand pulled it off, then its twin did the other
Just like a toddler has done by its mother.
Then Sally’s socks were whipped off, short and sweet,
As she felt the cool air on her newly bare feet.
Her leg rest rose high, ankles hanging from end,
With her arms held down tight, nothing left could defend.
Two pie plates arose as the cat pulled his lever.
Every last inch of each carried a feather.
They were rigid, but soft; both cushioned and prickly.
They were coming right at her and spun rather quickly.
It all clicked at once with an audible, “Oh.”
Though she squirmed and she tugged, there was nowhere to go.
She looked at the out-of-her-distance controls
As she felt the tips touch her soft, sensitive soles.
No spot left untickled. Sally gritted her teeth
From these feather-clad things that had come from beneath.
She let out a spurt, and not too long after:
A giggle, a gasp, and then straight, full-on laughter.
She bunched up her toes, but still couldn’t hide them.
Somehow the feathers still worked up inside them.
They whirled and they turned, each one driving her crazy
As she cackled so hard that her head had gone hazy.
They halted, after a few minutes or so.
Sally panted and puffed in dizzy afterglow
But just as she thought that her ordeal was done,
At each of her sides stood Thing 2 and Thing 1.
The gloves lifted her arms up well over her chest
As the mopped-topped Things settled on each side’s armrest.
As her low cut sleeve rolled down, Sally bit on her lip.
She tugged and she tugged, but those gloves would not slip.
They held her in place, stiff and strong as an oar
Sally knew well what she was now in for.
Thing 1 lifted her shirt. With her midriff exposed,
Sally braced herself on the gloves and tightened her toes.
The Things started easy, simple prodding and pokes,
As Sally gasped loudly at their quick little jokes.
They counted each rib, each finger a rover,
But at Sally’s strong laugh, they had to keep starting over.
After thirty one tries, (24 ribs in total)
Sally knew that her underarms were especially immobile.
“Stop now,” said Sally. “You bad Things behave!”
Oh, why pick today of all mornings to shave?
The Things brushed their hair tufts slowly down each arm.
Sally’s eyes bulged like mad, with a look of alarm.
As their swift little fingers danced in her pits,
Sally could hold it no longer and went into fits.
She couldn’t contain it. Her laughs rolled out freely.
There was no way to get out of the Things’ touchy-feely.
And just when Sally felt she was at her wit’s end,
The Things’ rib and arm tag team began to begin.
Sally went crazy and struggled, but that was not that,
She saw at her feet was The Cat in the Hat.
“It’s just what you wanted,” that sly cat explained.
“Your laughter and happiness can’t be contained.”
She knew it was over. She was trapped in that seat
The Things’ kept on at her torso and the cat on her feet.
She snickered and chortled and giggled and squeaked
And hooted and hollered and screamed, howled, and shrieked.
She was manic with laughter as she desperately flopped.
Sally finally accepted the fate could not be stopped.
The cat and his cronies had finally won.
It felt like forever before it finally was done.
The gloves loosened their grip and she rolled onto the floor.
She panted aloud, “I can’t take anymore.”
The chair disappeared. Sally felt a relief.
“Now,” said the cat. “Is the end of your grief.”
Sally crawled to the bed and she laid down to rest.
The Things went in the closet at the cat’s calm behest.
As the door closed behind, she heard the cat’s voice call through,
“Glad we could help you! Tomorrow…”
“Round 2.”
