I used to do theater back in my college days. so many great stories from that time. Here's one that recent downloaded into my brain.
I dont remember why, but for some reason I was at the theater 3 hours before a show. The show was student-directed. We'll call her Jane. Jane was the definition of plain (get it?). Not attractive but not ugly, was pale and wore baggy clothes. Jane was there early setting up along with a couple other staff/tech people.
I went into the dressing room to drop off my stuff and make sure my wardrobe was set. I came out from backstage just to relax in the theater and chat/BS a bit, and Jane was laying down on her stomach on stage, arms pulled up and under her head like a pillow, not sure if relaxing or just exhausted.
Being the nice guy I am, I decided to straddle her back and flop down, leading to a "GUUHH!!" Naturally, I started bouncing up and down, each time leading to a “guh” escaping her mouth. She then muttered some comment about me being heavy (at the time, I was pushing 140lbs and my physique was comparable to The Machinist), so I did what any person in my situation would do: used 1 finger from each hand and dug them into her ribs.
The reaction was instant. She had a high pitched squeal followed by a high pitched belly laugh. I made some comment about “what was that again” before using all 5 fingers. Each dig would last 1-2 seconds, each laugh was as high pitched as the previous. I worked my way under her arms and down her sides, torturing her with 1-2 second bursts each time. And not only was she pinned, but she was defenseless as my legs were positioned so she couldn’t pull her arms down.
Desperate to break free, she pulled her leg up and tried to kick out. Big mistake, because I made a quick back grab and locked her ankle in. She was instantly pleading “NO!” before I could do anything. Knowing this would end soon, I quickly pulled off her Vans shoe and her sock. Her initial plea went to “nonononononononono AHHHHHHHHHH!!!” as I dug my fingers into her sole. By far the loudest squeal she let out, and her laughs were equally as high with the non-stop spider tickle assault on her arch, echoing throughout the theater.
At this point, one of the tech people - Meg (who also happened to be one of Jane’s good friends) says “Stop, you’re going to kill her!” I stopped and immediately shot back “do you want to be next?” Jane (still in the recovery laughs) goes “yes! She does! Get her, not me!” Meg just shook her head and walked out of the theater. I looked at Jane and said “but I already have you.” Jane responded with “So? Get her! I’ll help! Just no more! Please!”
Realizing I probably pushed her a little too far as it was, I bent over and whispered “ok - how about when she’s not expecting it – Deal?” Jane just nodded and said “Deal.” I put her sock and shoe back on through her tensed body, obviously expecting a double cross. I bent over, gave her a kiss on the cheek, got up and made sure to help Jane up before giving her a huge hug and an “I’m sorry.” Which turned out to be a mistake because she hit my worst spot – right where the stomach muscle drops and the side muscles begin.
I immediately let out a gasp and a huge laugh before doubling over in defense. Jane just shot a devil smile at me and went “mmm hmm….”
FWIW, yes – we did get Meg, though that’s another story. As is their revenge on me. Both for later.
I dont remember why, but for some reason I was at the theater 3 hours before a show. The show was student-directed. We'll call her Jane. Jane was the definition of plain (get it?). Not attractive but not ugly, was pale and wore baggy clothes. Jane was there early setting up along with a couple other staff/tech people.
I went into the dressing room to drop off my stuff and make sure my wardrobe was set. I came out from backstage just to relax in the theater and chat/BS a bit, and Jane was laying down on her stomach on stage, arms pulled up and under her head like a pillow, not sure if relaxing or just exhausted.
Being the nice guy I am, I decided to straddle her back and flop down, leading to a "GUUHH!!" Naturally, I started bouncing up and down, each time leading to a “guh” escaping her mouth. She then muttered some comment about me being heavy (at the time, I was pushing 140lbs and my physique was comparable to The Machinist), so I did what any person in my situation would do: used 1 finger from each hand and dug them into her ribs.
The reaction was instant. She had a high pitched squeal followed by a high pitched belly laugh. I made some comment about “what was that again” before using all 5 fingers. Each dig would last 1-2 seconds, each laugh was as high pitched as the previous. I worked my way under her arms and down her sides, torturing her with 1-2 second bursts each time. And not only was she pinned, but she was defenseless as my legs were positioned so she couldn’t pull her arms down.
Desperate to break free, she pulled her leg up and tried to kick out. Big mistake, because I made a quick back grab and locked her ankle in. She was instantly pleading “NO!” before I could do anything. Knowing this would end soon, I quickly pulled off her Vans shoe and her sock. Her initial plea went to “nonononononononono AHHHHHHHHHH!!!” as I dug my fingers into her sole. By far the loudest squeal she let out, and her laughs were equally as high with the non-stop spider tickle assault on her arch, echoing throughout the theater.
At this point, one of the tech people - Meg (who also happened to be one of Jane’s good friends) says “Stop, you’re going to kill her!” I stopped and immediately shot back “do you want to be next?” Jane (still in the recovery laughs) goes “yes! She does! Get her, not me!” Meg just shook her head and walked out of the theater. I looked at Jane and said “but I already have you.” Jane responded with “So? Get her! I’ll help! Just no more! Please!”
Realizing I probably pushed her a little too far as it was, I bent over and whispered “ok - how about when she’s not expecting it – Deal?” Jane just nodded and said “Deal.” I put her sock and shoe back on through her tensed body, obviously expecting a double cross. I bent over, gave her a kiss on the cheek, got up and made sure to help Jane up before giving her a huge hug and an “I’m sorry.” Which turned out to be a mistake because she hit my worst spot – right where the stomach muscle drops and the side muscles begin.
I immediately let out a gasp and a huge laugh before doubling over in defense. Jane just shot a devil smile at me and went “mmm hmm….”
FWIW, yes – we did get Meg, though that’s another story. As is their revenge on me. Both for later.
