two_twenty_five
Registered User
- Joined
- Nov 20, 2005
- Messages
- 10
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A hot shower is like a 100% non-diluted adrenaline-laden shot of pure happy. I spent 15 hours straight studying for a restitution exam and I tell you what, a hot shower after that is better than cocaine in getting someone to still give enough of a shit to keep it up the next day.
A hot shower can transform that shitty early morning feeling of "Fuck work/uni!" into a more productive mindset of, "Hell yeah I absolutely wanna sit inside a 5 by 4 cubicle today! Boy, I'm gonna do those tax files so hard. Life is good!"
So in gratitude to God for the divine existence of hot showers, I present to you all, a list of 30 scenarios for which a hot shower is a scientifically proven cure-all remedy:
1. Walking through an open sewer
2. Being an active participant of Valencia's tomato-festival
3. Being groped on public transport
4. You know that wet spot you just sat on? That's not water ...
5. Being part of a crowd of a 3 day open air music festival, during which it rains
6. Visual exposure to any of the following: 2girls1cup, 2kids1sandbox, 1guy1jar etc.
7. It's that time of the month already? Oops.
8. Saying something retarded in class without a hole to sink into
9. You spent all but 30 minutes of that all-nighter googling Japanese tickle porn instead of finishing that essay
10. That essay is due in 30 minutes
11. Collateral damage from female mud-wrestling
12. 5 consecutive days of not showering
13. That chick you like just wants to be friends
14. Seeing your best friend's mum naked
15. Doing your best friend's mum naked
16. Seeing your own mum naked
17. Doin ... no that's going too far
18. Soiling yourself in public during a drunken night out
19. Soiling yourself period
20. 25 consecutive hours of WoW
21. You know that toilet seat you just sat on? It wasn't dry ...
22. 5 hour lecture tomorrow. Why live?
23. For some reason or another you cross swords with another. No, not the metal variety. Applies to guys only.
24. One moment you're a club downing that 5th shot of Jim Bean, the next you're lying in some pumpkin patch. No you didn't travel through time.
25. You overhear someone referring to you as smelly
26. You need a cheaper and less illegal alternative to pep pills
27. You have a sudden urge to see yourself naked and wet
28. You botch a paint job. Hard.
29. Having to sit through the entire duration of 'The Human Centipede'
30. If you're Jack Bauer, according to Jack Bauer facts generator, 20 months of Chinese interrogation
For those who are medically qualified, feel free to add your own!
A hot shower can transform that shitty early morning feeling of "Fuck work/uni!" into a more productive mindset of, "Hell yeah I absolutely wanna sit inside a 5 by 4 cubicle today! Boy, I'm gonna do those tax files so hard. Life is good!"
So in gratitude to God for the divine existence of hot showers, I present to you all, a list of 30 scenarios for which a hot shower is a scientifically proven cure-all remedy:
1. Walking through an open sewer
2. Being an active participant of Valencia's tomato-festival
3. Being groped on public transport
4. You know that wet spot you just sat on? That's not water ...
5. Being part of a crowd of a 3 day open air music festival, during which it rains
6. Visual exposure to any of the following: 2girls1cup, 2kids1sandbox, 1guy1jar etc.
7. It's that time of the month already? Oops.
8. Saying something retarded in class without a hole to sink into
9. You spent all but 30 minutes of that all-nighter googling Japanese tickle porn instead of finishing that essay
10. That essay is due in 30 minutes
11. Collateral damage from female mud-wrestling
12. 5 consecutive days of not showering
13. That chick you like just wants to be friends
14. Seeing your best friend's mum naked
15. Doing your best friend's mum naked
16. Seeing your own mum naked
17. Doin ... no that's going too far
18. Soiling yourself in public during a drunken night out
19. Soiling yourself period
20. 25 consecutive hours of WoW
21. You know that toilet seat you just sat on? It wasn't dry ...
22. 5 hour lecture tomorrow. Why live?
23. For some reason or another you cross swords with another. No, not the metal variety. Applies to guys only.
24. One moment you're a club downing that 5th shot of Jim Bean, the next you're lying in some pumpkin patch. No you didn't travel through time.
25. You overhear someone referring to you as smelly
26. You need a cheaper and less illegal alternative to pep pills
27. You have a sudden urge to see yourself naked and wet
28. You botch a paint job. Hard.
29. Having to sit through the entire duration of 'The Human Centipede'
30. If you're Jack Bauer, according to Jack Bauer facts generator, 20 months of Chinese interrogation
For those who are medically qualified, feel free to add your own!
