Two short stories, but first a question:
What are your thoughts on the idea of "implied consent"? A lot of us like to fantasize about non-consensual situations, but the truth is, if in real life any of us was abducted by a stranger, taken to a remote location, and tickled for torture or interrogation, I imagine we would view it as a severe violation. That's one of the things that make the fantasy kidnappings at NEST so appealing - it allows us to play out a non-consensual scenario in a safe environment, and there is a blanket of implied consent that surrounds that.
Many people are in friendships or relationships where there is implied consent to tickle or be tickled. You don't have to ask or be asked every time, and indeed the element of surprise heightens the experience, but it isn't unwelcome when it happens. I'd be interested in your opinions about things that happen where implied consent isn't there, or whether a boundary is violated in a way, and how you react differently to that (both as a lee and as a ler). I offer two things that happened to me by way of illustration:
Scenario 1) (All names changed to protect various parties). I was in college, hanging out with a group of friends. Among the friends were a girl I had a crush on, "Janet", and another girl who had a crush on me (though I didn't know it yet), "Regina". Also relevant to the story is that Regina and Janet didn't get along.
I don't remember what instigated it, but at one point Regina came over to where I was lying on the floor, sat on my stomach, and started tickling my sides. Normally I would have responded positively to this, but Regina made two critical errors. One, she was quite heavy, so in sitting on my stomach rather than my legs she rendered me unable to breathe not because of ticklish laughter but simply because the weight on my abdomen. Two, since Janet was in the room, I didn't want to appear to be enjoying the physical attention of her rival. So I reacted angrily rather than submissively, which kind of startled Regina. She got off me and never tickled me again.
Scenario 2): (again all names changed). I was dating a girl "Katie". Katie hated being tickled and didn't especially like tickling me, but she knew it turned me on so she would occasionally do it briefly in the context of foreplay. Katie and I hit a rough patch in our relationship, during which we put our physical intimacy on hold. At one point during this rough patch she snuck up on me and tickled my armpits from behind. I reacted unfavorably and she backed off. She said, "I'm sorry, I thought you liked that." And the truth was I did, but given the state of our relationship at the time, it wasn't as welcome as I would like it to have been.
In the first scenario, there was no consent at all, implied or otherwise. In the second, there was implied consent under certain circumstances, but a boundary had still been crossed.
So, Fellow Ticklephiles - have you ever been in situations (again either as a lee or as a ler) where tickling would be welcome under certain conditions, but under the conditions that existed when the tickling actually occurred it was unwelcome and devoid of implied consent?
What are your thoughts on the idea of "implied consent"? A lot of us like to fantasize about non-consensual situations, but the truth is, if in real life any of us was abducted by a stranger, taken to a remote location, and tickled for torture or interrogation, I imagine we would view it as a severe violation. That's one of the things that make the fantasy kidnappings at NEST so appealing - it allows us to play out a non-consensual scenario in a safe environment, and there is a blanket of implied consent that surrounds that.
Many people are in friendships or relationships where there is implied consent to tickle or be tickled. You don't have to ask or be asked every time, and indeed the element of surprise heightens the experience, but it isn't unwelcome when it happens. I'd be interested in your opinions about things that happen where implied consent isn't there, or whether a boundary is violated in a way, and how you react differently to that (both as a lee and as a ler). I offer two things that happened to me by way of illustration:
Scenario 1) (All names changed to protect various parties). I was in college, hanging out with a group of friends. Among the friends were a girl I had a crush on, "Janet", and another girl who had a crush on me (though I didn't know it yet), "Regina". Also relevant to the story is that Regina and Janet didn't get along.
I don't remember what instigated it, but at one point Regina came over to where I was lying on the floor, sat on my stomach, and started tickling my sides. Normally I would have responded positively to this, but Regina made two critical errors. One, she was quite heavy, so in sitting on my stomach rather than my legs she rendered me unable to breathe not because of ticklish laughter but simply because the weight on my abdomen. Two, since Janet was in the room, I didn't want to appear to be enjoying the physical attention of her rival. So I reacted angrily rather than submissively, which kind of startled Regina. She got off me and never tickled me again.
Scenario 2): (again all names changed). I was dating a girl "Katie". Katie hated being tickled and didn't especially like tickling me, but she knew it turned me on so she would occasionally do it briefly in the context of foreplay. Katie and I hit a rough patch in our relationship, during which we put our physical intimacy on hold. At one point during this rough patch she snuck up on me and tickled my armpits from behind. I reacted unfavorably and she backed off. She said, "I'm sorry, I thought you liked that." And the truth was I did, but given the state of our relationship at the time, it wasn't as welcome as I would like it to have been.
In the first scenario, there was no consent at all, implied or otherwise. In the second, there was implied consent under certain circumstances, but a boundary had still been crossed.
So, Fellow Ticklephiles - have you ever been in situations (again either as a lee or as a ler) where tickling would be welcome under certain conditions, but under the conditions that existed when the tickling actually occurred it was unwelcome and devoid of implied consent?
