fatalis112588
Registered User
- Joined
- Apr 9, 2008
- Messages
- 7
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- 0
Greetings and salutations fellow members. I usually don't say much in regard of anything, being a generic lurker and all. Today, though, I needed to vent something I can't really say to anyone who knows me.
I have been single for quite some time, not without lack of effort of course. I am on the heavier side weight wise, and a total nerd. Talking video games and anime and everything in between. This has not made it easy on my attempts at courtship, as finding a woman around my age (mid 20's) that enjoys even a few of my hobbies and pastimes is severely difficult.
Now comes the real kicker. My best friend, who I have not only have known for 6 years, but has actively been trying to help me, from setting up blind dates to motivational support. He is an amazing friend, and that makes this next bit all the worse.
He is engaged to who I believe is the most amazing woman I have ever met. Fun, witty, and into everything aforementioned. (good luck finding a woman who actually plays Dark Souls 2) Between the lack of success in my life, and his continuing success in his, not only have I begun getting jealous, but I can't keep myself from lusting after his Fiancee. I can clearly tell the difference between love and lust, but it is literally driving me crazy lately, to the point where I sometimes think I have been spending time with them just to be around her. We are all planning to move into a house together, since having three peoples income will make everything easier, but I might go insane or do something unforgivable when the time comes. I have even considered prostitution, thinking that maybe ending my dry spell would put an end to this. I really am lost right now, and I have no idea what to do.
They are family to me, and I know that there is no better friends than they are. I don't want to tell them about this, and I can't really discuss this with actual family or other friends due to the sensitivity of the topic. I don't really expect answers, or advice, as I am hoping that venting my frustrations will be enough for the moment to ease my troubled mind. If you feel you can share nuggets of wisdom, I will not shrug away free help. Thank you all for listening and I hope your days are going better at least.
I have been single for quite some time, not without lack of effort of course. I am on the heavier side weight wise, and a total nerd. Talking video games and anime and everything in between. This has not made it easy on my attempts at courtship, as finding a woman around my age (mid 20's) that enjoys even a few of my hobbies and pastimes is severely difficult.
Now comes the real kicker. My best friend, who I have not only have known for 6 years, but has actively been trying to help me, from setting up blind dates to motivational support. He is an amazing friend, and that makes this next bit all the worse.
He is engaged to who I believe is the most amazing woman I have ever met. Fun, witty, and into everything aforementioned. (good luck finding a woman who actually plays Dark Souls 2) Between the lack of success in my life, and his continuing success in his, not only have I begun getting jealous, but I can't keep myself from lusting after his Fiancee. I can clearly tell the difference between love and lust, but it is literally driving me crazy lately, to the point where I sometimes think I have been spending time with them just to be around her. We are all planning to move into a house together, since having three peoples income will make everything easier, but I might go insane or do something unforgivable when the time comes. I have even considered prostitution, thinking that maybe ending my dry spell would put an end to this. I really am lost right now, and I have no idea what to do.
They are family to me, and I know that there is no better friends than they are. I don't want to tell them about this, and I can't really discuss this with actual family or other friends due to the sensitivity of the topic. I don't really expect answers, or advice, as I am hoping that venting my frustrations will be enough for the moment to ease my troubled mind. If you feel you can share nuggets of wisdom, I will not shrug away free help. Thank you all for listening and I hope your days are going better at least.