DDD,
Ahoy to ye as well.
As for confusing love and lust, I find it difficult to separate them. For me, tickling is all about expressing love and affection. Also, I might find someone attractive, but then become totally repulsed by their personality, and then I couldn't lust after them if you paid me. In the case of the women you mention, the factors that annoy me completely outweigh whatever appeal they may have once had physically.
From the short list here, I would have to pick Britney Spears as the one I would least want to tickle. To me, she is the embodiment of several dismaying trends that irritate me to no end. (Popularizing the "underage *****" look among our youth; making pop music into a product to attach a Brand Name to, rather than an artform; and being considered the Most Desirable Woman Ever more through marketing than merit.)
My own choice as woman I'd least like to tickle is Kathy Najimy, especially as she appeared in Sister Act. This is not due to her weight, but rather the fact that in this film she looks exactly like my mother. I read Oedipus Rex, and it didn't work out for him. Thus, good, bad or otherwise, any woman who resembles my mother is immediately disqualified from the game.