yo mama

[t s s]

Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."

Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."

Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.

Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower

Yo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.

Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck

Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.

Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras

Yo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her

Yo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak around her neck to get the dogs to play with her.

Yo mama so ugly when she walks down the street in September, people say "Wow, is it Halloween already?"

Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday.

Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.

Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints.

Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry.

Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower!

Yo mama so ugly when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours. . .for a quote!

Yo mama so ugly they put her in dough and made monster cookies!

Yo mama so ugly she tried to take a bath the water jumped out!

Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and gets arrested!

Yo mama so ugly even Rice Krispies won't talk to her!

Yo mama so ugly Ted Dansen wouldn't date her!

Yo mama so ugly for Halloween she trick or treats on the phone!

Yo mama so ugly she turned Medusa to stone!

Yo mama so ugly The NHL banned her for life

Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween!

Yo mama so ugly the government moved Halloween to her birthday!

Yo mama so ugly if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects!

Yo mama so ugly they pay her to put her clothes on in strip joints

Yo mama so ugly she made an onion cry!

Yo mama so ugly people go as her for Halloween.

Yo mama so ugly that when she sits in the sand on the beach, cats try to bury her.

Yo mama so ugly she scares the roaches away.

Yo mama so ugly we have to tie a steak around your neck so the dog will play with her!

Yo mama so ugly I heard that your dad first met her at the pound.

Yo mama so ugly that if ugly were bricks she'd have her own projects.

Yo mama so ugly that your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn't have to kiss her goodbye.

 

[Limeoutsider]

Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
[/B]

ROFLAMO!

 

[Limeoutsider]

Yo momma's so fat, when she gets in an elevator, she can only go down.

Yo momma's so fat, she could sell shade.

Yo momma's so fat, people jog around her for exercise.

Yo momma's so fat, she gets runs in her jeans.

Yo momma's so fat, when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.

Yo momma's so fat, they had to let out the shower curtain.

Yo momma so fat she eats Wheat Thicks.

Yo momma so fat she went to the movies and sat next to everyone.

Yo momma's so fat, she can't even jump to a conclusion.

Yo momma so fat that when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch
marks.

Yo momma so fat when she wears a Malcolm X T-shirt, helicopters try to
land on her back.

Yo momma so fat that her graduation picture was an aerial photograph!

Yo momma so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized

Yo momma so fat she's on both sides of the family!

Yo momma so fat she went on a date with high heels on and came back
with sandals!!!

Yo momma's so fat she was zoned for commercial development.

Yo momma so fat she looks like she's smuggling a Volkswagen.

Yo momma so ugly she'd scare a buzzard off a gut wagon.

Yo momma so ugly she looks like she's been bobbing for french fries!

Yo momma so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the cameras

Yo momma so ugly that when she sits on the beach, cats try to bury her.

Yo momma's so ugly, when she looks in the mirror, the reflection ducks.

Yo momma so ugly when she entered an ugly contest, they said "Sorry,
no professionals."

Yo momma so short you can see her feet on her driver's license!

Yo momma's house is so dirty she has to wipe her feet before she goes
outside.

Yo momma head so small that she got her ear pierced and died.

Yo momma lips so big, Chap Stick had to invent a spray.

Yo momma arms are so short, she has to tilt her head to scratch her ear.

Yo momma so dumb she thought that TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday

Yo momma so dumb she got locked in a grocery store and starved to
death

Yo momma so dumb she sent me a fax with a stamp on it

Yo momma so dumb she thought Boyz II Men was a day care center

Yo momma so dumb she thought Meow Mix was a record for cats

Yo momma so dumb she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store

Yo momma so dumb she sold the car for gas money

Yo momma so dumb when she went to the movies, and they said "under
17 not admitted" she went home and got 16 friends

Yo momma so dumb when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur in the home,
she moved

Yo momma so dumb when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus
twice instead

Yo momma so dumb when she saw the sign that said, "Airport Left" she
turned around and went home.

Yo momma's so fat, when she dances, she makes the band skip.

Yo momma's so fat, she puts mayonnaise on aspirin.

Yo momma's so fat, her cereal bowl came with a lifeguard.

Yo momma's so fat, the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot dogs.

Yo momma's so fat, she has to iron her pants on the driveway.

Yo momma's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant, she doesn't get a
menu, she gets an estimate.

Yo momma's so fat, when she ran away, they had to use all four sides of
the milk carton.

Yo momma's so fat, when she got her shoes shined, she had to take his
word for it.

Yo momma is so ugly for Halloween she can trick-or-treat over the
telephone!

Yo momma is so poor when I saw her kicking a can down the street, I
asked her what she was doing, she said "Moving."

Yo momma's so poor when she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken, she
has to lick other people's fingers!!!

Yo momma's so poor when I ring the doorbell she says,"DING!"

Yo momma 's so poor she went to McDonald's and put a milkshake on
layaway.

Your momma's underarms are so hairy, she looks like she has
somebody in a headlock.

Your momma is so ugly, if my dog looked like that, I'd shave his butt and walk him backwards.

Yo momma so nasty she joined the four horseman: war, death, famine,
disease and Yo momma!

Yo momma's so dumb she went up on your roof because they said
drinks were on the house!

Yo momma's so dumb she got fired from the M&M factory for throwing
out the W's!

Yo momma's so dumb she only changed your diapers once a month
because it said on the box "good for up to 20 pounds"!

 

[t s s]

lmfao x 2!!😀 😱

 

[grippedchimp]

Can only think of one right now. This one's for the Brits...

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow, I Can't Believe It's Not Butter!