I've heard about the traditional stages of grief, starting with shock, then denial and so on. But there's something new for me: I'm bitter as well as angry, very angry, as well as sad as I've been for quite some time now.
Can anyone help me make sense of it? Why? Why was the love of my life taken from me so young? I know, I'm not the first person this has ever happened to and "Stacey" is certainly not the first person ever to felled by inoperable cancer at barely the halfway point in her life. But to contemplate how wonderful she was, how lucky I was to have even met her in the first place, and online at that--it was quite the minor miracle considering the World Wide Web was only a couple of years old at the time--what sunshine and comfort she brought into my life and the lives of others, I just can't accept that it's happened.
One of the things that hurts the most is to think that she never got the chance to be the wonderful grandmother I know she would have been, just as she was such a loving mother and wife and just a fantastic person, as so many reminded me of after she passed. There are so many absolute scumbags around; why couldn't one of them have been afflicted and so justly removed from this world instead of my Stacey??
Can anyone help me make sense of it? Why? Why was the love of my life taken from me so young? I know, I'm not the first person this has ever happened to and "Stacey" is certainly not the first person ever to felled by inoperable cancer at barely the halfway point in her life. But to contemplate how wonderful she was, how lucky I was to have even met her in the first place, and online at that--it was quite the minor miracle considering the World Wide Web was only a couple of years old at the time--what sunshine and comfort she brought into my life and the lives of others, I just can't accept that it's happened.
One of the things that hurts the most is to think that she never got the chance to be the wonderful grandmother I know she would have been, just as she was such a loving mother and wife and just a fantastic person, as so many reminded me of after she passed. There are so many absolute scumbags around; why couldn't one of them have been afflicted and so justly removed from this world instead of my Stacey??
