College is a lot like lining up 3 hamsters on wheels and trying to get them to power a printer that shoots a diploma out. One of the hamsters is constantly working, he's got the Rocky theme songs in his head, and he just keeps on going. One of the hamsters is kind of interested, like, he likes watching the paper move through the printer, but he also likes going off and doing other things, like taking a walk or watching TV or posting useless blog entries. The 3rd hamster has a terrible hangover and is running in the wrong direction. And then suddenly a mound of textbooks descend onto the hamsters and they run for their lives, abandoning the wheels and leaving you to turn the wheels with your fingers or toes or whatever.
That's college.
So anyway, I live in a dorm now. There are people having sex in the room next to me. I can tell because they keep ramming into the wall against the bed. You don't really sleep in college, you just convince yourself to temporarily die until class starts the next morning, at which point you are resurrected by the wizard living under your bed who hates you and takes pictures of your girlfriend while she's changing. Creepy old wizard.
So, to summarize:
Hamsters, Textbooks, Wall Sex, Wizard
That's college.
So anyway, I live in a dorm now. There are people having sex in the room next to me. I can tell because they keep ramming into the wall against the bed. You don't really sleep in college, you just convince yourself to temporarily die until class starts the next morning, at which point you are resurrected by the wizard living under your bed who hates you and takes pictures of your girlfriend while she's changing. Creepy old wizard.
So, to summarize:
Hamsters, Textbooks, Wall Sex, Wizard
