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Online Dating Messaging

"It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and then don't say it." - Sam Levenson

Are you reading this? It's very helpful. I'm going to go eat cake and finish this post later.

Okay has returned 🙂 now, online messages. Do people know what they are doing? Is it hard to write a good message? Are we struggling a bit here? hmmm perhaps. Perhaps it's hard to think of the best way to approach a person via an online message. I want to help so here are some tips 🙂

Do not ever ever ever ever say, "ask me something," or "say something," or "what are you thinking" or anything simliar to this. Some girls are open to playing a question game where you ask something and then they ask something, but that's hardly impressive. The truth is, guys who use these tactics in conversing online are not making a good impression. It interprits as something like this: "Hey pay me attention and prove that you find me interesting because i'm too bored and lazy to think of anything cool. Also i'm not really interested in asking you questions first, so why dont you be interested in me for a while first."

Do not ever assume that a girl is ignoring you. Girls get millions of messages a day, and it takes time to read through everything. Give her a couple of days to reply! She might have been at work all day, then answered 20 messages, gone to bed and done the same thing the next day. She'll get to you eventually. If she doesn't repond in 3 days,send her a gentle reminder saying, "hey you're probably busy with a bunch of guys messaging you or something, but hope i hear from you when you can." And if you dont hear from her in another three days, write her off as uninterested and move on. It's all apples and oranges out there- if you're an apple, and she wants an orange well that's just bad luck. But dont take it personally.

Do not ever bring up sex in the first few messages. This girl doesn't know you from a bar of soap and doesn't know you are only joking or playing around. She can't determine the difference between your dirty minded sense of humour or if you just want to fuck her and leave her. If you want any chance here, talking about sex is not the way to go.

Do not evers suggest that she comes over for a movie night as a first meeting. Do not offer her a massage either. Dude, this is the sort of stuff you talk about AFTER you meet her. We're not stupid. These things have been used as code for let's make-out for years. I dont care if you honest to god want a movie night, and genuinely want to offer a massage either... girls will read into these two things because i can guarantee 99% of the guys in their past who have suggested these things have used it to get in their pants.

Do not ever start off with hot issues like, "why are you against drugs but you still drink?" or "why does your profile have so much reference to tickling for?" .... i'd steer clear of WHY questions just to be safe, unless you're sure it's a safe topic. This is because the tone of why questions can be misinterpritted as negative quite easily. Ask her what, where, when and how questions 🙂 and dont forget those paralinguistic cues 🙂

Do not ever USE ALL CAPS. PEOPLE GENERALLY DONT RESPOND TO THESE MESSAGES. ESPECIALLY IF YOUR SPELLING IZ SUMTHN LYK DIS. i mean you've heard it all before i'm sure, but you would be suprised how many guys try to get responses with these messages anyway.

Do not ever send long messages. Try to keep it at a paragraph, because anything more is tiring for a girl who has just read several messages and then reaches your one, only to find an essay. If you want to impress her with your writing skills, use your vocabulary and be concise.

Do not ever talk heaps about yourself. I recently sat through a phone call where this guy just went on and on about himself and his plans and his ex and his day and his hopes and his thoughts and i never got a word in. All everyone ever wants is to talk about themselves. Which is fair enough, but if you want to give a good impression- satisfy the other person's need to be heard! Ask them open ended questions. don't know what an open ended question is? google it.

Comments

I know the feeling. I went to bed at 6am and Jo called almost 2 hours later saying "WAKE UP BITCH BWHAHAHAH". She lovessss waking me up, but the fact she bears with me for the first 10 minutes of not comprehending a g'd damn thing she is saying is aces. As much as it sucks, it's my favorite way to wake up. :bubbleheart:
 
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@ twinny - :slapfight:

@ Krazie Jay - Aww, sounds like typical Jo. 😀 God love her. :redheart: ...or no one else will! lmao j/k XD >:3
 
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ticklechambers
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