I just got into a huge fight with one of my coworkers. I really thought she was going to be quitting, and I was THRILLED (which is strange because we get along really well the rest of the time). So, I was pissed off and complaining about her for like a week. I was so mad and frustrated thinking who the fuck does this bitch think she is?
So then one thing led to another and I could see the explosion getting ready. We were throwing jabs at eachother and little zings on facebook, then she finally stepped to me and was like, okay here we go. I thought the shit was gonna really hit the fan. Then I realized that not only is she a friend of mine, but we're both way more mature than the bitchy, catty argument we were about to get into. So we agreed to take a deep breath and just get it all out on the table. We were 100% honest and said things and expressed opinions that hurt the other person. But at the end of the day, we were able to appreciate eachother's points of view and explain away some of the bad feelings that had been the result of simple misunderstandings.
I haven't really gotten into an argument with anyone I care about in a long time. Usually if I'm mad at someone I just avoid them. Not because I want to give them the silent treatment or I hate them, but because I hate being in uncomfortable situations with people I care about. I hate having to admit to myself that they're mad at me and I'm mad at them and life isn't all rainbows and butterflies, if even for a moment.
It was nice to get into an argument with somebody and resolve it with good old fashioned one-on-one talking. It felt amazing to be able to express myself honestly and have the other person validate my feelings either by explaining, from their perspective, what had led to those feelings and/or what we would do to prevent it from happening again. That doesn't happen nearly often enough.
So then one thing led to another and I could see the explosion getting ready. We were throwing jabs at eachother and little zings on facebook, then she finally stepped to me and was like, okay here we go. I thought the shit was gonna really hit the fan. Then I realized that not only is she a friend of mine, but we're both way more mature than the bitchy, catty argument we were about to get into. So we agreed to take a deep breath and just get it all out on the table. We were 100% honest and said things and expressed opinions that hurt the other person. But at the end of the day, we were able to appreciate eachother's points of view and explain away some of the bad feelings that had been the result of simple misunderstandings.
I haven't really gotten into an argument with anyone I care about in a long time. Usually if I'm mad at someone I just avoid them. Not because I want to give them the silent treatment or I hate them, but because I hate being in uncomfortable situations with people I care about. I hate having to admit to myself that they're mad at me and I'm mad at them and life isn't all rainbows and butterflies, if even for a moment.
It was nice to get into an argument with somebody and resolve it with good old fashioned one-on-one talking. It felt amazing to be able to express myself honestly and have the other person validate my feelings either by explaining, from their perspective, what had led to those feelings and/or what we would do to prevent it from happening again. That doesn't happen nearly often enough.
