This is going to be a bit of a rant. I've been measured about posting rants in recent years, but I want to say this.
Has anyone ever experienced where doctors were just complete and utter assholes, and inhumane? Throughout my mom's whole cancer situation thus far, there is not one doctor I have met, who has been providing any hope, or comfort.
On the day my mom had her bronchoscophy, the Dr came out into the waiting room, showed me two Xrays of my mom's lungs with the cancer, and then just left. A bit later, in the recovery room, mom asked to talk to the Dr, so he called her on the phone, and she said he was very cold. The next day, one of the doctors came into mom's room at the hospital, and said "You have lung cancer", and then just left, before we could ask any questions.
Even our personal physican, who we know for six years, has been a total dick. When I went to see him for my BP checkup, the week after it was revealed my mom has cancer, we started talking about her situation. Instead of saying to mom "Sheila, we're going to do everything possible to save your life". He said to me "Mitch, I know it's hard, but you're going to have to be "realistic". At that point, they didn't even have any of my mom's test results back yet, from the three tests she has taken, nor did they discuss a treatment plan as yet. How the fuck did he know what "Realistic" was, or wasnt, when he hadn't even freaking seen her test results! When I went off to my father about this, his explanation was that they are just trying to cover their asses, from the family suing them for malpractice, if they say mom's going to be okay, and then she heaven forbid dies.
I'm not stupid. I've read all the "statistics" about lung cancer. I know that my mom has a long, hard road ahead, and I will be there with her every step of the way. I just think that if I was a doctor dealing with an old woman with lung cancer, I would be a bit more comforting, not walk into someone's room and say "You have lung cancer", and then walk out, or say to that person's son "We dont like to see this, your mother has lung cancer", and then just walk away, without even saying "I'm sorry", or "We're going to do everything to fight this". Or "Do you have any questions, Mitch?"
I'm so pissed at my personal doctor right now, that, if I was planning on living here for any length of time, I'd change doctors.
Our family doctor when we lived in NJ was very kind. He treated my grandmother, my mom, me, and my aunts. When my grandmother was in the hospital with kidney failure, he was very supportive. One of his partners told me at one point, in a cold tone, that my grandmother had a week to live, and I felt like I wanted to punch that guy in the nose. However, the night before my grandmother died, and the morning that she did die, our personal doctor was very humane. As it turned out, my grandmother died at 645 in the morning, and my mom had her phone shut off. The doctor left a message saying "Sheila, Mitch, call me as soon as possible", and my mom said that when she did call, the doctor was very nice, and said something like "I'm sorry, Sheila, your mother passed at 645 this morning, my sincere condolences to you and Mitch". Human.
Anyhow, so thats it. I cant question the competency of the doctors, even though mom is going to go for a second opinion. I just think that when doctors are dealing with patients and familes with life threatening illnesses, they should learn to be more humane, and not so cold, realizing that the person with the illness, and their familes are going through the worst time of life, and they need to hear a bit more humanity then "You have to be realistic". or, "Your mother has cancer", without seeing the human side of it of how THEY would feel if they or one of their loved ones, was told such news.
Has anyone ever experienced where doctors were just complete and utter assholes, and inhumane? Throughout my mom's whole cancer situation thus far, there is not one doctor I have met, who has been providing any hope, or comfort.
On the day my mom had her bronchoscophy, the Dr came out into the waiting room, showed me two Xrays of my mom's lungs with the cancer, and then just left. A bit later, in the recovery room, mom asked to talk to the Dr, so he called her on the phone, and she said he was very cold. The next day, one of the doctors came into mom's room at the hospital, and said "You have lung cancer", and then just left, before we could ask any questions.
Even our personal physican, who we know for six years, has been a total dick. When I went to see him for my BP checkup, the week after it was revealed my mom has cancer, we started talking about her situation. Instead of saying to mom "Sheila, we're going to do everything possible to save your life". He said to me "Mitch, I know it's hard, but you're going to have to be "realistic". At that point, they didn't even have any of my mom's test results back yet, from the three tests she has taken, nor did they discuss a treatment plan as yet. How the fuck did he know what "Realistic" was, or wasnt, when he hadn't even freaking seen her test results! When I went off to my father about this, his explanation was that they are just trying to cover their asses, from the family suing them for malpractice, if they say mom's going to be okay, and then she heaven forbid dies.
I'm not stupid. I've read all the "statistics" about lung cancer. I know that my mom has a long, hard road ahead, and I will be there with her every step of the way. I just think that if I was a doctor dealing with an old woman with lung cancer, I would be a bit more comforting, not walk into someone's room and say "You have lung cancer", and then walk out, or say to that person's son "We dont like to see this, your mother has lung cancer", and then just walk away, without even saying "I'm sorry", or "We're going to do everything to fight this". Or "Do you have any questions, Mitch?"
I'm so pissed at my personal doctor right now, that, if I was planning on living here for any length of time, I'd change doctors.
Our family doctor when we lived in NJ was very kind. He treated my grandmother, my mom, me, and my aunts. When my grandmother was in the hospital with kidney failure, he was very supportive. One of his partners told me at one point, in a cold tone, that my grandmother had a week to live, and I felt like I wanted to punch that guy in the nose. However, the night before my grandmother died, and the morning that she did die, our personal doctor was very humane. As it turned out, my grandmother died at 645 in the morning, and my mom had her phone shut off. The doctor left a message saying "Sheila, Mitch, call me as soon as possible", and my mom said that when she did call, the doctor was very nice, and said something like "I'm sorry, Sheila, your mother passed at 645 this morning, my sincere condolences to you and Mitch". Human.
Anyhow, so thats it. I cant question the competency of the doctors, even though mom is going to go for a second opinion. I just think that when doctors are dealing with patients and familes with life threatening illnesses, they should learn to be more humane, and not so cold, realizing that the person with the illness, and their familes are going through the worst time of life, and they need to hear a bit more humanity then "You have to be realistic". or, "Your mother has cancer", without seeing the human side of it of how THEY would feel if they or one of their loved ones, was told such news.
