As the blog telling about my life demonstrated, I'm a very strong person, usually like the Rock of Gibraltar. Now, in spite of my mom's urging that we take life one day at a time, and my vow to support her, I feel like I'm going to crack.
I'm facing my mom's illness, treatment, and the fear that she may pass away short term. I'm facing my father, and his abuse, and my own health issues, and high blood pressure, and now, today, due to his actions this weekend, my mom now says she wants to immediately go back to court with him, to try and appeal to the court to make him pay monetarially for his blackmail, and threats, and keeping her out of court for 15 years.
I want to make one thing perfectly clear: I WILL stand by my mom, no matter what course she takes, and no matter what treatment she faces, or care she needs. As I've stated many times before, I love her to the end of the earth. It's just: Through all the threats, horrors, and life reversals we went through as a result of the actions of my father, and the courts, mom and I held each other tight, and took our hits. Now, I have to hold her tight, and she may not be able to help me. I have to help her 100%. I'm absolutely terrified about what happens on the other side of this dark tunnel she and I seem to be in.
My mom tells me that we are both very strong people, to adapt to the horrors caused us by my father and the courts, and to adjust to downward mobility, with grace. As long as we had each other, and the necessities of life, it didn't matter where I was with her. I hope and pray every night that she fights and survives this illness, but I worry, what will Mitch's emotional and physical state be like during, and heaven forbid, after, if she does not survive.
Someone, please, help me find perspective. The Rock of Gibraltar is cracking, and I cant crack now, or my mom loses, the one person who needs to help her fight the biggest battle of her life.
Mitch
I'm facing my mom's illness, treatment, and the fear that she may pass away short term. I'm facing my father, and his abuse, and my own health issues, and high blood pressure, and now, today, due to his actions this weekend, my mom now says she wants to immediately go back to court with him, to try and appeal to the court to make him pay monetarially for his blackmail, and threats, and keeping her out of court for 15 years.
I want to make one thing perfectly clear: I WILL stand by my mom, no matter what course she takes, and no matter what treatment she faces, or care she needs. As I've stated many times before, I love her to the end of the earth. It's just: Through all the threats, horrors, and life reversals we went through as a result of the actions of my father, and the courts, mom and I held each other tight, and took our hits. Now, I have to hold her tight, and she may not be able to help me. I have to help her 100%. I'm absolutely terrified about what happens on the other side of this dark tunnel she and I seem to be in.
My mom tells me that we are both very strong people, to adapt to the horrors caused us by my father and the courts, and to adjust to downward mobility, with grace. As long as we had each other, and the necessities of life, it didn't matter where I was with her. I hope and pray every night that she fights and survives this illness, but I worry, what will Mitch's emotional and physical state be like during, and heaven forbid, after, if she does not survive.
Someone, please, help me find perspective. The Rock of Gibraltar is cracking, and I cant crack now, or my mom loses, the one person who needs to help her fight the biggest battle of her life.
Mitch
