On Wednesday, I was summoned to lunch at Shun Lee Palace by my father. Unfortunately for me, I had a case of the verbal runs, so to speak, and got myself into hot water. This is completely unusual, considering the only meaningful thing about me that my father knows, is that I watch Jim Gardner every night, and he cant even respect THAT, as he calls me during Gardner's news, even though I ask him not to.
Anyway, so.. during lunch.. he asked me if I was "Finally ready to deal with myself, by talking to someone". (A shrink) Not a very encouraging way to put it. I told him no, that talking to a therapist isnt going to bring my mom back, or cure my broken heart. Somehow, I dont remember how the conversation came up, but.. he also mentioned the subject of my meeting someone (A female). My reply might not make me too popular. I said something like "What for, so I can have some complaining pain in the ass who tells me I suck all the time". He told me that was a very dim and negative view. Reality is, I dont have good relationships in my family to draw on. My two sets of grandparents, while married for life, had very troubled marriages. I come from a divorced home. My uncle is divorced once, and has a troubled second marriage. My two aunts are both divorced, and one aunt is living in an abusive marriage. (Her third)
All I want now is to continue keeping myself busy with my friends Jim Gardner, and the things I enjoy. I'm hoping to have my business up and running by the end of the year. I love going to Acqueduct with my friend Barney. I've come to the conclusion why. its not to gamble.. or lose money, because most often I control myself and end up breaking even, or losing just a little. I explained to my dad that I find watching horses exciting, and I think he understands that. I couldnt be like some guys there who go every day, but.. once I get the business running, I'd love to still go once a week.
To force myself to be involved with someone now wouldnt be fair to me, or the perspective girl. Then of course theres the problem he doesnt know. Anyone who knows what I'm truly into, knows I would be miserable if I met a girl who refused to let me play with her feet, or tickle her..
For now, my top priority has to be getting my business running, and maybe making a new friend or two. Besides that, I dont feel ready for a relationship by any stretch of the imagination.
Mitch
Anyway, so.. during lunch.. he asked me if I was "Finally ready to deal with myself, by talking to someone". (A shrink) Not a very encouraging way to put it. I told him no, that talking to a therapist isnt going to bring my mom back, or cure my broken heart. Somehow, I dont remember how the conversation came up, but.. he also mentioned the subject of my meeting someone (A female). My reply might not make me too popular. I said something like "What for, so I can have some complaining pain in the ass who tells me I suck all the time". He told me that was a very dim and negative view. Reality is, I dont have good relationships in my family to draw on. My two sets of grandparents, while married for life, had very troubled marriages. I come from a divorced home. My uncle is divorced once, and has a troubled second marriage. My two aunts are both divorced, and one aunt is living in an abusive marriage. (Her third)
All I want now is to continue keeping myself busy with my friends Jim Gardner, and the things I enjoy. I'm hoping to have my business up and running by the end of the year. I love going to Acqueduct with my friend Barney. I've come to the conclusion why. its not to gamble.. or lose money, because most often I control myself and end up breaking even, or losing just a little. I explained to my dad that I find watching horses exciting, and I think he understands that. I couldnt be like some guys there who go every day, but.. once I get the business running, I'd love to still go once a week.
To force myself to be involved with someone now wouldnt be fair to me, or the perspective girl. Then of course theres the problem he doesnt know. Anyone who knows what I'm truly into, knows I would be miserable if I met a girl who refused to let me play with her feet, or tickle her..
For now, my top priority has to be getting my business running, and maybe making a new friend or two. Besides that, I dont feel ready for a relationship by any stretch of the imagination.
Mitch
