Warning: This blog is going to seriously sound like the dumbest shit you've ever heard. It's like high school all over again ...
Tonight was Red, White, and Boom in downtown Columbus and I was pretty excited for it. My friend Clare and I went down together and met up with 3 of our other friends. The night sounded promising.
I was wrong.
I texted my friend Josh to see if he was going too. He said he was and that he was going to be with his girlfriend, and 2 other people that hate Clare and I. It's all good though. Well we were texting back and forth about meeting up and things were going fine. I have not seen Josh in FOREVER and I was so excited to finally see him. He was supposed to call me or text me when he got to High Street. He never did. I tried calling him and it rang a couple of times and went to his voicemail. He obviously had his phone with him and just wasn't answering.
It's just all so dumb because after my last blog about Josh and whatnot he actually DID text me back. We started talking and he wanted to start hanging out again. So why did he totally blow me and Clare off tonight? I understand that probably the 2 people that don't like us didn't want to meet up, but at least a simple text from Josh saying he couldn't meet up because he didn't want there to be any tension and that we could hang out some other time. But no. He just acted like he was going to see us and then BAM! Nothing. I just don't understand it.
And well if that wasn't enough blowing off for the night it happened not once ... but twice more.
My friends that Clare and I had hung out with earlier did pretty much the same thing. They left while me and Clare were eating and said we would meet up later. So after we're done eating I text one of them asking where they are. They say they are by this band... so we go there and they aren't there. So I text again and ask them where they are. Now they are by the ice skating rink. I didn't know where that is so I sent a text asking where ... no response. I tried calling ... voicemail.
So naturally at this point Clare and I are pretty pissed off. What is going on with our friends? We understand that it's super crowded, but it's not that hard to stay in one place and wait. I don't get why the texting would be pretty back and forth and then just stop. It seriously makes no sense to me. If you know someone is trying to find you wouldn't you try a little harder to keep in contact? Apparently not?
The third time... we saw some of our friends as we were walking to find my other friends. They wanted us to meet up later so we could all watch fireworks together. I text my friend asking where she is because we are pretty much lost. She says she is on the corner of Neil and Long. I have no idea where the heck that is. All I knew was that we were on Vine and High ... so I text her that and I get no response. Blow off #3.
Clare and I came to the conclusion that we honestly just lost all of our "friends". I mean it's whatever at this point because once you start to realize how highschool this all is [and yes I realize it] you just stop giving a shit about it. Why should I feel bad because you're treating me like shit? All I know is friends don't treat each other like this and there is no way in hell I'm dealing with this anymore.
I think what really topped my night was my friend Tom. He was the second one to blow me off. I've known him since 7th grade and we've always been close friends. [7th and 8th grade year I liked him and told him that I liked him and he rejected me.. twice ..we make fun about it now though.] Earlier that day when we met up with them at a restaurant ... he was acting strange. It's really complicated to explain this without going into a million other details, but basically since Senior year I'm almost positive he has developed feelings for me, but he refuses to admit it. Like I said ... complicated. But tonight he did something I wasn't really expecting...
We were all sitting at the table and Clare got up to go to the bathroom. So it was me, Tom ,and 2 of our other friends. Tom is a person who jokes around about everything [but he knows when to be serious]. He's a good guy. Like I said earlier he always makes fun of how I used to like him. Well today, he makes the comment, "Amy ... if you were my girlfriend I would play with your hair." And then he played with my hair. I just laughed and rolled my eyes. Then he says, "Can you ever even imagine us... you know?" And I was like, "What ... dating?" And he said, "No ... having sex. It'd be so weird because I am like a brother to you." I was like, "Uh yeah I know ..." and then just laughed because seriously what else was I supposed to do? He brings up that shit all the time. Then, out of nowhere he grabs my hand and just holds it. Now usually he would be joking around in front of his friends and whatnot ... he didn't this time though. He just grabbed my hand, held it for a little bit, and then let go. Weirdest thing ever.
I know this all sounds like so high school and to be honest it kind of was. My whole night was like a day in the life of a high school sophomore or something. It was pathetic. I feel like I should have written about this like 3 years ago and it would make more sense. But here I am ... 19 and still having high school drama.
When I saw Slacker and his girlfriend Stacy the other night they made me realize that my life is not as bad as I make it out to be. And they are 100% right. I bitch and complain about the stupidest shit when in reality my life is not as bad as it could be. And I definitely don't have it as awful as other people in the world. I guess I just like to write my feelings out and I make it seem like it's the biggest deal in the world, but I've come to see that things like what happened tonight and what all that has been going on in my life personally is nothing. Life is going to be so much harder in the future. I need to enjoy it as much as possible now and not let things like tonight stop me from having fun while I'm still young.
I'm not saying that I will never have drama ever again or there won't be a day when I don't worry about my future or finding a job .. I'm just saying that I'm going to stop caring so much about the little stuff in my life and try to find the bright side to things. Tonight definitely wasn't the best of nights, but it ended with me having a HUGE self-realization ... which I needed.
Tonight was Red, White, and Boom in downtown Columbus and I was pretty excited for it. My friend Clare and I went down together and met up with 3 of our other friends. The night sounded promising.
I was wrong.
I texted my friend Josh to see if he was going too. He said he was and that he was going to be with his girlfriend, and 2 other people that hate Clare and I. It's all good though. Well we were texting back and forth about meeting up and things were going fine. I have not seen Josh in FOREVER and I was so excited to finally see him. He was supposed to call me or text me when he got to High Street. He never did. I tried calling him and it rang a couple of times and went to his voicemail. He obviously had his phone with him and just wasn't answering.
It's just all so dumb because after my last blog about Josh and whatnot he actually DID text me back. We started talking and he wanted to start hanging out again. So why did he totally blow me and Clare off tonight? I understand that probably the 2 people that don't like us didn't want to meet up, but at least a simple text from Josh saying he couldn't meet up because he didn't want there to be any tension and that we could hang out some other time. But no. He just acted like he was going to see us and then BAM! Nothing. I just don't understand it.
And well if that wasn't enough blowing off for the night it happened not once ... but twice more.
My friends that Clare and I had hung out with earlier did pretty much the same thing. They left while me and Clare were eating and said we would meet up later. So after we're done eating I text one of them asking where they are. They say they are by this band... so we go there and they aren't there. So I text again and ask them where they are. Now they are by the ice skating rink. I didn't know where that is so I sent a text asking where ... no response. I tried calling ... voicemail.
So naturally at this point Clare and I are pretty pissed off. What is going on with our friends? We understand that it's super crowded, but it's not that hard to stay in one place and wait. I don't get why the texting would be pretty back and forth and then just stop. It seriously makes no sense to me. If you know someone is trying to find you wouldn't you try a little harder to keep in contact? Apparently not?
The third time... we saw some of our friends as we were walking to find my other friends. They wanted us to meet up later so we could all watch fireworks together. I text my friend asking where she is because we are pretty much lost. She says she is on the corner of Neil and Long. I have no idea where the heck that is. All I knew was that we were on Vine and High ... so I text her that and I get no response. Blow off #3.
Clare and I came to the conclusion that we honestly just lost all of our "friends". I mean it's whatever at this point because once you start to realize how highschool this all is [and yes I realize it] you just stop giving a shit about it. Why should I feel bad because you're treating me like shit? All I know is friends don't treat each other like this and there is no way in hell I'm dealing with this anymore.
I think what really topped my night was my friend Tom. He was the second one to blow me off. I've known him since 7th grade and we've always been close friends. [7th and 8th grade year I liked him and told him that I liked him and he rejected me.. twice ..we make fun about it now though.] Earlier that day when we met up with them at a restaurant ... he was acting strange. It's really complicated to explain this without going into a million other details, but basically since Senior year I'm almost positive he has developed feelings for me, but he refuses to admit it. Like I said ... complicated. But tonight he did something I wasn't really expecting...
We were all sitting at the table and Clare got up to go to the bathroom. So it was me, Tom ,and 2 of our other friends. Tom is a person who jokes around about everything [but he knows when to be serious]. He's a good guy. Like I said earlier he always makes fun of how I used to like him. Well today, he makes the comment, "Amy ... if you were my girlfriend I would play with your hair." And then he played with my hair. I just laughed and rolled my eyes. Then he says, "Can you ever even imagine us... you know?" And I was like, "What ... dating?" And he said, "No ... having sex. It'd be so weird because I am like a brother to you." I was like, "Uh yeah I know ..." and then just laughed because seriously what else was I supposed to do? He brings up that shit all the time. Then, out of nowhere he grabs my hand and just holds it. Now usually he would be joking around in front of his friends and whatnot ... he didn't this time though. He just grabbed my hand, held it for a little bit, and then let go. Weirdest thing ever.
I know this all sounds like so high school and to be honest it kind of was. My whole night was like a day in the life of a high school sophomore or something. It was pathetic. I feel like I should have written about this like 3 years ago and it would make more sense. But here I am ... 19 and still having high school drama.
When I saw Slacker and his girlfriend Stacy the other night they made me realize that my life is not as bad as I make it out to be. And they are 100% right. I bitch and complain about the stupidest shit when in reality my life is not as bad as it could be. And I definitely don't have it as awful as other people in the world. I guess I just like to write my feelings out and I make it seem like it's the biggest deal in the world, but I've come to see that things like what happened tonight and what all that has been going on in my life personally is nothing. Life is going to be so much harder in the future. I need to enjoy it as much as possible now and not let things like tonight stop me from having fun while I'm still young.
I'm not saying that I will never have drama ever again or there won't be a day when I don't worry about my future or finding a job .. I'm just saying that I'm going to stop caring so much about the little stuff in my life and try to find the bright side to things. Tonight definitely wasn't the best of nights, but it ended with me having a HUGE self-realization ... which I needed.
- So...yeah.
Wednesday, August 3rd 2011
6:06PM
Been at...