Ed Hill was one of those guys that everybody liked. He was cordial, soft spoken, and very funny. He was the kind of guy you didn't mind just walking up to your table and sitting down for a beer and a chat. Never boring, that was also Ed.
When I met Ed about ten years ago he was already retired and just dropped into my favorite hangout at the time. Now he like the rest of us wasn't perfect by any means. He was a character who sometimes got himself in trouble by being cordial, soft spoken, and very funny. One day he came in just dying to tell this joke he heard from one of his cronies from the old days. A blonde joke. More specifically a blonde midget joke. Unfortunately for Ed, a certain Miss Stevens who was a natural blonde and all of four feet seven inches tall was also sitting at the bar. He didn't see her. She hates blonde jokes. She really hated as we found out midget blonde jokes. I was laughing so hard I missed which street Ed was running down but caught a glimpse of Miss Stevens turning down a side street in a high speed foot pursuit. That's when we started calling him "Fast Eddie".
Eddie was also a practical joker but things seldom worked out the way he planned. One of his favorite things on the Fourth of July was to throw firecrackers from his car onto my front yard. With me usually sitting in the kitchen or living room, both with ample view of the street and yard, Eddie would attempt to light a string of firecrackers, throw them, and speed away in his car. It never worked. Once the wind caught the firecracker and carried them back onto Eddie just as they went off, another time the wind caught them and carried the weapons of grass destruction into my next door neighbors lawn scaring his dog and pissing the neighbor off enough that I had to go out and rescue a stuttering Eddie. The best was when he decided this was the year to get it right and he stayed in the car to light the crackers and toss them on to my lawn through the passenger side window. A good plan but already having several cocktails Eddie forgot to lower the window first. Eddie lit them, tossed them, and then with wide eyes and no time left for a Plan B tried to dodge them as they all exploded inside the car and all in the front seat. When the smoke cleared enough he drove off with mine and several other's laughter in his ears. Unless the crackers left him temporarily deaf.
A few weeks ago Eddie's wife called him to the dinner table. Eddie was in his favorite chair taking a little nap after doing some light yardwork. But Eddie never got up. With a smile still on his face Eddie was quietly called up to Glory.
I will miss Eddie and his antics as will a lot of people around here. His way with people was a gift and I never heard a bad remark about anyone cross his lips. Yes, cordial, soft spoken and funny are going to be in short supply around here.
And Miss Stevens? She and Eddie healed up a long time ago. Cordial...and soft spoken....and funny.
When I met Ed about ten years ago he was already retired and just dropped into my favorite hangout at the time. Now he like the rest of us wasn't perfect by any means. He was a character who sometimes got himself in trouble by being cordial, soft spoken, and very funny. One day he came in just dying to tell this joke he heard from one of his cronies from the old days. A blonde joke. More specifically a blonde midget joke. Unfortunately for Ed, a certain Miss Stevens who was a natural blonde and all of four feet seven inches tall was also sitting at the bar. He didn't see her. She hates blonde jokes. She really hated as we found out midget blonde jokes. I was laughing so hard I missed which street Ed was running down but caught a glimpse of Miss Stevens turning down a side street in a high speed foot pursuit. That's when we started calling him "Fast Eddie".
Eddie was also a practical joker but things seldom worked out the way he planned. One of his favorite things on the Fourth of July was to throw firecrackers from his car onto my front yard. With me usually sitting in the kitchen or living room, both with ample view of the street and yard, Eddie would attempt to light a string of firecrackers, throw them, and speed away in his car. It never worked. Once the wind caught the firecracker and carried them back onto Eddie just as they went off, another time the wind caught them and carried the weapons of grass destruction into my next door neighbors lawn scaring his dog and pissing the neighbor off enough that I had to go out and rescue a stuttering Eddie. The best was when he decided this was the year to get it right and he stayed in the car to light the crackers and toss them on to my lawn through the passenger side window. A good plan but already having several cocktails Eddie forgot to lower the window first. Eddie lit them, tossed them, and then with wide eyes and no time left for a Plan B tried to dodge them as they all exploded inside the car and all in the front seat. When the smoke cleared enough he drove off with mine and several other's laughter in his ears. Unless the crackers left him temporarily deaf.
A few weeks ago Eddie's wife called him to the dinner table. Eddie was in his favorite chair taking a little nap after doing some light yardwork. But Eddie never got up. With a smile still on his face Eddie was quietly called up to Glory.
I will miss Eddie and his antics as will a lot of people around here. His way with people was a gift and I never heard a bad remark about anyone cross his lips. Yes, cordial, soft spoken and funny are going to be in short supply around here.
And Miss Stevens? She and Eddie healed up a long time ago. Cordial...and soft spoken....and funny.
