When my father called this afternoon, after giving me the whole "You wasted two decades of your life" speech, which I basically blew off, because as he says, I cant undo it, he had a suggestion that I just cannot do.
My father suggested that I take a taxi round trip to my mom';s grave, stand over her grave, and tell her what happened with passing my exam.
No.. for many reasons.
While I'm better, going to her grave, might make me lose it altogether, and I cant do that now, especially with as hard as I worked, and needing to hold it together, with the upcoming uncertainity of what is going to happen with Aflac, or anything else.
Also..
Going there alone.. with no one else there, especially with it being the first time I would have been there since she died.. would probably make me hysterical with grief, and might send me into another depression.
When I passed today.. Three thoughts crossed my mind immediately.
Mitch's accomplishment, and how hard I worked.
My mom, and how proud she would be if she were here to see it.
Call my father, and tell him.
My feeling: She's watching, and she knows. I will go to the cemetery, and stand over her grave, tell her, and cry. I just cant right now. I know she understands.
I just hope and pray that this accomplishment that I worked so hard for.. is the beginning of a good 2014 for me, and a turning the corner.
I again thank all those who supported me during this process.
My father suggested that I take a taxi round trip to my mom';s grave, stand over her grave, and tell her what happened with passing my exam.
No.. for many reasons.
While I'm better, going to her grave, might make me lose it altogether, and I cant do that now, especially with as hard as I worked, and needing to hold it together, with the upcoming uncertainity of what is going to happen with Aflac, or anything else.
Also..
Going there alone.. with no one else there, especially with it being the first time I would have been there since she died.. would probably make me hysterical with grief, and might send me into another depression.
When I passed today.. Three thoughts crossed my mind immediately.
Mitch's accomplishment, and how hard I worked.
My mom, and how proud she would be if she were here to see it.
Call my father, and tell him.
My feeling: She's watching, and she knows. I will go to the cemetery, and stand over her grave, tell her, and cry. I just cant right now. I know she understands.
I just hope and pray that this accomplishment that I worked so hard for.. is the beginning of a good 2014 for me, and a turning the corner.
I again thank all those who supported me during this process.
