Again best posted in the blog.
Last night was my worst night, probably since I moved to NY.
Bottom line, all of my relatives were laying guilt trips on me, getting down to, and making me think.. of the worst thing of them all, what mom would want me to do, and.. the worst thing that mom ever did.
This was a longgg time ago, and my mom repaid me many times over, in so many ways.. but..
' The only bad thing my mom ever did to me in my life, where I really felt she betrayed me, was in the mid 1990s, she went on a spending spree with my Amex card to the tune of thousands of dollars, and didnt tell me. I went to charge my college cap and gown for graduation, and had my Amex card taken away. I came home, and went ballistic at her.
The debt was settled, years ago, but, before it was.. it caused one of the famous confrontations between her, me, and my dad, that I'm trying to put in the past.
Now, I'm left with the residual of that spending spree. My mom.'s.. thousands of pieces of costume jewelry.
My aunts want me to sell the costume jewelry, and split the money three ways.
Somehow, when my dad heard this, it gave him a perfect opportunity to diss my mom. He said. "Any money you get from that should be yours. "She" (My mom) put your neck in a noose for it, and now its time for you to be repaid. '
I never thought about it that way. I forgave her, years ago, because she did so much good for me for my whole life.
The worst thing is, that I dont know what my mom would want me to do. She was so generous to all her family, including my grandparents, and my aunts. I cant call my dead mother, but if I could, this is one I'd like to ask her.
Worse, when I was going through this, I was talking so fast, that something rushed out of my mouth, that I didnt want to. Yesterday I found a piece of jewelry that was real, and sold it, for less than $200. When this rushed out of my mouth unintended when I talked to my dad last night, he was drunk, and said something like "Mitch, you have to stop feeling guilty and hiding things, its your money:"
I was so overwhelmed when I got into bed last night, I cried until nearly the time I fell assleep.. I'm wearing all black sleep clothes now, and plan to do so until I have to show up at the wonderful cousin who dissed my mom this Sunday.
I know I have my issues, but I'm very fixated on wanting to do the right thing.
This might get much worse. I cant post the details of that yet, but I will when the time is right.,
Mom, I need your help, and you're not here to help me. Your family is driving me crazy.
Mitch
Last night was my worst night, probably since I moved to NY.
Bottom line, all of my relatives were laying guilt trips on me, getting down to, and making me think.. of the worst thing of them all, what mom would want me to do, and.. the worst thing that mom ever did.
This was a longgg time ago, and my mom repaid me many times over, in so many ways.. but..
' The only bad thing my mom ever did to me in my life, where I really felt she betrayed me, was in the mid 1990s, she went on a spending spree with my Amex card to the tune of thousands of dollars, and didnt tell me. I went to charge my college cap and gown for graduation, and had my Amex card taken away. I came home, and went ballistic at her.
The debt was settled, years ago, but, before it was.. it caused one of the famous confrontations between her, me, and my dad, that I'm trying to put in the past.
Now, I'm left with the residual of that spending spree. My mom.'s.. thousands of pieces of costume jewelry.
My aunts want me to sell the costume jewelry, and split the money three ways.
Somehow, when my dad heard this, it gave him a perfect opportunity to diss my mom. He said. "Any money you get from that should be yours. "She" (My mom) put your neck in a noose for it, and now its time for you to be repaid. '
I never thought about it that way. I forgave her, years ago, because she did so much good for me for my whole life.
The worst thing is, that I dont know what my mom would want me to do. She was so generous to all her family, including my grandparents, and my aunts. I cant call my dead mother, but if I could, this is one I'd like to ask her.
Worse, when I was going through this, I was talking so fast, that something rushed out of my mouth, that I didnt want to. Yesterday I found a piece of jewelry that was real, and sold it, for less than $200. When this rushed out of my mouth unintended when I talked to my dad last night, he was drunk, and said something like "Mitch, you have to stop feeling guilty and hiding things, its your money:"
I was so overwhelmed when I got into bed last night, I cried until nearly the time I fell assleep.. I'm wearing all black sleep clothes now, and plan to do so until I have to show up at the wonderful cousin who dissed my mom this Sunday.
I know I have my issues, but I'm very fixated on wanting to do the right thing.
This might get much worse. I cant post the details of that yet, but I will when the time is right.,
Mom, I need your help, and you're not here to help me. Your family is driving me crazy.
Mitch
