Several things for the blog.
First, I was a complete idiot for posting the "Even Keel" thread. Barney has been very attentive. He called me from his business trip last night, and told me he plans to see me this Friday. Reality is, he wont have much time in the near future. I need to accept that, and I do. As long as he keeps in touch.. it will be fine.
On to.. other things..
Maria: We had a two hr conversation today. I've posted how its moving along at a snail's pace, because we both have "issues", but.. I gave her my number, and told her to call me 24-7, and she accepted it. I have to laugh when we discuss our situation. She's a shopaholic, and she knows I like to go to the casino/horse track. Shes okay with that. She even mentioned that she would go to my other favorite activity, the Mets and Braves, and she would be okay with it if I watch Jim Gardner at night. She said she goes to bed at 10, so that may not be an issue. I walk around all night, lol, so either I have to give up Jim Gardner, or just watch him after she's out.
As for "living with mom", and "Daddy helping me", she knows about all of that, and her reply: BFD. She said that it doesnt change how she feels about me as a person., She lives in her parents house that she inherited.
We talked about a "date as friends". I'd pay, of course. The destination, Acqueduct, lol. She said she wants to go. If she wanted to go someplace else, we would do that.
She keeps saying to me (About herself) "I'm not smart (Her words,) and if you became president of the company you want to do, why would you be with me? I cant even give you kids, I'm almost 50". The answer.. because you';re a great person. " If we want "kids", we can adopt.
I'm being the "assertive man" without pushing too hard that I'd scare her away. I really, really like this girl. She's a great person, and what's so amazing is that I';ve gotten to know her as a person, before being with her "physically",. I think thats an advantage.
We have not yet discussed.. Feet.. tickling.. or sexual perferences. However, she's already stated that she would be willing to bend over backward for a man she loved.. soo. the way I figure it is.. once I explained it to her, she would probably be like. "WTF" at first, and then be okay with it. I have no idea about her ticklishness or lack thereof. Even if she isnt, and wanted to be a ler to me, I'd be okay with that, as long as she was understanding about "feet". If she was very ticklish, and wanted me to go easy, I would. I figure living alone all these years, she must have stood on a ladder at some point, but if she hates heights, bag it".
I worry a little bit about one thing: My dad's family, is highly educated, and can also have a superiority complex. I'd be hopeful that they wouldnt be "insulting" to Maria, if she didnt come off as "knowledgable as them" However, Maria and I talked about "Book Smarts, and Street Smarts". I have to laugh, because this is a discussion we used to have amongst ourselves in college. My father's family has the former, Maria has the latter.
With the one year anniversary of my mom's passing coming next week,. I wonder two things. A. If symbolicly, this is a new chapter in my life. B. What mom would think of her. She has no family to ascertain me, because, tragically, her parents and brother are all passed away.
Hopefully this is a more positive entry. I'm feeling, hopeful about this.
First, I was a complete idiot for posting the "Even Keel" thread. Barney has been very attentive. He called me from his business trip last night, and told me he plans to see me this Friday. Reality is, he wont have much time in the near future. I need to accept that, and I do. As long as he keeps in touch.. it will be fine.
On to.. other things..
Maria: We had a two hr conversation today. I've posted how its moving along at a snail's pace, because we both have "issues", but.. I gave her my number, and told her to call me 24-7, and she accepted it. I have to laugh when we discuss our situation. She's a shopaholic, and she knows I like to go to the casino/horse track. Shes okay with that. She even mentioned that she would go to my other favorite activity, the Mets and Braves, and she would be okay with it if I watch Jim Gardner at night. She said she goes to bed at 10, so that may not be an issue. I walk around all night, lol, so either I have to give up Jim Gardner, or just watch him after she's out.
As for "living with mom", and "Daddy helping me", she knows about all of that, and her reply: BFD. She said that it doesnt change how she feels about me as a person., She lives in her parents house that she inherited.
We talked about a "date as friends". I'd pay, of course. The destination, Acqueduct, lol. She said she wants to go. If she wanted to go someplace else, we would do that.
She keeps saying to me (About herself) "I'm not smart (Her words,) and if you became president of the company you want to do, why would you be with me? I cant even give you kids, I'm almost 50". The answer.. because you';re a great person. " If we want "kids", we can adopt.
I'm being the "assertive man" without pushing too hard that I'd scare her away. I really, really like this girl. She's a great person, and what's so amazing is that I';ve gotten to know her as a person, before being with her "physically",. I think thats an advantage.
We have not yet discussed.. Feet.. tickling.. or sexual perferences. However, she's already stated that she would be willing to bend over backward for a man she loved.. soo. the way I figure it is.. once I explained it to her, she would probably be like. "WTF" at first, and then be okay with it. I have no idea about her ticklishness or lack thereof. Even if she isnt, and wanted to be a ler to me, I'd be okay with that, as long as she was understanding about "feet". If she was very ticklish, and wanted me to go easy, I would. I figure living alone all these years, she must have stood on a ladder at some point, but if she hates heights, bag it".
I worry a little bit about one thing: My dad's family, is highly educated, and can also have a superiority complex. I'd be hopeful that they wouldnt be "insulting" to Maria, if she didnt come off as "knowledgable as them" However, Maria and I talked about "Book Smarts, and Street Smarts". I have to laugh, because this is a discussion we used to have amongst ourselves in college. My father's family has the former, Maria has the latter.
With the one year anniversary of my mom's passing coming next week,. I wonder two things. A. If symbolicly, this is a new chapter in my life. B. What mom would think of her. She has no family to ascertain me, because, tragically, her parents and brother are all passed away.
Hopefully this is a more positive entry. I'm feeling, hopeful about this.
