My recent dealings with my relatives, especially my father, and my aunt the artist, make me realize how much I truly dislike them, and, how, my mom, and years earlier, my maternal grandparents, were the only ones who truly gave a damn about me.
I've told my father countless times this year how I don't want to hear him complain about what he "could" have done to my mom, to put her in the street... or to be PR man to his cousins who don't give a damn about me. Yet, every time we go out to dinner.. he does exactly that.... and his benign assessment that his brother was "wrong" in how he treated me in December.
Then there is the issue of how my father spends absolutely no time with me. He comes for an hour, and leaves. He's currently on a nearly two week European trip with Cheryl, his fourth week long trip with her since.. December., I certainly don't have a right to say anything about how often he travels with his wife..but.. it might have been nice if, considering how things have gone for me since Feb 2012, if, perhaps.. he suggested that he and I.. go away for the weekend?
Then there is my aunt the artist.. If I so much as express displeasure about how my father treats me.. she keeps telling me how I "Have to forget about it", because it isn't her life. I should forget about his perpetual abuse of me, his ripping my mom, and justifying other people who treat me like shit. What I plan to "forget about" is her. I'm going to take a hiatus from her. She didn't like that I sent him an email expressing my feelings. My relationship with him is only run with his feelings mattering, so he can keep telling me how he could have put my mom in the street, and how much his cousins care. When I told him that his cousins and brother';s behavior toward me has no affect on him, and this isn't normal, his reaction was "That's not true" in a snippy tone.
I sent my father an email before he left for Europe, telling him that his ongoing rage really isn't understandable. He conducted the most hideous divorce, leaving my mom with nothing. He promised me grad school, and never delivered. He was left with money, a wife, all the friends, all the family, and still has the opportunity to treat Mitch like shit.
He's away until next week. My aunt told me that I should see a bankruptcy lawyer myself, but my father claims he has someone working on it for me. I'm going to give him a couple of days after he gets home, and if not, go myself.
I never get anything I want. The sources about my business ignored me. Maria doesn't want me. I saw her yesterday at the restaurant and she was very cold to me. Barney is behaving impossibly.
If I had the ability, and could catch a few breaks, the bottom line is that I would love to do my business, make enough money to pay my father back every penny that he laid out for me, be estranged from my entire family, and start a new life.
My father is without phone contact until next Thursday. Good. I don't have to deal with his twice a day, one minute phone calls. As for my aunt, I'm just going to keep my phone shut off.
If my mom saw how these people are behaving,, she would be appalled. She was a much better, kinder person than any of them, and deserved far better than my father for a husband, and my aunt for a sister. My mom didn't deserve the fate she got. Such is why I really question if there is a "God". I know that's a debate I will get ripped for. I will believe there is a God when I'm successful at my hard work for the business I want to do, and when I can be either estranged from, or far removed, from all my relatives who truly don't give a damn about anything except themselves.
I've told my father countless times this year how I don't want to hear him complain about what he "could" have done to my mom, to put her in the street... or to be PR man to his cousins who don't give a damn about me. Yet, every time we go out to dinner.. he does exactly that.... and his benign assessment that his brother was "wrong" in how he treated me in December.
Then there is the issue of how my father spends absolutely no time with me. He comes for an hour, and leaves. He's currently on a nearly two week European trip with Cheryl, his fourth week long trip with her since.. December., I certainly don't have a right to say anything about how often he travels with his wife..but.. it might have been nice if, considering how things have gone for me since Feb 2012, if, perhaps.. he suggested that he and I.. go away for the weekend?
Then there is my aunt the artist.. If I so much as express displeasure about how my father treats me.. she keeps telling me how I "Have to forget about it", because it isn't her life. I should forget about his perpetual abuse of me, his ripping my mom, and justifying other people who treat me like shit. What I plan to "forget about" is her. I'm going to take a hiatus from her. She didn't like that I sent him an email expressing my feelings. My relationship with him is only run with his feelings mattering, so he can keep telling me how he could have put my mom in the street, and how much his cousins care. When I told him that his cousins and brother';s behavior toward me has no affect on him, and this isn't normal, his reaction was "That's not true" in a snippy tone.
I sent my father an email before he left for Europe, telling him that his ongoing rage really isn't understandable. He conducted the most hideous divorce, leaving my mom with nothing. He promised me grad school, and never delivered. He was left with money, a wife, all the friends, all the family, and still has the opportunity to treat Mitch like shit.
He's away until next week. My aunt told me that I should see a bankruptcy lawyer myself, but my father claims he has someone working on it for me. I'm going to give him a couple of days after he gets home, and if not, go myself.
I never get anything I want. The sources about my business ignored me. Maria doesn't want me. I saw her yesterday at the restaurant and she was very cold to me. Barney is behaving impossibly.
If I had the ability, and could catch a few breaks, the bottom line is that I would love to do my business, make enough money to pay my father back every penny that he laid out for me, be estranged from my entire family, and start a new life.
My father is without phone contact until next Thursday. Good. I don't have to deal with his twice a day, one minute phone calls. As for my aunt, I'm just going to keep my phone shut off.
If my mom saw how these people are behaving,, she would be appalled. She was a much better, kinder person than any of them, and deserved far better than my father for a husband, and my aunt for a sister. My mom didn't deserve the fate she got. Such is why I really question if there is a "God". I know that's a debate I will get ripped for. I will believe there is a God when I'm successful at my hard work for the business I want to do, and when I can be either estranged from, or far removed, from all my relatives who truly don't give a damn about anything except themselves.
