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Ask a Rhino!

S

Skipadeedoodah

Verified
Joined
Dec 24, 2002
Messages
16,615
Points
36
In an effort to teach all who are interested a little more about our good friend the Rhino, my lovely wife, BlackestLily, and I have taken it upon ourselves to create a thread in which the inquisitive masses can feel free to ask questions about him.

Because he's such a busy rhinoceros, we will be answering any and all questions on his behalf. In the incredibly likely event that he pops in here and contradicts our answers, let it be known now that we are the creators and controllers of this thread, and our word is law.

Aaand go!
 
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He does indeed. Part of his Rhino persona is that he has to have one of those little birds riding around on his back all the time. He feeds him corn kernels and calls him Manny. I have a feeling he confides in him a bit as well, but that would be kept between the two of them.
 
milagros317 said:
What does the Rhino eat? :D
Click to expand...
Not to be seduced by variety, the Rhino eats a healthy diet of Lean Cuisines, yogurt and Diet Pepsi.

It has been rumored that he may also snack on the occasional douchebag/asshole/creeper, but that is not for dietary sustenance. That is more where you see the Rhino's tendency to hunt simply for sport.
 
Does the Rhino charge and destroy poets because if he does I need to run for my very life???????????
 
Dear Mr. Rhino,

I am very sad to see that you are once again being picked on by those mean girls. Ergo my question: How do you think Skippy and B. Lily intend to survive their next encounter with you, given the heinous nature of this latest transgression? :shock:


Sincerely,

A Concerned Citizen
 
I have a question, Exactly how massively huge is the pwnage of these two purple traders going to be?
 
texastickler said:
Does the Rhino charge and destroy poets because if he does I need to run for my very life???????????
Click to expand...

Not to worry - Rhinos are docile unless provoked.


>.>

<.<

:xpeepsofa

asutickler said:
Dear Mr. Rhino,

I am very sad to see that you are once again being picked on by those mean girls. Ergo my question: How do you think Skippy and B. Lily intend to survive their next encounter with you, given the heinous nature of this latest transgression? :shock:


Sincerely,

A Concerned Citizen
Click to expand...

Dear Citizen

In the interest of accuracy, I find it necessary to point out that the Rhino is, without a doubt, the one most guilty of instigating and provoking my wife and me. He is constantly threatening me with various deaths that always are at the hands of many filthy, disgusting bugs. He also give me death stares from across crowded rooms. He is, by no means, an innocent victim.

As for my wife and I surviving our next encounter, if you knew the Rhino you would know that while he he may be aggressive and threatening on the forum, face to face he is a different beast. He cuddles, he jokes, and he even busts out a freestyle rap from time to time :shock: In short, my wife and I are confidant that our next encounter with the Rhino will be without death or dismemberment.

Sincerely
-Management

vladtickleman22 said:
I have a question, Exactly how massively huge is the pwnage of these two purple traders going to be?
Click to expand...

I invite you to join us at the next gathering and see for yourself :D
 
Skipadeedoodah said:
Dear Citizen

In the interest of accuracy, I find it necessary to point out that the Rhino is, without a doubt, the one most guilty of instigating and provoking my wife and me. He is constantly threatening me with various deaths that always are at the hands of many filthy, disgusting bugs. He also give me death stares from across crowded rooms. He is, by no means, an innocent victim.

As for my wife and I surviving our next encounter, if you knew the Rhino you would know that while he he may be aggressive and threatening on the forum, face to face he is a different beast. He cuddles, he jokes, and he even busts out a freestyle rap from time to time :shock: In short, my wife and I are confidant that our next encounter with the Rhino will be without death or dismemberment.

Sincerely
-Management
Click to expand...

So true! The worst we'll come out with is red spots on our foreheads.
 
TropicThunder said:
Who does the Rhino think is more crazy out of the two of you?? :D
Click to expand...

Definitely my better half. You see, she has experienced his rage and always comes back for more. It's sort of like the fighting movies you see, where a guy gets punched in the face and he starts laughing manically while saying, "Do it again! AGAIN!!" Pretty soon his opponent is thinking that something might be up, and this person may be way more strong/insane than he originally thought. It's too late to back out, though, because the townspeople are now watching from the porch of their saloons and he doesn't want to look weak. This is how cities have fallen, and likely how the Rhino shall fall.
 
TropicThunder said:
If I run like super fast, could the Rhino catch me?
Click to expand...

Yes, rhinos can reach speeds of up to 40 miles an hour. So if you ever find yourself in a situation needing escape, throw oreos into nearby brush. Rhinos can't resist them.
 
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