Is being good bad?

[Bashiku]

Well in my experience this 20 years, good is not good at all... not for you at least. I've always been a goody good two shoes, and I rarely didn't help someone or be useful and I didn't want anything in return, except their gratitude and to remember that I am their friend.

That is a good thing no? But lately I noticed that the more good you are, the more bad are others to you, they misuse your trust, treat you as an object, even forget about your existence, until you become useful once more.

So my question is... what gives? Is being good so bad for you this days? Should I release my inner evil and snap at everything, put them on stakes and eat blood filled bread like the Vlad the Impaler just to fit into society?

Enlighten me please.

 

[melanie2]

no hon...do not change who you are...hmm i know what you mean as i've been a very good girl most of my life until recently...continue to do what you do..but don't let anyone take advantage of your goodness and kindness..don't let them kick you in the teeth..the world today needs all the good people it can get...too much evil out there i believe...

and when i say i've been good until recently..i mean that two years ago i met with some members of the tmf..separately...and i did this behind my husband's back...the first really bad thing i've ever done..i would do it all again..though..as when i met with the different members, i finally got tickled for the first time in my life actually...but it did hurt my husband..as i told him about the meetings..i told him last summer..so in a way i cheated on him for the first time in my life also..although these weren't sexual meetings it was still meeting with strange men behind his back...and i've promised him to not do it again ever..

 

[Bashiku]

Well you have needs also... he should really take a few feathers every now and then. But being is good is full time hard labor, not that being evil is any easier, but it is sometimes necessary.
Take the red pill and you get high... take the blue pill and you get stoned... you are done for every way

 

[tk0]

I know where you're coming from because I'm exactly the same. To answer your question, no, being good is not bad. Unfortunately, there are just a lot of selfish people in the world.

 

[melanie2]

you are so right..being good takes effort..i've always lived for others..now don't be such a good person that you miss out on fun things..but you can do that without becoming an evil person...being evil is easy..being good is not...

i mean let's see....everyone could just say fuck it...i'm going to live for me...i'm going to do everything i please and to hell with everyone else..that's easy..selfish as hell but easy...being good can be dull, boring..but at the end of the day...which of the two is going to feel good about themselves..the one who says fuck it, i will hurt anyone i please, i will say awful things, i'll spread rumors..i'll drink and smoke all night long..i'll screw whom i want..or the person who takes the effort to be a good person..meaning they had those same choices but wouldn't do it..because deep down it's not right..ack am i making sense? i don't know..i've always been good...sometimes i regret it..but at the end of my life i doubt i'll regret it then...unless i do something really bad lol...hmm just be what you are now...i like it..

 

[Mr.Teehehe]

Being good is def not bad at all. I would much rather be a good person and be kind to others and look out for others and treat people how they want to be treated then just be out for myself and be selfish and only live for me and nobody else just me me me. That's the easy route to take and go with. Sure being good especially now a days in today's world it's seen as boring and dull and not the in thing the world wants you to walk over everybody and anybody and be mean and hurt peoples feelings and not care just not care. But in the long run for me personally i would rather be good and be nice and kind and sweet (but not some push over mind you heaven's no)

But not become some selfish it's all about me and not anybody else type of attitude. Both my older brother's are in a way selfish and like living the fancy life and concerned more about how they look etc and thier self. Even though one of my older brother's is Married and has a wife and has a little baby man named ''Ethan''. So i def learn and listen to pay attention to my brothers own mistakes and own fault's and def not seek out to make the same choices as they did and as they have.

So for the selfish and mean and heart-less cruel people they are sadly still in the world. Their are good people good true honest people that do care and that do the right things.

The only time i'm ''bad'' in a sense of the term. Is in a naughty and horny and frisky way with my girlfriend.

 

[GRM13]

It's not bad being good, it's just a heck of a lot harder. as for what you say, most of it is because people have people tend to lean to what makes life easier for them. Sometimes that means abusing others for their gain. I know how you feel it sucks being used. But don't give up. because if one it's rare to find good helpful folks like us and if we go extinct, then the world really will go down the drain.

We need people to be good so it spreads to others, (like a disease... a good disease )

 

[FeatherDaemon1]

I like being a good person. Being good doesn't mean being weak and a push over. I'm perfectly willing to tell someone where to shove it if I feel that they're using me. That has rarely happened though. I feel that my basic good judgment has put me in a position where I rarely have to deal with those people. Maybe I've been lucky, but I do believe in either karma or God tilting the pinball machine for you whatever you want to call it. Plus, I have a deep-rooted need to be helpful to my fellow man. We are all in this together after all. Being good to others spreads seeds that you often do not have any awareness about.

 

[P[a]pi]

You gotta be good to the right people.

 

[Dr. Bill Kobb]

You gotta be good to the right people.

Amen. There's no sense in casting pearls before swine and all that...

 

[blackmagicjack1]

Here's a thought - just try to be you without calling it good or bad. The first person anyone needs to take care of is themselves. I think our job is to be the best "us" that we can be. When we do that we not only support ourselves, but others too.

Being "good" in the expectation of gratitude or recognition isn't bad - it's poor self-esteem. If you did something you are proud of, what do you care if someone doesn't recognize it - that's your job.

My point is to live in the way that best suits you and don't worry about the judgment of others. Seriously, good and bad are subjective terms completely defined by the perceptions of the user. One man's heaven is another man's hell.

And Papi has a point, who you spend your time on is important. Don't go wasting your time on people who do not want to, or cannot, appreciate it.

 

[sadi]

Definitely NOT!! Though it may be fun when on a more friendly context with the person (to a certain extent), it's is never acceptable to be bad to anyone - especially if that regresses to harm (unnecessarily). You need to stand up for what you believe in, and though the majority of people nowadays would abuse a 'goodie two-shoes' person, that - unfortunately - is just life now.
Stick up for what you believe in and feel is right, just, true, etc. but that doesn't mean you're to be unnecessarily mean to anyone, though it can being some level of enjoyment to yourself depending on the scenario.

Basically, try to bend over backwards to be as nice to people as possible, while still keeping your backbone and preventing people from exploiting you for their own purposes.

 

[3xPIN]

Well, in my 26 years on this planet i have done and experienced the same things. But you don't do good things so you can be treated like your good. It makes people think you are pretentious or self-rightious. They look down on you because they think you are weak and blah blah. If you wanna snap and go crazy and become Vlad the Impaler II, go for it. But being a bad person doesn't mean you will "fit into society," it means you will be in the social norm. And who wants that?

Also, as for your "friends" who have been "abusing" you and Who "misuse your trust" and so on and so forth, I have one thing to say: Those people aren't your friends! You should forget about their existence for a while. And when they come to take advantage of you, just say, calmly, coolly and collectively (CCC) this, "You suck. You are not my friend. You are an asshole. you take advantage of me and I'm sick of it. Fuck you. I am changing my number." Never speak with them again unless they make an effort to treat you like a human and not a thing. This is not mean or evil; it is, in fact, love! Tough love!

And incedently, evil is easier. Proof: Book of Vile Darkness=One Author (DnD 3.5 ed supplement how to be extra evil) Book of Exalted Deeds=Three Authors! (same thing except how to extra good) At least its harder to write. :laughing:

There, you have been enlightened.

 

[TyrantRaveAB]

i vote for the stakes... just sayin.

 

[Bashiku]

Kiwich it was Vlad Tepes the Third... He was the impaler. Vlad Second was known as Dragon. But you are all right. Thanks for answering... it is highly appreciated

 

[durandalai1]

nope

No point in being nice to everyone. You can be positive but you don't have to go out of your way to people who never return the favor.

I don't know your context, or the situation you must have been in to trigger your post, but heres the thing treat your friends well, treat your family well, treat your other half well, screw anyone else.


Face it, there are going to be people you can't please and people that are going to use you.

It happens.

I used to be a good person, now I'm only good to some people and terrible to others. My friends love me, my girlfriend loves me, my family loves me.

The guy that cuts me off on the freeway and i give the finger to doesn't get my love because he sucks.

You just have to figure out who you need to be nice to, and everyone else just deal with. Don't waste your love on people who will treat you like trash

 

[Cbarton]

Doing good and the right thing is it's own reward.
I got a major customer service award recently for just helping an elderly patient get in his wheelchair as I was going in to work on a rainy February morning?

Why did I do it? He needed help, his wife/daughter (not sure which) was having problems getting him in so I helped. My common practice of courtesy. Someone was it, filled an "atta-boy" type report and I was got rewarded again for it. My first reward was just doing it.

Common courtesy and etiquette is not weakness, but the right thing. If others take advantage or look down on it, fine. THEY are the losers in life.

Seek the Greater Reward!

 

[3xPIN]

Kiwich it was Vlad Tepes the Third... He was the impaler. Vlad Second was known as Dragon. But you are all right. Thanks for answering... it is highly appreciated

No need to thank me. (Still: You are welcome.)

And i take no shame for my lack of lineage accuracy with my Vlad the Impaler II! You said "like Vlad the Impaler." I figured that would make you "Vlad the Impaler II" But Kudos on your knowledge of Dracula lineage.

 

[Bashiku]

No need to thank me. (Still: You are welcome.)

And i take no shame for my lack of lineage accuracy with my Vlad the Impaler II! You said "like Vlad the Impaler." I figured that would make you "Vlad the Impaler II" But Kudos on your knowledge of Dracula lineage.

Hehe I should know about him more than about my own father... he is sort of a idol to me... those were lovely times... stakes, wars, political betrayals, ottoman empires... um what was the main question of this thread?

 

[Stugots]

It's good to be bad and good!! Throw your goody good two shoes away and wear another pair.

 

[melanie2]

It's good to be bad and good!! Throw your goody good two shoes away and wear another pair.

ah i believe i'll take that advice myself...thank you..

 

[FeatherDaemon1]

OK... so a question to the "bad" people. There is violent storm raging outside and you see an old woman who is struggling with bags of groceries and her umbrella. She is dropping things and is having a terrible time of it. Nobody is saying that you have to do anything. The old woman should have been paying attention to the weather news. Nobody else is around to act, its only you. Do you just ignore her or do you give her some help?

Like I said before, being good is not about being a pansy, pushover Nancy boy. That is being weak, not good. Being good is not about sexual or social abstention either. Its not about seeking rewards or recognition for justification. People can have a very rough exterior and still have basic guiding principles within them. So people can be "bad" all they want, but when it comes down to brass tax that is when the truth shows.

 

[melanie2]

ah...of course i would help her..

which reminds me of my father...his chemo made him weak, yet he continued to go to work...one day he told me that on his way to the dentist's office, walking on the sidewalk to the building, he was so weak he dropped to his knees..and stayed that way for a bit..and people walked right by him and no one..i mean NOT A SOUL stopped to help him or even ask what was wrong..my heart broke for him that day...

 

[chicag0]

I found being a goody goody is not always "good".

Sometimes, you can become a push-over, which just leaves you hurt. Also, I've found in abstaining from a lot of what would be considered "bad behaviors" I don't get to experience all that I'd like to. Sometimes you just gotta say "fuck it" and be who you want to be, not what you think others want you to be.

And I'd say, for the most part, you gotta put yourself first if you want to get what you want/deserve in life.

 

[Dr. Bill Kobb]

This all reminds me of that horrible pop song from the 80's, "You've got to be cruel to be kind, in the right measure, cruel to be kind, says that I love you, baybee, gotta be cruel to be kind..." :speechles