Things I Would Never Want to Be...

[Amnesiac]

There are many things in this world that I would never want to be, and many of us share a similar idea. However, I will scale them down slightly and make a short list of them...some of them jobs, others are just plain things I'd never want to be period.

I'll make an antithesis of this thread some time from now, but for the meantime, let's get some lists from you.

THINGS I WOULD NEVER WANT TO BE

- A dung beetle
- A monkey in a zoo
- The tester for rectal thermometers
- One of those garbage scavengers in third world countries
- A coprophiliac
- A fluffer (No disrespect to any fluffers out there)
- A P.O.W....anywhere.
- A prisoner in Siberia
- The scrawny guy in a maximum security prison
- An assistant for Gary Busey
- A cameraman for National Geographic
- A guy who gets a disease named after him
- A proctologist
- The person who has to read the next Tom Clancy manuscript
- A homeless person
- Anybody with MS or Parkinsons Disease
- A construction worker in Arizona

Okee-dokee...your turn.

 

[TklDuo-Drew]

The Proctologist is a good choice....but I can think of something even scarier...

Mike Tyson's proctologist


Drew

 

[TKpervert]

I just count my blessings (daily) as a ROF and shine it on...

 

[TickleMantis]

...I would love to be a monkey in a zoo!...a good zoo.


Auckland Zoo once had the hippos escape when there was a flood and they couldn't find them. Turned out they were playing in the fountains in the park next door at about 3am.

The monkeys escape all the time too but they hardly ever tell anyone and they always come back. If I was a monkey I escape and chase all the pretty women about tickling them as I went....BWA HA HA...I'll go now.

 

[BigJim]

The Proctologist is a good choice....but I can think of something even scarier...

Mike Tyson's proctologist


Drew

No worries about that Drew. That guy's so far up his OWN arse, he doesn't need a proctologist.

 

[Ticklebell]

One of those septic tank cleaner guys. I'm glad we don't use those things in San Diego...

A person who carries out the death penalty. Couldn't live with myself.

A June Bug. Damn, those things are stupid.

Martha Stewart. I don't care how much money she has!

Liza Minelli. Eek.

Mwah!
-Bell

 

[Limeoutsider]

There are alot of things I wouldnt want to be- famous, sunburnt, etc.

 

[phfttklr]

Things I wouldn't want to be...

1.Dead

2.Big Jim's socks

Note: If I were to be #2, please disregard #1

Sorry Jim, just felt like being silly.

 

[TickleMantis]

An alzheimers sufferer.

 

[TickleMantis]

An alzheimers sufferer.

 

[Sunriseticklee]

A TEACHER!!!

Damn... too late!

 

[nosforatiop]

-Bitter
-Depressed
-Miserable
-A prisoner of any kind
-A member of a pop-punk band
-Handicapped mentally or physically
-a heroine addict
-an alcoholic
-a door to door salesman
-a telemarketer
-a porn star (unless it was tickling porn and I got to tickle the women)

 

[ShiningIce]

A science expieriemnt......................no way that might be cool afterall......

 

[grippedchimp]

Lemme see...

- An Abu Sayyaf hostage
- A member of a manufactured band (with my looks, it ain't likely anyway)
- Someone who has porked Alicia Douvall, Jordan, etc. Noy likely either
- Having no hands. There's no point for me living without hands as I'm great with them
- A redneck living in a caravan/trailer. We have those in the UK too
- A Bermondsey boy. God, they suck
- A vegetable
- A cocaine addict
- A yuppie (linked to cocaine addict)
- Michael Jackson's child

I'll think of more...

 

[sole seeker]

just off the top of my head:

without honor
without religious faith
hopeless
humorless
disloyal
uncaring
cowardly
thick as a brick (room-temperature IQ)
paralyzed
blind
bigoted

 

[TickleMantis]

An alzheimers sufferer.

 

[phatteus]

I wouldn't want to be:

the last person alive
buried upside down in poop
"by myself" at a Marilyn Manson "concert"
a QC manager at a fireworks factory
John Connor of "Terminator"
a one legged man in an ass kicking contest
a fecalphiliac
stranded on a desert island with Jay-Z
stranded on a desert island with any guy.
stranded on a desert island (unless Ashanti was involved somehow)
given a butterscotch enema
a cockroach with self-awareness
an agoraphobic with super powers
addicted to castor oil
aphallic
Michael Jackson's Psychoanalyst
"by myself" at a Pie Tasters concert (ask me about that sometime)


That's all I have for now.....