Actually, Raqua, going to a gathering might really be the easiest way to get involved with the fetish. I've been to
10+ NESTS, and since everybody there is pretty much in the same place as you are, people will talk to each other a lot, and if play opportunities come up, you can participate or not.....your choice. No pressure. In one-on-ones you, obviously, have so few choices by comparison and no protection if the guy is high-pressure. You might find your dream guy one-on-one, but it could happen at a gathering as well.