Deep thoughts

[Illtcklu]

If a man was named Anthony Furst and he had a son and named him Anthony.... it would be Anthony Furst jr. And if junior had a son and named him Anthony it would be Anthony Furst the third!

 

[kered]

If a man was named Anthony Furst and he had a son and named him Anthony.... it would be Anthony Furst jr. And if junior had a son and named him Anthony it would be Anthony Furst the third!

OK old buddy, time to get you back on your medication.

 

[Illtcklu]

OK old buddy, time to get you back on your medication.

I'm cutting myself off the Tylenol!

 

[Tamia78]

Deep Thoughts....

I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having children.

 

[sabaki]

Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.

 

[Tamia78]

It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

When talking to yourself.....is it really necessary to answer.

 

[sabaki]

following the theme

Anytime I see something screech across a room and latch onto someones neck, and the guy screams and tries to get it off, I have to laugh, because what is that thing?

😉

 

[Tamia78]

I wish I had a Kryptonite cross, because then you could keep both Dracula AND Superman away.

 

[sabaki]

If you're robbing a bank and your pants fall down, I think it's okay to laugh and to let the hostages laugh too, because, come on, life is funny.

 

[Tamia78]

I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.

 

[sabaki]

one of my favorites 🙂

Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you're coming home his face might burn up.

 

[Tamia78]

Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.

 

[sabaki]

jack on anger management

Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of its head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.

 

[Ticklerguy4u]

When tasting the delicatacy of cow's tongue...does it taste you right back??

 

[Tamia78]

When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.

 

[sabaki]

Ok, last one for me, I feel bad contributing to the noise to signal ratio here. 🙂 I was trying to have meaningful, on-topic posts. But this is so much fun.


If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is "Probably because of something you did."

 

[tkrexx]

Just because you exist doesn't mean your parents had sex, it means your mother did.

 

[Tamia78]

Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the persons house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of it's head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.

 

[natural tickler]

Wang Zoo is a nuclear weapons chemical plant is Beijing. We know this. The Chinese know that we know. But we pretend that we don't know, and they pretend that we pretend that we don't know, but know that we know. Everyone knows

get it? got it? good! 😱

 

[Tamia78]

Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see.

 

[natural tickler]

If I were an animal, I would love to be a giraffe, with a neck long enough, I can bend over and do myself....ah, to dream..... 😀

 

[Tamia78]

I wish outer space guys would conquer the Earth and make people their pets, because I'd like to have one of those little beds with my name on it.

 

[sabaki]

Are Tamia and I the only ones here who know what Deep Thoughts is? 😛 😉

Also Tamia you totally repeated one from earlier in the thread. 😛

 

[Tamia78]

oops, I freakin did.......and you aren't supposed to post in here anymore.......

If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.