Has Valentines Day got to go?

[kopfhorer1]

Not only does it celebrate the most superficial, least significant aspects of romantic love (which as we all know is just one kind of love), but its not-very-subtle message to anyone who isn't part of a couple is "So, why are YOU still single?". Even if one has freely chosen to be single, it's tough sometimes, and having this saccharine image of happy, loving couples thrust in one's face (as if the images shot at us 24/7 by the popular media weren't bad enough) doesn't make it any easier.

In closing, some ideas for Valentine cards that are a bit more reality-based:

"I love it when you take out the trash without my asking!"

"I really don't like to do that thing you love so much, but let's talk, maybe we can arrive at a compromise!"

"I'm allergic to chocolate. Why don't you help me paint my living room instead?"

"Darling, let's get together and figure out ways to cut expenses real soon!"

 

[the_jimmy_james]

It's even worse for those of us who do have someone, but thanks to the shitty economy...

HAVE NO JOB!

Whooo!! Thanks, Valentine's Day for making everybody feel like shit.

 

[NMKamikaze1]

I'm glad to know I'm not the only one who hates this pitiful excuse for a holiday. I never understood what was so special about Valentine's Day, and I still don't. All people do on this day is buy their significant other a cheap gift or two, then slob each other down. The very thought of Valentine's Day makes my stomach turn:unwell:

 

[the_jimmy_james]

If the day were a celebration of love and affection then great. Instead it's a day that society teaches we should resent someone because they don't buy us a goddamn Whitman's Sampler and dinner at Olive Fucking Garden.

 

[TICKLELOVERS]

Well... we love Valentine's Day (usually) even though it has definetedly become too commercial. We think of it as another reason to express our love for another. It would be nice though to see some LBTG couples as well; as kopfhorer rightly points out is lacking in the mainstream media (despite this we both vote for the Liberal Party in Australia which is very conservative).

Like kopfhorer states it should celebrate all forms of love (obviously not incest, which is evil and not love). Platonic love between friends and family, love for one's soul mate, love for one's nation and love for one's God (although only 4 of the 5 major religions states that there is one God (except Buddhism which does not believe in a creator). So we love Valentine's Day.... but it could be loads better. As for single people, they have the right to be who they are; and please don't let the shameful media make you feel bad. Be proud of who you are. We are.
Love,
Heather and Anna
P.S We :wub the idea of Valentine's Day just not the way its presented. Go Johanna of Iceland!

 

[TickleTheater]

It's even worse for those of us who do have someone, but thanks to the shitty economy...

HAVE NO JOB!

Whooo!! Thanks, Valentine's Day for making everybody feel like shit.

Monopo-mart... errmm Wal-mart to the rescue!!! :wub

Why am I inspired to do such silly things? :huh

 

[kopfhorer1]

Wesson oil isn't a very good skin lube. Coconut oil, which I think Wally's does carry, works a whole lot better (they're both certain death to condoms, but we all already know that).

If the day were a celebration of love and affection then great. Instead it's a day that society teaches we should resent someone because they don't buy us a goddamn Whitman's Sampler and dinner at Olive Fucking Garden.

If I were gonna go the traditional VDay route, I'd buy my significant other a few Lindt bars and/or take her to a restaurant whose objective is something other than the daily stock share price! Or maybe make her dinner myself (and I do the dishes!).

(...we both vote for the Liberal Party in Australia which is very conservative).

I don't hear much about or from politically-conservative LGBT people here in the states, save for the Log Cabin Republicans.

...As for single people, they have the right to be who they are; and please don't let the shameful media make you feel bad. Be proud of who you are. We are.

Right on to that!

LGBT people and single people do have one thing in common - we both have to deal with the feeling of being left out, or being made to feel that something's wrong with us, that if only we found the right partner, we could be normal. This is the cruelest and nastiest of all popular myths. Even if one doesn't consciously believe them, these ideas are embedded in our brain tissues and can wreak all manner of mischief with our minds.

 

[MistressValerie1]

I loathe Valentine's Day and its crappy superficial commercialism. I also have a lot of single friends who hate it for their own reasons, so I don't celebrate or acknowledge it at all.

The following article, while not about Valentine's Day, will be of interest to single and LGBT people who do not conform to mainstream expectations about love and marriage: http://gretachristina.typepad.com/greta_christinas_weblog/2009/01/default-decisions.html

 

[melanie2]

hmm we don't slob all over each other..he usually brings me home a box of chocolates..we don't go out to eat..in years past we've had what we called our Valentine Pizza..but we don't make a big issue of it..i agree it's way out of hand..i mean diamonds for this day? that should be saved for a special anniversary, birthday etc...and i personally don't care for jewelry..i guess i'm not materialistic..

Now what i hate are those "President Day" sales..i mean gesh..what a way to celebrate the Father of our Country's birthday..and LIncoln's also.

 

[TickleTheater]

Negotiations.

@kopfhorer -- I'll be sure to keep that in mind! :cool

I wanted to find one of these with the Ron White wording from the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, but this is more eloquently put. :blush

 

[makemlaugh2003]

It's a holiday I've always found hyper-commercialized and over-rated myself...

...and, as the thread's author shrewdly points out, much of the thematic content, and intent, of the holiday itself seems to be to shame single people into feeling like heathen Pagan social lepers. However, it DOES tend to heighten already-established moods of romanticism and true love when shared by two people that truly belong together. I'd honestly prefer that Madison Avenue generally scale back a notch or twelve regarding the media hype surrounding it, of course (we can keep Russell Stover's and the like in the mix, however...ya have to spend six months between two of your better eating holidays, unless you count Super Bowl Sunday as one like I do), though I'm awfully tempted to personally hand-craft my own Valentine's Day card and mail it out to my ex-wife, wherein the caption would read, "If you had REALLY loved me, you would've been just as hot once I had sobered up." 😉

 

[kopfhorer1]

@Tongue Inch Eek - Hmm, I think I'll send your idea to Hallmark...🙂

The following article, while not about Valentine's Day, will be of interest to single and LGBT people who do not conform to mainstream expectations about love and marriage: http://gretachristina.typepad.com/greta_christinas_weblog/2009/01/default-decisions.html

Greta Christina rocks! She's one of the sanest voices on the subject of relationships that there is. I read her blog every chance I get.

 

[chicag0]

The only people that bitch about how superficial Valentine's Day is are the people who are single or are bitter about relationships.

That said, with Christmas, birthdays, and anniversaries, this year the economy is forcing us to celebrate a bit more simply.

Sweetest Day is by far the most superficial anyway.

 

[FeatherDaemon1]

The only people that bitch about how superficial Valentine's Day is are the people who are single or are bitter about relationships.

That said, with Christmas, birthdays, and anniversaries, this year the economy is forcing us to celebrate a bit more simply.

Sweetest Day is by far the most superficial anyway.

I tend to agree with this sentiment. I enjoy holidays, I always have; it's sort of the point. I could not care less if there is commercialism involved or not. Why care about that? It doesn't dictate to my life if I see a Hallmark commercial or a Gadivas sale at the store. I've been single, married, separated. I've seen the holiday from all angles. However, it has never affected me personally. It's a fun holiday when you have someone to share it with, sure. If you are looking for another there isn't a better holiday out there to make a connection with someone.

 

[TickleTheater]

If you are looking for another there isn't a better holiday out there to make a connection with someone.

Too right! :stickout

 

[Cbarton]

Yes, yet ANOTHER wonderful holiday ruined by massive over-commercialism. Very sad to see. Pretty soon we'll see them push Arbor Day bouquets, Flag Day Cards, and May Day chocolates...any other holidays left for them to screw up???

 

[the_jimmy_james]

The only people that bitch about how superficial Valentine's Day is are the people who are single or are bitter about relationships.

And it's that exact attitude that makes "people who are single or are bitter about relationships" hate the day. That holding-it-over-your-head, I-can-enjoy-it-because-I'm-not-an-unspoken-loser, pressure-to-be-taken attitude.

But, your statement is actually incorrect. I'm neither single nor bitter about relationships and I hate Valentine's Day. I hate it not because of superficiality, but because it is a day that anymore seems designed to make anyone who's single-by-happenstance, or not rich enough to buy the shit that society expects, feel like the biggest, most corn-encrusted turd in the toilet bowl that is life. Due to things beyond my control (Mr. Bush's Bombed-out Economy) I'm without work and thus, without money to buy things like $45 boxes of chocolate, $100 meals, and $500 necklaces.

But boy howdy, I sure am glad that Valentines Day exists to remind me of how goddamn destitute I am. I don't know what I'd do without it.

Fuck Valentine's Day.

 

[chicag0]

First of all, unless you're dating a materialistic nutcase, you don't have to feed into the superficiality of it. Just because some of us enjoy the holiday and celebrating it, doesn't mean we're throwing our economic stimulus packages at everything red.

Most girls, me included, would rather get a simple gift that's romantic, comes from the heart and cost nothing, than a box of candy or some other typical Valentine's Day bullshit that took no thought at all and cost more than it's worth.

Society and candy and card corporations see the day as a chance to make all kinds of money, but it doesn't mean you have to fall for it or give in to it.

I just feel that most people, single or otherwise, should be able to see both sides of the damn chocolate coin.

It's like Christmas. Don't tell me that holiday is not full of superficial bullshit, but there's another aspect to it that is hopefully the reason why most people celebrate it.

 

[FeatherDaemon1]

but because it is a day that anymore seems designed to make anyone who's single-by-happenstance,

If the person involved has such a persecution complex then this hypothetical person is going to feel the pain of their circumstance no matter what day it is.

or not rich enough to buy the shit that society expects,

This hypothetical person is should not give a shit what society expects of them. And his hypothetical date should be happy with whatever he gives her and vice-versa or they should not be together because these people value materialism more than love. Truly though I am sure that his girl understands the circumstances of the times and she is happy to be at his side no matter what. Money is not everything.

 

[melanie2]

I got the best gift ever this year...the fact that he couldn't wait to come home to me after a week away on business..and he did also bring home a small gift for me..and it was the thought that counted..and it was a box of chocolates with a gray kittie on the front..the fact he took time out of his busy schedule to do this for me, and it was totally unexpected, made it the best gift i could receive..and there wasn't any secret diamond hidden among the chocolates..in fact i don't care for jewelry..and i won't open it til hmm this week sometime..

I never really viewed Valentine's Day as a holiday..you don't get time off from work etc..the thing is this..change the channel..turn the radio off..you don't have to listen to the ads..what about Christmas? I would think that's the time of year that those who aren't necessarily with someone would feel the effect much more..Those ads begin in October..and talk about superficial..it's all i see during those months..gifts gifts and more gifts.. and if you've lost someone..that would make Christmas or whatever you celebrate that much more terrible..

Valentine's Day is just one day..it will pass..

 

[Camel26]

My wife and I have been together for over 5 years...we are in an F/F relationship (kudos, Heather & Anna!), and feel as though, even though the holiday is particularly commercialized, it is, as others have said, a day to celebrate, on a calendar, our love. We celebrate all year long--we are constantly doing things for one another (even things as simple as doing the dishes or laundry are INCREDIBLY romantic...)

In years past, we've done the whole mix cd, or staying in and ordering sushi and watching a video...this year, we are going to the local dungeon for a workshop on erotic massage...best valentine's day EVER...

I enjoy the sentiment that is SUPPOSED to be behind valentine's day...but I choose not to buy into the "whitmann's sampler and olive garden" BS...my wife and I are simple people, who are trying to get on our feet financially (she just started a job this week!!! YAY!!!), and are beyond understanding of our crappy finances...we'd rather just be spending time together, and with some of our closest friends, on a day meant to celebrate loving relationships, in all forms.

When I was single, my sorority sisters and other assorted friends and I would go out and either grab a drink, grab a meal, or watch a movie together...in tune with the sentiment of the holiday--celebrating the love in your life, regardless of whether or not it is romantic, or friendship.

Be around the people you love on V-day, bottom line. The rest is all hooey. thumbsup😍:26::sifone::37:

 

[Ninjaboo]

Valentine's day is so annoying... but then again, it's very endearing and can be fun. It's like halloween... it isn't really a holiday but as a culture, we still really like it. And it does have a historical background.

Should it go?

I don't think so.... I just wish it wasn't so obnoxious.

 

[Duke Diablo]

Before, I used to love Valentine's day. I have seen it as a confirmation of my life as a single, a day when I would celebrate it. Nobody to take out on a date, nobody I would have to take care of, nobody to nag and annoy me, nobody to slow me down. A paradise, compared to being in a relationship.

Now I kinda dislike it because some of my friends think its a big deal or loathe it, and just go out with the company for the sake of not being alone on Valentine's. Also, every now and then someone tries to fix me with their friend, if only for V's day, so she wouldn't feel lonely. I pass, since I don't wish to ruin the day by having to drag someone along on the date the whole day, which is one of the reasons I'm single.

So, should V's day go? No no. You can celebrate it if you wish, but don't have to. Don't let society tell you how to live or feel.

 

[chicag0]

If I'm in a relationship, I usually bring it up to my significant other. It doesn't matter either way to me if we celebrate or not. But if I'm single, I usually get those little valentine cards you would get in grade school and maybe some candy and give them out to my friends and co-workers.

 

[MistressValerie1]

But if I'm single, I usually get those little valentine cards you would get in grade school and maybe some candy and give them out to my friends and co-workers.

That's cool; it would be nice if more people did that. (I should do something like that for my employees this year.)