If inanimate objects had personalities, which ones would be the biggest assholes?

[tklbd]

So many HILARIOUS responses...so far!!!

How about the cereal bags, inside the box??!!

"Oh...so you're gonna grab me in the middle...and try to tear me open, evenly?? I think not!!! 😛 I think I'll tear down the side!!! That way when you want to pour the cereal...HALF OF IT MISSES THE BOWL!!!"

I know some people may use scissors...but how many...really?? LOL!!!

 

[Sodahead]

Google can be an obnoxious douchebag.

"Did you mean innocuous" ....so snarky.

"Oh you want to ask me questions? Here's five hundred irrelevant answers...hope it helps"

 

[Bohemianne]

Google can be an obnoxious douchebag.

"Did you mean innocuous" ....so snarky.

"Oh you want to ask me questions? Here's five hundred irrelevant answers...hope it helps"

LOL @ that!

Let me also add the URBAN DICTIONARY.

"Oh, Mr. Thesaurus just won't squeal the words below the belt."

 

[Sodahead]

LOL @ that!

Let me also add the URBAN DICTIONARY.

"Oh, Mr. Thesaurus just won't squeal the words below the belt."

lol yeah! Urban Dictionary is like that class clown who is funny until you become the target of their pranks.

 

[Libertine]

Were there a life form on earth equal in malevolence to the wire coat hanger, it would justifiably have been hunted to extinction millennia ago.

 

[carol8961]

socks

You put a pair of socks in the dryer but one always goes missing....it's like they play tricks on you. "Hey, you go hide over there...she'll never find you! Watch her look all over for you!! LOL LOL LOL!!!!"

 

[Nedstacey2]

Traffic lights.

"Oh, you're such a good boy, what a law-abiding, careful driver. Sure, you just keep going that ol' speed limit and we'll all sync up for you, just like it says 'in the book' we're supposed to . . .

"Mmm, close enough to smell you now. Woops, sorry, I just felt like going yellow for the hell of it. C'mon, slowpoke, speed up just a little; don't wimp out and hit the brakes, you'll get through me. Five, four, three . . .

"Ah, too late, say hello to Mr. Red--and you're in the middle of the intersection, dumb-ass, better floor it and pray no cop's around.

"Phew, you came out of that one O.K.; never mind all those honks, fingers and 'Maniac!'s. Look, we're all green up ahead as far as your eyes can see. Yeah, better go fast now, you don't wanna get any more quick changes . . .

"(Ready up there, Clarence? Here he comes . . .)

 

[Bohemianne]

DVD R/RW.

"Just to let you have a 0.5mm thick thread to hold on to while dangling on a 1000-foot cliff... Be calm, you have back-up files on DVDs."