One thing people need to understand on the PMs is that people are people. There not play toys, their not for you to start off your fantasies with as soon as you see someone, you need to treat them like an actual person. Its like Karen said, mostly women have this issue where guys pm mostly to start off tickling or asking bout there feet blah blah blah. If your not gonna bother to A) read a profile to get a little incite about the person B) Care to know the person beyond a fetish C) Actually care about the person in general just don't PM. It sucks because those on phones can't ignore or block annoying pmers who have no concern for a person, just see another fetish playmate. I have pm'd a lot of people, and gotten to know many good female and some male friends through it. If your not gonna ask politely to pm someone and actually talk like you if you were in a coffee shop or something, than yes your not gonna have great success with PMs that's just the life. If someone don't wanna pm with you, don't get mad and angry and bash them for it. If they only wanna talk to women, don't give them a hard time. Stop assuming every girl is a guy, just be yourself, forget about this just being a fetish site, because these are real people. If you understand that, ya might have greater success in PMs.